Liz passed on at 6.20 this evening. There had been little warning. She had a slight temperature this afternoon, but nothing extraordinary. When they went in to see her at 6.20 she had passed.
I was allowed into the home to see her. I shall talk to her with my heart all evening!
Still in the shock of it all state.
I really just wanted to thank forum members past and present for all of their help advice and support. I say forum members past because this has been an eight year journey and I came to this forum not even understanding what PSP was. Some of the old great names led this terrified and uninformed me through the hoops and gave me the confidence that I could manage the insurmountable. But many folk here now have guided and supported the both of us too.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart and I remember well this place was a haven for Liz on her journey too.
Warmly to all
Kevin
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My condolences to you. I don't post often but I wanted to reach out to you now.
You have always been a great support to everyone here, even when things were tough for you.
As many others will say, now is the time to look after yourself more than ever. Be kind to yourself. Take time to grieve YOUR way. Remember that Liz is finally at peace and free from the evil that is PSP.
Oh Kevin I am so sorry to hear your news, my heart breaks for you dear man, we helped each other through this journey, it is our turn now to be there for you. Sending you a massive hug, Kevin be kind to yourself you looked after Liz so well, you were an inspiration to us all on this site, always ready to lend a helping hand and so wise. Big hugs Kevin Yvonne xxxx
May liz rest in peace free at last of this despicable disease
Now to your own thoughts and another stage
Take everything at your own pace x ❤️
EDIT
To add Kevin, you have always given the hugest support to many here and to me personally. You have gone above and beyond when you were having your own struggles! Without you, my Dad would never have received chc! You have been a lifeline to me on many occasions too many in fact to count! You are my forever friend and I absolutely love you! Always always always here for you! X
Oh Kevin, huge big hugs from me, I hope you get all you love and thoughts over to her tonight, but I’m sure there will be lots to say to her in the future aswell.
Oh Kevin, I am so sorry to hear your news. Prayers and hugs to comfort you, it has been a long journey. You have done an awesome job caring for Liz and sharing the experience with everyone. It will take some time to move through and adjust to this change of focus. Be gentle with yourself, most of all give yourself time.
Next weekend will be my 1 yr anniversary of Kurt going on hospice. I had a totally different vision of this spring, planned on being with his family in Germany when passing the upcoming milestones, but coronavirus changed that. I am finding the ups and downs very similar to a year ago but without the frenetic charge of the imminent end being near. Your love is strong, it will bring you peace. ❤❤❤🌷🌞
Oh Kevin I m so sorry to hear of Liz's passing but have to think it is a blessing that you are both freed from this nasty disease and that she went peacefully in her sleep. It's been a long haul. I feel like I have lost a family member. You all are family.Please take time for yourself and take care. Love and prayers are with you. Hugs from across the pond. xxxxxx
Oh Kevin I'm so sorry. But Liz is at well deserved peace. It's been a long struggle and she certainly didn't have an easy road. You have had to fight for her all the way. The last few weeks must have been so hard for you both.
I know you will need time out to grieve.
A big hug from Jean x xx
Oh, Kevin. So sorry to hear. It was such a long journey for both of you. When I first started on this website in August of 2017 it seemed she wouldn’t last long. What a battle she put up against the disease.
I’m so sorry for your loss of Liz. I went back to some of your older posts from 4 years ago and I love the truck driver story. I guess you can always say that you’re a PSP Caregiver because you are. You’ve been so very helpful to all of us in so many ways. Thank you for being with us. Especially now in your time of need. Liz was lucky to have you. I can see her smelling the Thyme and Oregano. Sweet memories of your beautiful Liz! May she Rest In Peace.
Lovely man, you have been an inspiration on this forum and helped so many people with your research and knowledge. Now it is your turn to let people reach out to you and offer virtual love and support as you announce the sad news of Liz leaving this world. My heart goes out to you, I know you knew the end was imminent but that doesn’t make it any easier when it actually becomes the reality. Be alone with your thoughts, whatever they be. It’s a long hard slog getting over the death of a loved one but rest assured she had had enough and was ready to go. Sending a big hug. Kate xxx
Oh Kevin, Nothing I say will help you at this very sad time but I am thinking of you. You have been such an inspiration and support to us all even though you were going through the horrors of PSP as well. I hope you now get any support you need/want. Dear Liz is now free and at peace. I hope, in your time, you will also feel free and find there is life after PSP.
I am so very sorry for your loss. You have always been a great bastion of this site and I have always gained a sense of how much you loved and cared for your Liz. Sending many virtual hugs at this tricky time xxx
I am so sorry to hear of Liz's passing. From reading previous posts you have been so strong for others. Take care of yourself now. My prayers and thoughts are with you xx
Dear Kevin, I am so sorry to read this news about Liz's passing. It seems it happened so quickly. Although I am one of the later members here, I have regarded you both as real trailblazers, she for her obvious courage and strength and you for your genuine care for us all, showing us how love serves on every level.
