My husband has been diagnosed with severe IBS back in February 2022, and since then he had to give up his job and try to make sense of his life in general and try to recover and start over. In the first few months, he was literally in bed, with no will to live. He felt stabbing pain around his belly and felt like he is popping himself, he feels his bum irritated and even when he coughs, is painful, the GP prescribed Mebeverine, which helped for a period, but the pain is there continuously. this is affecting his quality of life significantly, he is tired of going to doctors who don't want to investigate things further. He eats very carefully and he tries to exercise when the pain allows him to. he had this kind of pain since he was a child, but just after 35 y has been diagnosed and then left in the system. for the last 10-15y, the main cause of the pain was stress and frustrations, those things have been moderated and he started to have a bit more motivation.
we have adopted a cat last August to help him therapeutically and it did the trick and still is. At the moment he is still with no job, and he tried last year to get a job, keep himself calm, trying not to stress or frustrate.... pain just came back suddenly with no explanation, and even in the last week, he had days when he is got the energy of a baby until the pain struck with no reason and he loses all hope in seconds and any willing to live.
This struck me as I'm trying my best to look after him, to motivate him as much as I can, but the pain is there, and there is nothing I can help to take it away.
I don't know if you have a similar situation, but is there anything else I can do to help him?
Thank you
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Calyps0
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Hi, I'm sorry he is going through this. I myself am also going through the exact same thing as him. It can affect our mental health so much. May I ask, did he manage to get PIP/Disability payment from having IBS? I cannot afford to give up work but I cry every day due to the pain.
Hi, Thank you for sharing your pain too. we haven't even thought about that, we went through UC and that helps a bit, but not much. I hope you will find a way to manage this in a way cause is not the way we should live life.
My life has been a constant struggle for two years, horrendous pain constantly, sore burning, painful rectrum the constant battling has caused me to have bad panic attacks and nerves that are shredded, I have been diagnosed by my GP with IBS but no treatment to help at all,but the Good news is I have at last been granted an appointment with a consultant at a big Hospital on the 7th of Feb at long last, at times I have not wanted to be here at times I B S is hell to live with it ruins your life.
Does he know what his triggers are? First step would be to find out what they are by keeping a wellness diary this will help to identify what his triggers are and learning what works for you have a read about the dairy here theibsnetwork.org/blog/how-...
There may be other factors that are linked to his symptoms that have nothing to do with food, ie stress, anxiety life style factors, work. Taking medications, may well not be the answer.
Taking medications and diet, lifestyle changes ect will help but once he has discovered his triggers, there may be something causing them that he is not aware of and then he can start to look at what works for him diet or medication and self-management. A healthy diet isn’t always the solution some parts of that healthy diet may be a trigger food for him. Have a look at this factsheet here IBS (bda.uk.com)
Have a look at the range of details factsheets on our website Fact Sheets | The IBS Network
As I’m sure he may understand IBS is a very individual condition that affects people in different ways. There is no specific cause as to why it develops and therefore no single effective treatment, but by understanding how it affects him personally and what contexts make his symptoms worse and also those that relive them, he can learn to control and manage it.
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I really appreciate your feedback and all the useful information.
However, he had some investigation, like an abdomen scan, stool and urine tests, and blood tests, and all came fine - this is the weirdest thing, and because of this, they have not referred him any further.
Sorry about what am i about to say, as it might be gross, but it's the reality of our situation. I know IBS symptoms are different from person to person, overall, bowel movement is actually fine, with no bloating or diarrhoea, however, the pain is while the stool is moving, and it's worse (even stinging feeling) after realising it. this reality put's him down to bed for days. this I cannot explain, I guess is very irritated and the wound can't heal itself. he had good rounds of pro-biotics, which helped sometimes but you I guess you can't take them all your life... he is very discouraged by the GP, and we might need to change it....if no further help is provided.
I have celiac, BAM and IBSC and recently diagnosed with fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia makes you over sensitive to pain as it effects the nervous system. So you feel the normal gut movement as pain, in my case it is more stress related. Of course I have to go gluten free and also lactose free. My Doc put me on amitriptyline (a mild anti depressant) which calms the nervous system. It has helped a lot, but not the whole answer. IBS is a symptom of fibromyalgia. Worth looking in to.
Calyps0, check into oxalates in foods as possibly contributing to IBS. In addition check into anti thiamine factors that diminish or destroy thiamine (vitamin B1). Thiamine plays an important role in gut health and needs magnesium for activation. Pain and stress cause a loss of magnesium. Always consult your health care professional before using any supplement.
