Grrr!: I feel so frustrated this morning! My... - Quit Support

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Grrr!

Samday1 profile image
Samday15 MONTH WINNER
11 Replies

I feel so frustrated this morning! My partner had someone come over to the house at 9.30 this morning without telling me. I had nipped out to the shop and got home to him sat having an appointment.

I felt really embarrassed and really angry. It’s a small situation but I normally would have stormed out and sparked up.

I resisted. I didn’t smoke but I’m still angry at him. We then continued to argue and now are both sat in separate rooms stewing and I’m regretting the things I’ve said.

He said I’ve been really awful this past week, I filled up and screamed “I know, I’m sorry, I’ve given up smoking, I can’t help it”

I thought he would understand but he just carried on saying he’s sick of me and my attitude.

😖😖😖 I’m just so fed up of feeling like I’m about to bubble over!

The bottom line is that I didn’t smoke even though everything in my head is telling me things will be ok if I just have a cigarette and calm down.

I guess this is me just getting used to dealing with life without running away for a cigarette and forgetting about the issues I have.

Just cigarettes but they can be powerful and affect life!

Maybe that’s why I have so many underlying resentments - because I run away and smoke away my anger?!

Anyway, sorry to be a negative nancy at 10.30am!

The weathers nice and I have the rest of the day to enjoy 😍

Deep breath and smile x

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Samday1 profile image
Samday1
5 MONTH WINNER
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11 Replies
jillygirl profile image
jillygirlAdministratorQueen Bee

Hi Sam, I feel for you, we nearly all come across aggressive and its hard for partners to understand. Does your partner smoke, if so he should encourage you and not think about himself. If he is a non smoker then its hard for him to understand what you are going through. Many people who dont and never smoked think you should just stop and thats the end of it. They dont understand we get withdrawal symptoms. Ride it out and tell him your quitting for your health and also saving lots of money too. He will come round eventually. :) xxx

Samday1 profile image
Samday15 MONTH WINNER in reply tojillygirl

Thank you jilly!

He’s an ex smoker so he kind of understands but I guess it’s really unpleasant being on the receiving end if there’s a reason for my behaviour or not!

We have kind of made up and I’m going to have a small snack and water to see if that eases the feeling of frustration.

I feel like a child having a tantrum! It can be like riding a wave with all these emotions 🙈

Thanks for your support. It made me feel a little more “normal” 😍

Veteran250 profile image
Veteran250

Just take a step back and go see your partner to say sorry, you are not at fault but someone has to say sorry in order for you to go foreward with your relationship, and ask your partner to help and support you in your journey to quit.

Good luck 🌞😀

Samday1 profile image
Samday15 MONTH WINNER in reply toVeteran250

Thanks so much! You are SO right! I know that sat being grumpy doesn’t help, thanks for your support! X

Veteran250 profile image
Veteran250 in reply toSamday1

Its what we do in this community Sam . Xx

Rhinette profile image
Rhinette10 MONTH WINNER

Hi Samday ☺really feeling for you. I hate arguments but had a lot especially in the first 3 months, with lots of shouting. My husband and I are OK but I'm embarrassed to see the neighbours...

I hope things have calmed down a bit now. It's horrible feeling out if control and angry. I sympathise.

Hope the rest of the day gets better. 😎

Veteran250 profile image
Veteran250 in reply toRhinette

Rhinette......worry not about your neighbours, just concentrate on your family, and your husband!! Xx

Frostie2560 profile image
Frostie2560LONG TERM WINNER

I used to do just that.... run away and smoke. But I think it’s not the smoking that made it better it was the TIME I had to calm down on my own that chilled me out.

So walking away still might be good.... give yourself a good time out😃. Walking briskly round the block really helped me.

❤️💕

WillowSong profile image
WillowSong4 YEARS WINNER

Sam congrats for not caving to the craving! The emotional seesaw is enough to drive me mad sometimes. You showed your strength by coming here to vent and commiserate so take that as a positive action! You got good advice here

Dolphin09 profile image
Dolphin093 Months Winner

Hi lovefeel proud of yourself don’t let others break you down I live on my own so I ain’t got that problem my mood swings have not been too bad hang in there babe x

Samday1 profile image
Samday15 MONTH WINNER in reply toDolphin09

Well done dolphin 🐬 xxxx keep

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