Please accept our deep condolences.
Coming to terms with her passing must be tinged with frustration at the reduced accessibility in the last few weeks. But she seems to have been a match for your discernment and sensibilities and I am sure she understood all of the constraints.
I'm so glad you can spend time in reflection.
I am sure the pearls of wisdom you have shared with us all will come back to your remembrance eventually.
Much love and hugs to you now and during this time of grieving.
I am so very sorry to hear of Liz's passing. I must admit that I just sat in my chair and sobbed. I sobbed for you, Liz, John and myself and all the others who share this road with us. It's been along time since I've allowed myself to cry.
Thank you for always being there to offer a soft shoulder, advise or perspective. It's funny how you just attach yourself to certain people in this forum. You my friend, are one of those people to me. Thank you.
I don't know what lies ahead for you, although I know unfortunately I will eventually. Hang on to your memories and I'm pretty sure it's just fine to let the tears flow.
One of my favorite quotes:
"Being deeply loved by someone give you strength,
while loving someone deeply gives you courage. " Unknown
Oh Kevin I am so sorry that you have lost your beloved Liz at such a dreadful time. You have been so supportive to all of us but I hope you can take comfort that she is at last free from this evil disease. Look after yourself now xx
Take every day as it comes, you will find in time your memories are the once from happy times and the sad PSP times move in the background. Kevin, thank you for all the advice you have given it is much appreciated. Take care, hugs and kisses, Maddy xx
To my lovely friend Kevin whom I had the privilege to meet in London. I am so so sorry for your loss. Liz fought a long hard battle against PSP and now she has been given her wings and set free. Your love and caring for Liz shone through in your posts and she will always be with you in your heart. You have also been an inspiration to everyone on this forum, supporting, advising and guiding us through the minefield of forms especially CHC, so thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Now, please be kind to yourself, take care and grieve in your own way as there is no right or wrong way.
Even though we know it is coming there is no way to prepare for the heart ache of losing our loved ones to this cruel disease. I am sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.
You have always been one of the stalwart members of this forum that you described and I thank you. In addition to a wealth of NSH information and guidance, you have always been kind and wise in your responses to posts/questions.
Kevin my sister Jennifer has asked me to pass on her condolences to you. She met you at the meetup in London and described you as the very nice friendly gentleman, so true. xx
I am so sorry that your brave Liz has finally given up her fight. She is now at peace, finally.
You, and her carers in her recent home have all taken such great care of her. I hope the good memories will guide you through.
It will not be easy in the short term to deal with what needs to be done next, and life may not change a great deal for you with this Pandamnit.
Your grief progress will be how you manage it; it no doubt began a long time ago. Whatever path it follows now is right for you. Take care of yourself, make yourself eat, do nothing if that is how you feel. I am sure there will be a voice in your head that is Liz, telling you just that too!
Oh Kevin! What a shock. Such a long, hard road you and Liz have been down together, and then for you to lose her so suddenly. It seems like just weeks ago that Liz led around town, or wanted the house tour by phone.
Kevin, there are no words to ease your pain, just our thoughts. You will wonder if you could have done more. You supported us now let us support you. Now take care of yourself. Rob
Dear Kevin,So sorry to hear your news.You have been such a guiding hand to many of us while dealing with your own struggles.I hope you can find some peace now that Liz is at rest.
I am so sorry to hear this and my heart goes out to you as you begin another difficult journey. Grief is hard enough in normal times but even more so in these strange times that we find ourselves in. I am glad that they have let you in and I hope you found comfort in sitting with Liz and saying everything you needed to, I found great comfort in sitting with Steve after he passed. Just take comfort in the fact that she is no longer suffering and take time for yourself it is a lot to come to terms with . You have been such a support to so many of us on here always saying the right thing and helping us all I hope we can do the same for you now. Take care, rest when you can and take your time.
Very sorry for your loss Kevin. I can only imagine what you and your family are going through. You are in my prayers and thoughts during this difficult time.
Kevin, what can I say, so sorry to hear your sad news..you are the one who has kept me going on this long PSP. journey ,and I'm sure many others. Will say that too. Thank you for the advice...I will be thinking about you...Brenda xxx
Not for expected and inevitable these news flood us with grief and nostalgia.
When I entered this chat you were one of the lighthouses that guided me and taught me to deal with this disease and its consequences. I will say it more times but this occasion is good to thank your dedication to this chat, the patience, the wisdom, the common sense and human warmth carrying a torch that in addition to light gives heat.
