I'm usually fairly optimistic, but having a terrible day, feel complete despair, like I'll never be 'normal' again.....

[Lolalois]

I don't know where to start really, I just feel so miserable today. I want to get into bed, pull the covers over me and ignore the world. I"m so sick of feeling crap and it feels like its going on and on, getting worse not better.

A bit of brief background.... I was sub clinically hypo for a couple of years, but then symptoms (and results) worsened and I started on thyroxine in Feb 2012. I felt a bit better for a while, then symptoms worsened again and I upped my dose from 50-75mg. Following that, in retrospect I can see I had a complete adrenal crash, but at the time my GP's just shrugged their shoulders.

I went to a doctor on the thyroid UK list and has my adrenals tested, sure enough my cortisol and DHEA were very low. I had felt rubbish throughout the autumn, with problems sleeping, terrible digestion and fatigue. By January, although my adrenal result were poor, I was feeling slightly better so decided on a fairly minimalist approach of lots of B vits, liquorice & ginseng & vit C. I felt increasingly much better until I went on holiday at Easter and for some reason, that precipitated another crash. I slept terribly on holiday, and things have got worse since I returned.

I contacted my doctor who asked me to double my vits & minerals, but this made the fatigue & sleep problems worse, so I cut back down to normal again. Then he suggested DHEA and nutri adrenal. I said I would start them one at a time and started with the DHEA. Although that doesn't seem to have had any marked effect on me in itself, the fatigue and sleep problems are worse to the point of becoming unmanageable, so I've stopped taking it today.

It took me hours to get to sleep last night, and once again I feel exhausted. maybe the DHEA was lifting my mood slightly as I feel absolutely terrible today. It seems everything I try just makes my stressed adrenals worse, so it feels like I'll never get better. I feel completely negative, which is unlike me, and jealous of my family who don't have these problems (ridiculous I know, so self indulgent). It just feels like this has been going on for such a long time, on and off, that I've almost forgotten who I used to be. I'm finding it hard to get through the day as the fatigue is so bad and feel like I can't face day after day of it. Quality of life has hit an all time low.

I was hoping that writing it all down would help me to feel better. I know I need to snap out of it and try to get on with the day. But I'm struggling to...

No doubt some of you have been in the same position, and no doubt I will eventually get better, but today that feels like a distant reality.Fingers crossed for a better day tomorrow.

[PinkNinja]

I'm so sorry you are having such a bad day It is so frustrating when you know what is wrong and you know what to do but it just doesn't work for one reason or another.

Sleep is a really big thing with adrenals, and rest in general. If you can, put your feet up and rest as much as possible today but also try to get out for a gentle walk (followed by another rest with feet up). I know it's not going to cure it, after all it's a long process, but perhaps it might make it a little easier for you to sleep.

I found taking a magnesium supplement at night helped immensely with my sleep. If you can't tolerate the oral supplements, a bath in epsom salts is just as good. The magnesium will be absorbed through the skin.

Hopefully when you begin to get some sleep again, you will start to fall into a better sleep pattern and hopefully you will then start to feel better again.

(((Hugs)))

Carolyn x

[Lolalois in reply to PinkNinja]

Thanks for this. I just had that thing where someone being nice to you makes you want to cry. I've been doing exactly what you suggested actually, walked the dog, read the papers etc. I know it's pointless dwelling on it but its hard not to sometimes.

The sleep thing is totally random with me, good nights bad nights. If its a bad night nothing helps, I've tried most things, including magnesium oil. If my body is functioning normally I don't have any problems with sleep, but the adrenal thing seems to have caused that symptom in me.

I'm just desperate to move forward, and also to feel that I'm doing seething 'constructive' about it, hence the frustration at everything making it worse. I'll talk to my doctor in the week and see what he has to say. Hopefully he'll come up with some sort of miracle!

[Karispitit in reply to Lolalois]

Have you tried melatonin for your sleep problem? I have been taking it for 12 years now. If I didn't take it I know I would be very ill through lack of sleep. I don't have any sleep problems at all anymore. It's a life saver for me.