Also, in the first instance, I would try Alflorex probiotic, since the pain may be due to over sensitising of the gut nerves due to a gut bacterial imbalance (dominance of bad bugs in the gut). Alflorex has been scientifically studied for IBS and has been the probiotic that has helped me the most. It has greatly helped to reduce my IBS pain and make me more tolerant to different foods.
I am exactly the same it is so disabilitating but it is not recognised as an illness .I take Mebeverine and Loperamide but I find Buscopan is very good for stomach pains .
Hi, I’m so sorry your husband is suffering. I’m think the health service need to look into it, maybe a colonoscopy? Not right to have constant pain. Maybe it’s something more.
Has he tried peppermint oil capsules/ tea they’re antispasmodic.
Gut hypnotherapy is out there I’ve not looked into it.
Hello, I recently became a certified herbalist so feel free to message me. I am sorry that he is in so much pain and that it is localised to this part of the body. I think that he could possibly be not absorbing nutrients properly if it is really post-stomach, as a lot of absorption comes from the intenstine. Has he been tested for diverticulitis? It may be an option. However, in this case, I would recommend probiotics, a course of garlic and celery capsules (to kill an nasties in the stomach, garlic works as a natural anti-bacterial and is useful for men as it doesn't interupt birth control in the case that it does with women. celery seed extract will kill an h-pylori infection. Both can effect blood sugar hence they should be taken with meals. Also, aloe vera juice (the kind you get at holland and barrett) can be okay to sooth the digestive tract before meals.
I first had bad bouts of ibs when I was around 22 years old , by the way I'm 48 now. I've had cameras down my throat. Been on loads of different medications all of which eased the symptoms but never cured. I made food diarys which helped and found that when I got a bad flare up that low fibre food helped. Just chicken eggs and meat I ate and it eased. Still not cured though. Then one doctor said I'm going to take your bloods and do a full test. Turns out I had hypothyroidism and put me on levothyroxine 2 years ago and been better digestive system wise since. Hypothyroidism slows the bowels which causes the spasms and pain and in my case constipation. Hope your husband finds his cure. Sometimes you need a good doctor that doesn't just palm it off as ibs and doesn't look for other things.
hi, I have had similar pain for ages and seen numerous specialists as well as becoming an expert on dr Google.
My last specialist visit was with a pain specialist who confirmed my thoughts that whilst the all encompassing phrase IBS is a description of the symptoms it is not a description of the cause which he feels is due to pelvic floor dysfunction. Ladies get this afte4 child birth where their pelvic floor muscles relax too much and have to do exercises to strengthen their pelvic floor. A few unlucky men get the total opposite, where their pelvis is under constant tension and needs to relax, this is sometimes brought on by stress, continually sitting for too long in one position or plain laziness by not exercising.
Look it up on line, try to find a male pelvic floor specialist, or myofascial massage release therapist. One great exercise is to lie on your back with feet wide up a wall, you will feel the tension in your hamstrings, which are caused by tight back and pelvis. It takes time but work at it twice a day
have you looked up Anal pain on the nhs website it mentions several things it might be - there may be something that helps you help him.
praying he can get more help and see a specialist if nothing is changing as giving up his job is a big thing for him - so it must be bad.
Do hope you can make some progress with a referral to a specialist. There are bowel clinics around the country too that you could ask for a referral too.
There is also a new good program on tv that is dealing with several things to do with bowel health it has a silly name -,but it is a very helpful medical program that might show something relevant to him, it’s called know your shit - but it is a serious program on bowel conditions. I was very impressed with the information given.
- people come on with a variety of conditions. They are very brave to talk about them.
it’s on channel 4 on Tuesday nights just in case it helps you or someone else reading this too.
As someone with IBS, I am painfully aware of how distressing it is for our partners and it's part of my motivation for finding a solution.
Just a thought. As well as looking thoroughly into each possible physical cause, would he consider trying to manage the stress by using Cognitive Behavourial Therapy? It is something one can do at home, supervised by phone or face-to-face and is sometimes less scary than "going to see a counsellor." I found it helped me manage a stressful situation through a set of practical exercises.
I too had these symptoms long ago as a young person, but CBT only appeared when I was much older. A GP can refer him, but I imagine the waiting in some areas is long.
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Struggling with IBS D 
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