So much for my plan: Liz's home now has a... - PSP Association

PSP Association
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So much for my plan

Kevin_1
Kevin_1

Liz's home now has a number of residents who are showing flu like symptoms.

Visitors are no longer allowed.

She is less than a mile away. I can feel her presence. I hope she can sense mine.

There will be an opening in this thick clouded sky. Until then I shall wait, not with hope, but with the certainty that when things are bad and they will, in time, give way.

My heart goes out to all, some I know are in harder places than us.

Standing together with you all.

Kevin

83 Replies
oldestnewest

Sorry to hear this news Kevin.

It sounds like you have a good relationship with the home from your posts.

It doesn't stop the worry or concern though about how our loved ones are & what they are feeling with these lockdown situations.

Allow yourself to express what you are feeling. Do you have helpful support to turn to?

Sending Hugs

Thanks Spiralsparkle

Good thoughts. Thank you.

As with many folk most support went out ot the back door when PSP came in at the front one.

Yes, I let my feelings out. Years of being a therapist brings the habit of seeking them out and working with them... roots and all. It's enough.

I get a lot very goodsupport here.

Y'know I had never really thought about why I liked the moon over the sea picture in my Avatar. When far out at sea, sailing alone in the dark, just the sounds of the hull splashing through the water, the glow of the compass and the stars above things can feel chilly and grim. Then the moon rises. It's not the dawn of a bright warm new day, but it illuminates the seascape and shines brightly on the white sails. Though it would be nice to have the sun, it is enough to bring some small joy.

I guess I am saying I can't have the Sun right now. So I'll settle for the Moon until it again rises.

Thanks for being there.

Warmly

Kevin

Thinking of you lovely man, she will definitely now that you are there in her heart, sending you a big hug you amazing man. Yvonne xxxxx

Hi Yvonne

You are such a brick... Do people still say that? Or, is it a rock? oops?

Anyway you are a wonderful person.

It's good to know you are there for us.

Hugs

xxx

❤️

I am very much into 'energy' as a holistic therapist.

Liz will feel you. Send your loving thoughts & intentions she will receive it.

We are all here for you.

Unfortunately a common factor that support bolting out the back door.

X

Hi Spiralsparkle

Such a fine thought.

Yes, I sometimes think that the energy we share and the energy around us is the major part of it all.

Thank you so much for reminding me. (Kow tow).

And, does it end when someone leaves the stage? I think not.

Thanks again for being there.

There for you too. You have had more than I think I could bare.

Warmly n hugs

Kevin

xx

No I believe their energy carries on once they leave the stage in a different form.

The current situation is really distressing & triggering my own pain. I think of Mum continually but I'm on high alert again wondering what is going on around her & knowing this could be the final nail for her if caught.

Hi SpiralSp.

Yes, I know, we are coming from the same place on energy. It's really rather beautiful :)

Yes, final nails etc... It's on my mind too. I try to accept what I cannot change with grace. Those things I can change I fight like a lion. This, I think, is what you are doing.

I have very deep respect for the paths you have chosen and, also, the great intelligence you've applied.

You have been much more of an amazing daughter than your Mother could have asked.

Warm respect

Kevin

Thank you for your kind words.

You will never know how much that last message has meant.

You have deep wisdom & knowledge.

Loving energy to you & your Darling Liz x

And your messages to me too... shared good energy. Thank you from here is innadequate.

xx

💚

Mtorres9235
Mtorres9235
in reply to Kevin_1

Wow

This situation is also occurring in Spain.

I'm still learning from you Kevin.

A big hug.

Luis

Hi Luis

Yes, Spain is in the news almost every day here.

I have been thinking of you.

I think I have learned much from you too my friend.

I guess a bicycle Jamon is out of the question. Such day's!

Hugs to you

Wishing you both the best of it.

Warmly

Kevin

A big hug Kevin and also luck.

Luis

Oh Kevin. I’m so sad and now you worry if PSP is not the predominant disease to think about. I’m keeping you both in my prayers. Please take care for you both.

Cuttercat

My thoughts and prayers are with you Kevin. I think often about the group of folks that post here and are so supportive to one another. This is a difficult time with another layer of concern. I am sad but grateful my love does not have to go through it. Hugs to all. ❤🙏 Kathy

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to kandk

Thanks for reaching out with support and prayers KandK

It makes a differenc.