[greygoose]

Fatigued adrenals do have an effect on sleep. Did you try the Nutri-Adrenal? It might have helped.

I really feel a bit iffy about taking ginseng and liquorice for adrenals. People say they help but I think they stimulate, which is not what fatigued adrenals need. They need rest.

However, vitamin C is essential and it might be a good idea to start taking that again.

I didn't know vitamin B12 helped adrenals but I do know you can get horrendous symptoms from low vit B12, so might be worth taking again.

And how is your salt intake? You're not on a low salt diet, are you? Adrenals need salt, so not the right time to avoid it. Given the attitude to salt in the UK, I think half the population are going to go down with adrenal fatigue sometime soon!

DHEA is a difficult thing. It doesn't suit everyone. When I took it it went straight to testosterone and I was covered in spots!

What I take for my adrenals, to give them a bit of a rest, is HydroCortisone. I know a lot of people won't consider that, a lot of people think it's dangerous, and a lot of doctors don't know how to manage it, but ask your doctor and see what he thinks about it. It sounds as if your adrenals are in a bad enough state to warrant using it.

Take care of yourself, Grey

[Lolalois in reply to greygoose]

Hi Grey, thanks for this, I haven't tried nutri adrenal as yet, but guess that'll be next on the list. I don't blame you for going the HC route, if all else has failed you need to do what you need to do to feel better. I get the impression it's used a little more in the US than here, although I'm not sure on that. Has it helped?

Re diet, I use loads of sea salt, to the point where my partner occasionally raises an eyebrow! I also had to cut out wheat and dairy as have had loads of digestive problems, and I take probiotics and enzymes, which have helped a lot. I try to lay off sugar, but I'm partial to a cheeky baileys!

It's not particularly b12 that I take, I think it's more b5 & 6 in a multi B vitamin tablet, which I think are meant to support the adrenals.

Who knows what it'll take, but something needs to give, I can't carry on like this forever, it's not fair on me, but also not fair on my family either.

Off for some more vitamin C for now.....

L x

[greygoose in reply to Lolalois]

Well, I don't know much about the US, but it's pretty widely used here in France. Yes, it has helped. Unfortunately, the first time I tried it, about six years ago, I came off it too early. Now I've had to go back on it again. You just can't rush these things!

It sounds like you're doing all you can from a diet point of view, but it's not easy giving up the sugar, is it. I like Baileys too!

But your're right, of course, you can't carry on like that. I do hope you get an intelligent response and some help from your doctor and that things work out ok.

Hugs, Grey

[poing]

Snapping out of it never worked for me...

When I feel really bad, I retreat and do whatever I feel that I need to do to recuperate. That didn't work out so well when I had small children, but they are not small now. On a super bad day, that involved watching back to back episodes of Grey's Anatomy in a kind of trance. Whatever it takes...

When my body lets me down and my mind has disappeared into the mire along with it, I take refuge in the fact that it won't last forever. Trying to force myself to feel something that I don't feel just makes it worse. Sleep always helps tremendously whatever time of day it is... I believe that I've had adrenal fatigue for many years, and sleep has been the one thing that I could count on to help me feel better.

I would focus on what you can do about sleep patterns. Carolyn made some good suggestions. Getting into bright sunlight during the day and then a really, really dark room for sleeping also helps because it encourages the right patterns of melatonin production and that helps you sleep.

Sending you lots of positive vibes.... I hope today is turning out to be a better day.

[Lolalois in reply to poing]

Thanks poing, I do feel slightly better now, but the lack of progress is monumentally frustrating. I've changed so many things, working less hours, changes to diet, supplements etc, and of all the things to cause a setback a holiday was disappointing.

But I know you're right, I should listen to my body and do what it needs. I can relate to your trance like state, that's how I feel, very detached, which upsets me as I want to enjoy time with my family. Having said that, my teenage son has been a bit difficult over the last few months, which has possibly contributed to the current situation, but at the same time he's lovely, and I want to spend time with him while he's still willing to spend time with me!

