I don't want to quit but I want to quit!

Hello all you people out there, I'm new and I haven't quit and I don't want to but I WANT TO!!!

I just turned 41 and have smoked for 25 years. I absolutely hate being a slave to smokes but boy how I love smoking! I've decided to give quitting another go for myself but also for my kids. I always go outside and hide from them to have a smoke so I don't think they know but my oldest is 7 and she's becoming very aware of those types of things. So, I don't want to give her the business of "don't do what mommy does".

Anyway, my husband smokes and doesn't plan on quitting and it sure is hard not to smoke when I know he has them but I would like to not kill myself early if possible since this life is already so short and this is one big step to extending my time here. I will say that I think the hardest challenge that I will face is changing my habits. Smoking is so much part of my routine.

So, I plan on starting tomorrow (and just writing that makes me want a smoke!!!). I probably won't be a big poster but I really appreciate all of you putting yourselves out there and being available for support...it makes a huge difference to many, many people...wish me luck! :)

23 Replies

  • The very best of luck to you 🤞🤞

    It is hard if there's another smoker around (my husband still smokes) but you CAN do this.

    Try changing your routine a bit, like........ if you usually sit in the kitchen for your morning coffee....and fag..... try drinking tea in the front room instead.

    It's the little things that help.

    And the lovely ❤️❤️ People on here are always ready and willing to give you all the support you need xx



  • Thanks Karen! Onward and upward!

  • That's the spirit 🎢

    To infinity and beyond 🚀🚀

    Xxxx 🚭❤️🚭

  • Hello!

    I'm 42 smoked for 27 years and hid it from my kids too. My daughter is now nearly 10 (have a 7 yr old son too)so I was having to smoke less or be found out so I eventually chose to quit, rather than be found out and start smoking more again.

    I found the toughest part was breaking the 'me time' fags habit. I tell you what I get more me time without fags now than I ever did with!!.

    I didn't think I could do it and felt just like you do now. You can do it and 4 months down the road I can say that-although it's tough at times it's the best thing I ever did for me and my kids😊

    Good luck, here if you need us 💪💪🚭🚭

  • Frostie2560 you just hit the nail on the head. It is totally the 'me time' habit that will be the hardest! I don't smoke during my work day but I can't hardly wait for that 30-45 minutes of me time after work...I know, I know, that's a long time but I cram in 2 or 3 smokes and maybe a quick netflix show or something to tide me over until they go to bed.

    I'm already really glad that I joined this group...I can tell that y'all (I'm a Texan!) will be great motivators and also give me a big virtual hug when I need it. Thank you. Go Us!

  • Virtual hugs a plenty here!.

    Change of routine helps a lot. So switch it around a bit, see what works and stick to that new routine that you don't associate with smoking. I walk a lot!, run sometimes too. Exercise beats the cravings.

    Wow Texas, never visited, only NYC so far😊. You'll meet people from various parts of the world here.xx

  • Thanks so much for your support...hmmm, that sounds like I'm running for some political office, LOL. Seriously though, thank you.

  • Ha! Maybe you could🤔. Politics... hmmm I could start ranting as we're voting in the UK very soon. But I won't bore your socks off!.

    No problem ES, I was given so much support when I first joined, and still do. Am passing the love on😊. Now I'm sounding like a hippy 😂

  • I love hippies! LOL, well, I'm sure you've been hearing news about the craziness that is going on over here with our politics...each day brings a new brand of stupidity! I mean, the POTUS fired the FBI director!!! Me thinks it smells like a Nixon Watergate scandal brewing...so, please feel free to talk politics - I won't judge! :)

    Okay, so today is Day 1 - so far, so good. I keep hearing the beating of kettle drums in my head and they sound like this "smoke, smoke, smoke, smoke, smoke" kinda like the drums they use on ships to keep people rowing...also, the music that plays when Darth Vader comes on - I believe it's called the Imperial March.

    Hope your day is Awesome Frostiegirl!

    P.S. I promise to be a super pain in your arse with updates about my various emotional states. It's only day one and I've got time on my hands now! Ha!

  • Oh you'd have to be living in a cave to not know what's going on over there. Awful!. Yes I heard the news last night. He's so vile. I just can't get over that you've gone from Obama to Trump😳.

    We're have a really bad time over here. Britain voted to exit Europe but the lies that were told to get the vote were outrageous it ended up being 48% to stay (my vote)and 52% to exit. So many unhappy voters!!.

    We have a Prime Minister that no one actually elected as the other one stood down and now a snap election.... aargh!!.

    Put those drums to good use and make up a really crazy tune... put that smoke out😬. Day 1 is good, you can do it!!. I read this earlier and you put the imperial march into my head since then!.

    Day is nearly over for me. Kids, dinner, bed.... and relax. No fags now, a lovely cup of tea and catch up with Bates Motel, have you seen it?. It's sooo good!

    Update as much as you like, I'm used to pains in the arse, I live with one😆. Love him really.xx

  • I think maybe we are cut from the same cloth! Bates Motel is one of my favorite shows. I watch the episodes on Netflix so I've watched through the second to last season...The last season won't become available until around October I think. Are you watching the last season now?

    I've somewhat kept up with the British politics and it does seem like most people are disappointed with the Brexit and unfortunately it doesn't seem like there will be any positive outcome. Definitely some dishonesty going on...And I've kept up with the French elections too. Le sigh...In all honesty, I feel pretty apathetic about the whole mess. I know that's terrible and it's our obligation to vote and such but geez, it's like the choice we have is either a giant douche or a turd sandwich....lousy.