Warmly

Kevin

Hi CC

Yes, the clock is ticking loudly.

Thanks for being there.

You have been stellar for us.

Hugs

Kevin

xx

I have to say I am glad Larry isn’t around for this. He would be so crazy which would only add to the “normal” stress.

I did get to the market today. Slim pickings. Managed to get most of what I went for.

Take care of yourself Jeff.

For me you are one of those who should wear their underpants over their trousers.

I will never forget the beauty of you and Larry.

Hugs

Kevin

I am so sorry Kevin. No words of comfort, there is none. Just sending a huge hug and lots and lots of love

Lots of love

Anne

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Heady

Thanks Anne

Hugs back to you too :)

xx

Dear Kevin

Yet another challenge - really PSP should be enough!!

You and Liz are kindred spirits she will feel your love if not your physical presence.

Look after yourself and I hope things will settle so you can return to Liz”s side

Love Tippy

Ps in reply to previous post Tippy as I am known to so many of my friends and family does indeed come from tea. - Spring Tippyleaf Assam !!

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Tippyleaf

Thanks Tippy

You look after yourself too. :)

Mine is a Keemun. :)

I didn't know you could get a Spring tips Assam. That must be rather nice - best of the crop I imagine.

Warmly

Kevin

I’m sorry to hear of your change in plan. We preceded you by only a few days here. I think it’s ultimately for the best; but it doesn’t make it easier.

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Ettavb

Hi Ettavb

Thanks.

Yes, I agree, it is for the best.

Wishing you and yours the best of it.

Warmly

Kevin

Thinking of you Kevin life is relentless at the moment but stay positive and keep talking to us. Sending you and Liz lots of virtual hugs.

Love Sarahxxx

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Hiking13

Hi Sarah

Thanks

I've been thinking of you and your running and walking. I expect you will find a way of dealing with it. I do hope so.

Keep talking too :)

Hugs to you and wishing you the best of it.

Warmly

Kevin

xx

So sorry Kevin to read this. As you and Liz have so much love for each other, although visits are halted, she will have you in her heart, as she is in yours. A very difficult time, keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Lots of love, Marion xx

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Nanny857

Thanks Marion

That's so sweet of you.

Hugs to you .

Warmly

Kevin

xx

Kevin,

We all love you both. You are a strength to so many of us. May you receive the same strength and comfort right now.

Keep keeping on.

Virtual hugs.

Juliet

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to JCRy

Thanks Juliet

The support from you and others here is so very wonderful.

Sending hugs and best hopes for you and Ian. :)

Warmly

Kevin

Kevin, I am so sorry that you find yourself in this position. As if you both didn't have enough to contend with. Keep sending your love and energy to Liz. She will feel it. I have been the recipient of your energy and love many times over the past times, so I know it works. Thank you. Hang in there friend. Praying for this to improve so that you and Liz can, once again, hold each others hands. God Bless you both. 🙏🙏😪😪❤️❤️

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to georgeg25

Hi georgeg

Thank you.

I read all of your posts. You are so supportive and wise for all of us here.

Thank you for your prayers.

Wishing you and your lovely Liz a good passage through these straits.

Warmly

Kevin

Thank you for your reply Kevin. I am still on the journey, sadly my Liz has finished hers but she keeps whispering in my ear to guide me. Take care. ❤️

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to georgeg25

Oh!

How did I miss that.

I'm so sorry.

I know what you mean about the whispering in your ear. There is a closeness to it.

Be well.

Warmly

Kevin

Dear man I'm sorry that this troublesome virus has stopped you visiting Liz, as usual you take a very philosophical view on the situation and your spiritual being kicks in to keep you both connected. I'm full of admiration at the love and loyalty you show toward her. I'm sure it is beyond difficult for you but somehow you make the best of what is possible for you.

Sending lots of love

Kate

Ps keep baking xx

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Katiebow

Hi Kate

Thanks lovely lady.

Yes, last night was a sourdough rye bread. Thank goodness I have the teeth for it! lol

The visits were tough. Seeing her in her depleted state, but still strong in her spirit and so very aware of everything. But, not visiting is harder.

We wait.