The sleep thing is just weird, it's not something I've got any history of problems with. I've tried all sorts of supplements, I've got blackout blinds, I get plenty of fresh air walking the dog. I try not to sleep in the day to keep a good routine, and I go to bed at the same time every night. I don't clock watch and don't have to get up too early, so you would think I'd be ok. Some nights it's no problem at all, but occasionally I'll just be dropping off and then suddenly become awake again, unable to get to sleep for hours (or at least it feels like that). It definitely relates to my adrenals, as I never had it before they we problematic. I love sleeping, so it drives me mad and also makes me very fed up.

I tend to feel slightly better in the evenings. I think it's because my cortisol is very low, but compared to where it should be its closer to it in the evening than the morning, if that makes sense.

Anyway thanks for the support, and fingers crossed for a better day tomorrow.

L x

[poing in reply to Lolalois]

A few more thoughts... for years, waking me up was like pulling teeth... for the person that was doing it anyway. I've finally trained my husband on how to wake me up nicely, and now everything has changed. Gah.

One thing that changed was digestive problems and infections.... if I have any kind of infection or inflammation now (I'm gluten sensitive so that counts) then I start to wake up with a gasp at odd times of night. When the adrenals actually do their job, then cortisol follows inflammation... if there's an immune response, then cortisol rises, and for some reason this seems to happen at inconvenient times, like the middle of the night. Or maybe its just that you're already awake in the daytime, so it doesn't present in the same way. Digestive problems can do this too even when there aren't any obvious other symptoms.

And I'm not surprised more vits didn't help. I think all the B vits perk you up... and so should only be taken in the morning. I once tried taking them later in the day and that was a mistake.

I really needed B12, and took that on its own, but it messed with my sleep patterns. I took 1000mg a day for just four weeks before that started happening, and had to cut it back. I seem to be particularly rubbish at absorbing B12 too so there wasn't much change in my blood levels even though there was a dramatic effect on my sleep. I don't think this is so unusual - I've heard of it happening to others - and I wondered how much B12 is in your multivitamin. Maybe its too much for you.

Anyway, hope that helps... and I should have said hoping for a better day tomorrow (thought it was tomorrow already, wishing my life away).

[Wired]

I can totally relate to the feeling of wondering if I will ever be "normal" again. I'm 4 years into my hashi hypothyroid journey and there are days that I believe I won't be. I guess I've been trying to learn acceptance of my illness, so that my frustrations don't become so high that it makes me feel worse. A lot harder than it sounds

I've barely enough energy today to type this, and my brain is very cuffuddled! But it's one of "those" days and i'm going to kick my feet up and tell myself it's ok, tomorrow is a new day.

[Hidden]

I'm with you on the ever being normal again. Drs don't seem to understand that some people lack the quality of life they once had. I wish there was a method to putting Drs in the patients shoes for a bit. Sending you some positive vibes too. I know how crappy it is, even if you do sleep you just can't wake up and feel like you haven't slept. And clock watching.... !!

I can highly recommend melatonin + ZMA an hour or so before bed time with a nice cup of camomile tea.

[Lolalois in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for this, what's ZMA? I've been reluctant to try melatonin as my sleep patterns are so random. Lots of the time I sleep ok, then a couple of times a week it'll take hours to go off for no apparent reason. I guess my adrenals are probably not producing melatonin as they should, but have also heard that supplements reduce your natural production?

Quality of life is such an important issue. Its my birthday next week and I remember I was a few months into this, this time last year. At that time I would never have thought that a whole year later I still wouldn't be sorted. I'm determined to get there and to be fair, the private doctor I now see is good, however my NHS experience has been thoroughly disappointing unfortunately.

Fingers crossed we might re-acquaint with our old selves sometime soon...

L x

[Heloise]

So sorry you can't get better treatment. It seems to unnecessary. I've been studying this article on adrenals and am considering taking adrenal cortex or ACE. What do you think?

stopthethyroidmadness.com/a...