Reading your comments and support I have come to develop a feeling towards you that I can describe as heartfelt friendship. I hope that one day I can express in a hug the gratitude and affection that I feel.
I have a photo of Liz and Kevin smiling who has accompanied me on my PC desktop for a long time. When I have difficult moments I look at your photo and move on.
I end up reproducing some lines of Anne that seem very accurate and I can not improve:
"She is at peace and you can lay down the heavy weapons you bore to battle the disease on her behalf. Take care of yourself now. Wherever she is, she knows all you did for her. God bless you."
A beautiful and powerful homage to these wonderful two souls, these replies demonstrate what a beacon Kevin’s advice, knowledge and compassion was and still is . You don’t get many Kevins to the pound, he is one in a million. Xxx
I am so sorry to hear the very sad news of your lovely wife, Liz.
You have given us all on the benefit of your wise words, knowledge and kindness. I am positive we would not have gain CHC for my mother without your informative posts.
Take care of yourself and I send you our love. Thinking of you both in our prayers.
Oh Kevin. What can I say? I am so sorry that Liz has passed away, may she rest in peace, finally free from this evil, evil disease.
Now dear Kevin, is time for you. You learnt a lot of caring skills along the way. Please use some on yourself now. Give yourself time to grieve, to rest. Be kind to yourself, You made Liz's journey a lot easier, through your wonderful care and have helped others on here along the way, me included. For that we will always forever grateful.
My heart goes out to you Kevin, you have been a truly amazing husband. You and Liz have made great memories together and it is these memories that will take you through whatever the next chapter may be. . I’m so pleased you got to see her before she passed and hope you have support from family and friends.
You’re a very special person Kevin and have helped me so much when my mum was here. You answered me and helped when nobody else could. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. May Liz rest in peace now that she is rid of such a horrific illness.
Oh Kevin, I am so sorry to hear your news. Deepest sympathy.
You have been such a stalwart on this list with help and advice for many of us. Sadly, we all know there is only one outcome for our loved ones and when it happens we are never ready, never prepared .
We are all with you in spirit, I hope you can feel all the thoughts and love.
My heart goes out to you. You have both been a shining example to us all on this journey through PSP. Thank you for all that you have done for us. Your experience and expertise gained has been invaluable to so many.
Please take solace from the fact that Liz is no longer suffering from this devastating disease. Be kind to yourself, particularly in these surreal circumstances we all find ourselves in at present.
Oh Kevin, I am heartbroken to read your post. There are no words to convey the sorrow all on here are feeling. We had a few things in common. Our connection to PSP, we both had enormous love for wives and both were called Liz. We never met but I have always considered you a friend. Your advice and guidance to everyone, including me, helped us steer our way through this horrible journey.
Take time to grieve in your own way, there is no time limit. Right now, the main memories will be PSP related but in time these will be replaced by happier memories. Hold on to them. They will bring much peace and comfort. Dear friend, I cry for your loss but I sing for the love that you and Liz shared.
Please accept my sincere condolences for your loss. You have both been in my daily prayers and you will continue to be now. Rest in Peace Liz. Smile on Kevin now and always. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Condolences Kevin, Liz is now at peace and clear of PSP. Remember the happy times you had together and let the others go, it will take time but you will come through. Admittedly 3 yr on I still miss Margaret but the pain has receded.
Take your time don’t rush and let others help you.
Thank you Kevin for being such an inspiration and capable leader to us all. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I have thought so many times during this pandemic that I don’t know how I would have handled it if my Don were still here.It just seems another unimaginable hardship for a caregiver.
You have been a champion for us all,now try to be one for yourself! All my best wishes, Janet
Thinking of you and Liz, Kevin. I hope you find comfort in Liz's passing being quick and hopefully gentle. My Mum's was similarly quick and gentle. She was with my brother, her carer and a paramedic on her journey home from hospital - they all believed she was simply snoozing.
It does bring a lot of comfort being able to "talk" to the loved person who's gone doesn't it?
I hope the William Penn quote (1693) below may be of some comfort:-
"Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas; they live in one another still".
So sorry to hear about the sad loss of Liz. You're in my thoughts & prayers. xxx
I’m relatively new to this site, but your warmth and kindness and love for your Liz have touched me as I continue on this 6.5 year ( undoubtedly longer)journey with my husband of now 50+ years. I’m so sorry that you lost the love of your life. I imagine that we are all blindsided when the moment comes having lived with the shadow of it and trying with all of our might to stave it off for so long. I can only wish you peace and precious memories to see you through.