At times like these my old moody lover calls to me, the sea.

Sailing alone is such a wonderful way of just 'being', for me.

One day I might return to the sea. As with all old men, having done the 'big stuff' I will go for a simple open boat of my younger days and to the beautiful West Scottish coast where I had many years of wandering.

Just thoughts... At sea my spirit is free to be close to all of the ones I have loved and lost.

Yes, I am a little tearful

today, but not morose, good tears of love.

Time to shift these bones and do the chores!

Thanks for being there

Warmly

Kevin

xx

This must be the worst scenario for you - so close and yet so far. My heart goes out to you both. Try to stay strong.

x

Thanks NanBabs

Working on it :)

xx

Hi Kevin, I feel your pain as my husband is in A care home and it went into lockdown on Monday. His voice is so quiet it is hard to hear him when I am close to him, so if I phoned to speak with him it would be a one way conversation. I have posted him a card with a few words to let him know we are thinking about him. He probably is fine , it's family that struggle. Take care & best wishes.

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Caralime

Hi Caralime

Yes, Liz has the same voice thing.

Thanks! Why didn't I think of posting a card. doh.

Wishing you and yours the best of it.

Warmly

Kevin

Kevin,

Just when you think it can't get any harder. . . . . .!

Glad to hear that you have found a way to make peace with something you can't change. I feel like that is the key to taking care of yourself. Hopefully this will be over soon.

Take care,

Pat

Yes.

Thanks Pat

Take care too :)

Sending my prayers and love for the both of you.

Thank you.

That is so appreciated.

Wishing you the best in these times.

Warmly

Kevin

Your worst nightmare Kevin. The home where John was goes into lockdown today and I don’t know how I would have coped not being able to visit. The terrible thing as well as all outside entertainment is stopped . Just stay strong xx

Good to hear from you. :)

I hope all I going fairly well for you, 'despite'.

Yup, it feels to me like a wedge between us.

Thanks for being here for us.

Stay strong too.

PSP is a struggle, this is just something on top.

We will get through, eh?

Warmly

Kevin

Hi Kevin!

The nursing homes in Argentina were lockdown since Sunday noon. I saw my sister at evening as an exception. We have talked 2 meters away. I was deeply sad until yesterday. I could feel her solitude. But the life's law push me up, yesterday.

I can feel deeply your mood.

Warm hugs.

Elena

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to wear1947

That's wonderful that you can still get to see Lilly.

Things aren't so bad here. It's like waiting for a train.

Hugs to you

Kevin

:)

Now, all the Nation is waiting the President's press conference announcing the complete quarantine of Argentina.

Relax! I will have time to listen to your modern music advice.

Waving ✋

Elena

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to wear1947

Hi Elena

Yes, all we can do is Relax. :)

Waving warmly to you and wishing you well.

Kevin

Kevin my heart goes out to you & Liz... plus everyone else caught in this situation. Sending Vertual Hugs to All...Granni B

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Mottsie

Hi Granni B

Thanks :)

Take care of yourself.

Warmly

Kevin

HiddenThis reply has been deleted
Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Hidden

:) :) :)

Hugs to you.

xx

Standing right beside you Kevin.

Tim x

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to daddyt

Thanks Tim

Pull up a chair, this is going to be a bit of a wait.

Thinking of you my friend.

Warmly

Kevin

Dearest Kevin. My heart goes out to you too. Is Liz still mobile? A friend of mine was allowed to visit her husband in the garden as long as she did not touch him and another the home have set up Skype for residents. I know nothing is as precious as actually being with someone but these two things helped others in a similar situation. In the meantime I am sure that she can feel your presence if you can feel hers. Lots of love AliBee cc

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to AliBee1

Hi Alibee

Thanks for being here for us.

Liz can no longer speak and her hand squeeze signals are somewhat sporadic.

She is being kept in her room, they do not want residents passing it along.

Yes, Skype is a possibility. I'm holding off on that for now, as a member of staff will have to set it up and be there and they are sorely stretched.

I am going to put a card through the door later today.

Warmly

Kevin

xx

Kevin, both you and Liz have inspired all of us.