    I don't know what's going on in the world but I'm not sure any of these people are actually representing the rest of us. They're all self-centered, fear-mongering, money-grubbing.....jerks.

    Well, I guess I have to get back to work. I hope your evening is relaxing - enjoy your show and tea and talk with you soon! E

  • 😂😂. We're definitely on the same page. Going to have to use turd sandwich in a sentence sometime tomorrow😂.

    I'm on the last season on Netflix (S4)and I want to watch it but don't want it to end!. Love all the brilliant British actors you see in different American series too. I'm a walking Dead and Game of Thrones addict also. Hope your evening goes well. Good luck!.xx

  • I know how you feel, I'm ten weeks in and I miss it but I don't ever want to do it again, but I still miss it but the thing is I don't know what it is I miss! Just know it's not enough to go back. Keep strong and in touch and you will feel the same x

  • 10 weeks is AWESOME corrina55! Seriously, good job. You know, I remember being about 16 and sneaking cigarettes with my friends and I always thought that I wouldn't be someone who would get hooked. Dammit if I wasn't wrong. I'm disappointed that my youthful ignorance has gotten me to this place in life but I'm hopeful that I can overcome this giant, enormous obstacle!

    I have let smoking define my life for so long that it is like losing a best friend. So many people here have said the same - that they, that we will mourn the loss...geez, writing this about these stupid inanimate objects seems silly but it is the absolute truth.

    I'm so proud of you and everyone else here for taking on what I consider one of the biggest challenges of our lives. I know we're stronger, better people for it and I know we can weather the storm. I hope you have a nice evening. :)

  • 😉 good luck

  • Hi Escherer...wat a decision..grt..trust me its tough it will be really really tough...but mark my words if u were out of this for 3 months then hurray..me same story..smoker for 20 years that too a heavy smoker..now in 10th week of NOPE (not one puff ever)..I dont know how much you were dependent on it..u may even have severe withdrawal symptoms..but dont give up..best of luck.. May GOD give u tbe courage to do this...

  • Thank you so much for the encouraging words ashwathkrish1, it means the world to know that I am amongst like minded people. And congrats on your super achievement! 10 weeks is pretty darn amazing.

  • Sorry Escherer, I havent been on site to welcome you. This is a brilliant site and we will help and support you all we can. It doesnt matter how long it takes or how many times it takes to quit, we are with you all the way. Let us know when you start your quit and if your using any nrt. and then we can add you to our wall of winners and award you your relevant badge.

    :) xx

  • No apologies needed jillygirl! Thank you for your warm welcome. I've read all of your profile and I commend you on your determination and positive attitude in the face of a lot of adversity. You truly are exceptional.

    So, today is my day 1. I'm just going cold turkey and I haven't told anyone except for this board. This is a different quit than I've tried before. All previous attempts have been broadcasted to the world and so when I failed, it was a big deal. I think the disappointment of failure sometimes makes us snuggle further in to the problem...the idea that "If I can't quit then I'll just go whole hog and throw caution to the wind"...not sure if that makes sense.

    Anyway, this board is it now. I'm already feeling a sense of accountability to you all so I think that will be a helpful tool. I hope you have a lovely day. :)

  • Hi. All the best in advance :-)

    I turned 42 and quit smoking (cold turkey) after 20 years, almost a month ago. I loved smoking but also abhorred it because I would feel uneasy in terms of my energy levels and general well-being all the time by now.

    I must have tried to quit around 25-30

    times in the past few years but it never lasted more than 24 hours and the fact that my husband is a smoker didn't help at all.

    This time I quit and from the moment I did, I swear, I did not once feel the desire to light the next cigarette. I went through physical nicotine withdrawal symptoms but nothing shattered me mentally. And it's all thanks to Dr Alan Carr. Do google him and if you buy into his philosophy you can read his book and download his app. It truly truly helped me and I recommend it to one and all.

    All the best again !

  • Thank you Lemonkiwi! Is your husband quitting with you?

    Yes, it is a love-hate relationship for me too and just like you, it's the physical things as I age that are making me go for the quit again. I've noticed a variety of things starting to happen as a result of this stinky habit...everything from lines around my lips (not too exaggerated but there for sure) to my sense of taste being altered.

    I think I will be able to stay mentally fit through this and it's so funny that I can go for several days without smoking if I'm with people who don't smoke. I went on a 5 day camping trip with my dad and he doesn't smoke and it wasn't a big deal...honestly I only thought about it occasionally but just as soon as I got back in town and to my house where my smoking husband is, all of it went right out of the window.

    Today is Day 1. I can do this! Hope your day is awesome!

  • Well it's super that you don't need to smoke when you are out camping and stuff. That shows your will-power. I have never ever been able to do that unless I have been admitted into hospital for minor surgery. So I have literally smoked every day of my life 😫

    Yes, my husband is still smoking. Which means there are cigs lying all over. But I swear on my babies, I have not even been tempted to light one up once. I wish he would quit but it's an individual decision and he has to arrive at it himself. I pray he does that soon of course 🤗

    All the best. If you don't smoke when you are camping for 5 days you are way stronger than you give yourself credit for.

    Cheers !

  • Good luck on your journey :)

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