Heart breaks for you but now she is at peace. You turn to look after yourself and take time out to grieve. Thank you for all your advice and support for us ‘newbies’, 3 years and counting!you and Liz have been an inspiration. Lots of hugs😀😢😀Jayne xx
Oh Kevin. I feel so sorry for you brother. There will be a new star in the heavens tonight. That journey is over and a new one has begun. One that I'm just beginning myself, I wish I could offer more than words of condolences. We are all here for for you... a click of a mouse away.
Dearest Kevin. I have only just put my computer on today and am so saddened to hear your unexpected news. I was pleased to hear that the end for Liz was peaceful, which is what you so wanted for her. I am sure that she can hear you talking to her in your heart, so just carry on doing it. My love and prayers are with you. With reference to what you gained from this this site, you certainly gave back as much as you took from it, if not more. You have been a power of strength and advice for me. Thank you. Big hug AliBee x
May you find peace in her passing. I am so sorry for your loss and pray your grief will lead to knowing her anew. Not looking forward to this part with my husband. We have deepened in so many ways. My heart goes out to you. May God bless and keep you through this time.
I'm so sorry for your loss Kevin. When I first found this site, I believe yours were the first words I read. You and Liz have been a constant here and I feel like I know you. This last stage of your journey will be accompanied by your memories. I'm sure there are many. Let the happy ones help you through this. Take care of yourself now like you've cared for Liz all these years.
I am so sorry to hear your sad news, Kevin. You two were so blessed to have each other. Going forward, may you keep Liz and your memories close to your heart and may they offer comfort and strength in the days ahead.
There are no words to express how sorry I am to be reading this post. We know that life will end, PSP seems to bring it to the forefront of our lives but it doesn't make it any easier when it happens.
I know from reading your insightful posts over the years how much you meant to each other and how much you loved each other. You have been an amazing husband in caring for Liz during her illness, now is the time to care for yourself. Take time out and put yourself first we will be here should you need us.
So sorry to hear that Liz has lost her battle. I lost my Dad 2 weeks ago so I understand when you say you are in a state of shock. Take comfort from the fact that Liz is now free of this awful condition, and take all the time you need to process what has happened. As I am learning, there is no right or wrong way to deal with this.
Kevin, a big hug to console you. I know your grieve will be enormous. Liz has been the center of your world and now it's only you. But she will be in your heart forever. You have done everything you could, and with your knowledge you also helped us very much. Thanks for being on our path.
So so sorry Kevin. You were one of the first people to respond to a question I had about my mum. It is over three years since she passed and I still look on the site trying to understand this awful illness. Please look after yourself now Kevin you have been a hero XXXX
So sorry Kevin. It was going to come one day.... as it will to us all on this site. Your story with Liz has been the single most informative and pertinent to my situation and I have always been grateful for your posts. The coronavirus times have been cruel in not allowing you access to Liz, but ironically there may be a bit of solace in the fact you are now not so alone - everyone is facing up to the fact that they are going to die sometime. Stay strong - the Universe still has plans for a good man like you.
So sorry to hear your news. I am one of the past members (almost a year since I lost pete). I find that I selectively read posts these days but felt that I had to reply to you. You have always been such a support on this site, and have been an inspiration to many. Be kind to yourself and know how many of us are thinking of you and Liz with great fondness. X
Dear Kevin,
So sorry for your news and the only consolation is that she is at peace now. It is such a hard journey, to be sure. It will take time for you to come to terms with it all but you must try. Heartfelt best wishes to you. Chin up and battle on!! What else can we do?
Liz was so tenacious and strong! It’s almost unbelievable that she is “not here”.
We knew it would come but the shock of it is still huge. Even having lost Liz to that unfair state of ill health and immobility that she had to endure for so long, she was still alive and still there, still your Liz. I am so sorry that you are experiencing the final loss. I hope your passage through grief is bearable and you experience moments and glimpses of inspiration and great memory through the pain.
I hope you will still check in here when you feel like it. You have given so much to the community here, Kevin,, and we will still be here for you now.
Oh Kevin...I was shocked when I read your post...I am so sad for you but although her struggle is over it's you now who will need support....You have been here to support us all so bravely...I hope now we can do the same for you...Please take care and I will keep you in my thoughts...sending a very big hug to comfort you....Liz
So sorry it has taken me a while to reply. No imaginative words from me but Sending you a big hug and lots of love at this very difficult time. We are all here for you
Even after all this time, I was shocked and saddened to see this news today. Such a terrible loss. The circumstances don't truly lessen it, no matter how painful they were. That's something I didn't understand before.
I see you are here today helping the community. Blessings be on you, friend of us all. I wish there were truly blessings in my power to bestow, but I wish them for you anyway, blessings of rest, of peace, and of your memories of happiness and of love. Love is what matters. And you have that.
I will light a candle in the window tonight, as you did for me.
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End Game