As stressful as this pandemic is, it has surely made me look back and appreciate all the little things life had to offer, even with Dans illness. He is commonly hospitalized every few months. I pray I can keep him home during this mess. I am in Wisconsin in the US. Hospitals are not allowing visitors and it is projected that they soon may be overwhelmed.

It’s great that you have such a good relationship with Liz’s caregivers. I’m sure they will do their best to remind her of your love and devotion. These times seem almost unbelievable.

Best of luck to you and Liz. ⭐️

Thanks Karyn

Yes, her care will be good.

Thinking of you and Dan. I hope all goes well for you both during these times.

Warmly

Kevin

xx

I am so sorry Kevin, I can't imagine how hard it must be for you and all the other people here who are in the same position. I know you don't need reminding the love you share is still there and holds you together whatever the world throws at you.

Kindest thoughts xxx

Thanks AJK

It's never a bad thing to remind me of such things.

I hope things are going OK for you.

Best to you :)

Kevin

xx

As if psp wasn't enough... So hard for you both to have this isolation and uncertainty 😩

Hugs for now Kevin 💗

Anne G.

Thanks Anne

I'm just so aware that I am the only one who sits and tells her the news, from home and of the world. Carers will sit with her, but they say little as they don't know what to say.

You take good care of yourself.

Life can get a little difficult and then a rogue peach tree grows out of the dung heap. :)

Hugs to you

xx

I sure hope its a FAST growing peach tree my friend!!

Big hugs ❤️❤️

Anne

I am laughing out loud - A lot!!!!

❤️

🤣

Such a brilliant idea.

Doctors could put an advisory plant at the bottom of their diagnosis.

"Mustard cress"

🤣

Thanks for the great laugh!

Hugs

My husband in his final days and at home. Worry that it will be so sad when he goes because the hospitals and all the funeral places are so overwhelmed and scared right now. I am hoping now we can survive long enough for a decent burial. I am at 20 % Lung capacity and taking care of him at home. Although I am glad he is home I am afraid of something happening to me or him at this time. Such a time of uncertainty. God bless us all! May we find our way together to a better, brighter world for or children’s children. Praying for you all!

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Mtorres9235

Hi Mtorres

I am so sorry to hear about your husband and your own health issues.

You are so strong to cope with all that is on your plate. Deep respect to you.

Thinking of you both.

warmly

Kevin

Thank you. I am so amazed at your wonderful, heartfelt comments you continue to share with so many. We are truly all connected and the gifts are given to us when we can care for one another.

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Mtorres9235

We are.

What a lovely observation.

Warmly

Kevin

Oh Kevin, I do hope that this is just a virus like the one that I have just had,over in 12 days.

Thinking of you both. Keep strong. R.

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to Robbo1

Hi and to you :)

I do hope you are doing OK.

Yes, horrible little virus... just won't shift.

I think it might be a Chinese knock off. Looks sort of right but not the real thing at all. I guess I got ripped off, again!

:)

Stay well.

Warmly

Kevin

xx

I have been a silent member of this amazing forum since 2015. All of you have been more helpful than you’ll ever know. My husband lost his battle with PSP last September, and as I’m alone through this pandemic I’ve been thankful that we didn’t have this complication to deal with. My heart is so heavy for Kevin and Mtorres especially. PSP was hard enough to deal with in itself. Then I feel awful being relieved he isn’t living through this. Grief is so confusing.

raincitygirl
raincitygirl
in reply to Keko

You aren’t the only one who feels that way Keko: I’ve said the exact same thing in my head (toMy deceased hubby) all through this covid business. It IS a strange process!

Anne G.

Hi Keko

Greetings!

Our heads are full of things we 'should' thing and do. That's the way we are as humans. It's completely reasonable for you not to want your deceased husband to be here and suffer.

I am hoping this is going to be the long awaited release my lovely Liz has been waiting for. Though I will miss her terribly when she is gone. She little no longer be suffering.

I wish you the best through this terrible time.

Don't be a stranger here.

Warmly

Kevin

xx

doglington
doglington
in reply to Kevin_1

Thinking of you both Kevin. I know how difficult those mixed feelings are. I often think at present how complicated it would be if Chris was still here.

Big supportive hug from Jean xxx

Kevin_1
Kevin_1
in reply to doglington

Thanks Jean

I hope things are going fairly well for you.

A big hug back.

xxxx

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