I understand what that feels like. I've been incontinent on several occasions, starting from my early twenties. Has he kept a food diary? Or done the FODMAPS elimination diet? I was able to reduce about 75% of my urgency with food changes. It's a pain to sort out. Most of my triggers are particular fruits and veggies, and corn is particularly evil and in everything (corn starch, corn syrup, gluten free products, etc).
One trick that has saved me from a close call is to distract my mind when the sudden urge hits. I'll repeat a mantra again and again in my head, something like 'this too shall pass'. Because the alternative is to think that I'm going to poop without a toilet, and as soon as I think that it's all over. By distracting myself I can buy myself some time to find a toilet. In a pinch if I'm particularly anxious I'll wear a diaper. I realize this probably wouldn't help much, but it provides some psychological comfort. This is important as the more stressed I am, the more likely I am to have IBS flare-ups.
Let us know if you have any questions, or he can come here and vent to an understanding audience. I'm happy to answer any questions, publically or through the private message.
Sometimes he can go for days without a flare up then all of a sudden he can have a bad day or week.
He's got his mock GCSEs coming up soon so he'll prob be stressed for those so it'll prob flare up then.
He's great full the teachers and scouts now understand that he may need to nip to the toilet whenever he needs to. We have found cheese and fizzy drinks upset him.
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