Very confused tonight

[-shelly26-]

Well, my husbands memory is quite terrible. Tonight he was sure I cheated on him because I was married prior to meeting him and had a little boy. The little boy he adopted but it was "news " to him. He had no idea our son wasn't his. He is so upset he won't speak to me and he texted his mother to come pick him up.

Of course, in real life, he absolutely knew. He dated me with my little son in the back seat and adopted him eagerly, knowing my former husband wanted him to be put up for adoption.

And its so sad tonight that he can't recognize himself in photo's. It's so hard to know what he does and doesn't remember. He seemed so full of memory tonight before the kids brought out the photos. He remembers some things.

I just really, really wish there were physicians that actually had answers. I don't know what's coming next. His Dr. left the LBD diagnosis with behavioral issues and catatonia, but the meds he was prescribed say that they should not be given to someone with dementia.

[Toddet]

That’s so hard for you Shelly. Hold on to the fact that you had all those lovely years together. Sending hugs ♥️

[Hidden]

Larry has episodes of delusions. He believes them. As of now they pass. Nothing to be done for them.

Doctors are useless dealing with neurological diseases. I have no expectations of them at this point.

[Dadshelper]

Remember this is the disease talking, not your husband. Dad had a few delusional events but they were about things. One time he swore up and down his bedroom curtains had caught on fire, even though he could plainly see they had not. The mind can be a mysterious thing.....

Ron

[Hidden]

One of the hardest things for me was to learn not to take such times personally and to remember the hurtful words were coming from the damage done to mom's brain. Sending you understanding hugs... Granni B

[Caro2132]

While these episodes are so frustrating and unsettling, it is of some ‘comfort’ for us to realize that it is the disease that is controlling the thoughts. Yesterday Mike was convinced there was a box in the hallway with booze to take to the weekend rental. (We were not going anywhere) I had to walk him up and down the hallway with the walker to show him there wasn’t. Then, I opened the drinks cupboard and went through everything in there, he was still convinced the box of booze was somewhere. Very upsetting for us both and honestly scary. What’s next ?

[-shelly26- in reply to Caro2132]

It is scary and heartbreaking. ❤

[SewBears]

You really have your hands full and I feel for you. Is this a constant worry for him that you’re having an affair or is it not frequent and he forgets about the accusations? I’m hoping for the latter but I have my doubts. I knew someone else who’s hubby also had LBD and they went through the same experience. It drove her crazy because she loved him so much and she’d never in a million years cheat on him. It’s sad. What would happen if you ignored the comments and just changed the subject? Please let me know how you deal with this because today I received confirmation that my husband also has LBD. He doesn’t hallucinate as far as I know. Maybe he won’t? No two people react the same so there’s that to ponder as well.

Xoxo from I SewBears

[-shelly26-]

I'm so sorry. There is so much emtion that comes from a diagnosis. Relief, sorrow, anxiety, grief and everything else. He had forgotten by morning but he gave me the silent treatment all night. I know it's the illness, but it still hurts. Not the words...the realization that he's not going to get better. On better days I let myself forget that he is sick. He can't walk anymore without great pain and effort and support, but when he's sitting in bed watching television its nice to just curl up next to him and enjoy the good moments when he recognizes me and will whisper in conversation and laugh about old times.

I never know where he is mentally. It can change on a dime.

[SewBears in reply to -shelly26-]

Please keep in mind that the silent treatment doesn’t necessarily mean that he is angry. He’s just in his own world. I often wonder where my husband’s mind drifts off to when he gives me that blank stare. I don’t bother to ask him anymore where he goes or what he’s thinking. He can’t answer me and oh my gosh it gets so lonely. I remember once when I thought he was mad at me because I was getting the silent treatment. I left him alone in the house and walked my dogs around the block to let off some steam. I felt so bad leaving him alone to sulk by himself. When I returned he had not moved. He was sitting with the same stoned expression and he never even knew that I had left the house! This is when the lightbulb went off inside my own head. I understood that he was on his own planet and he had no clue about my feelings or resentments or whatever you want to call it. I decided that this would be our new normal. But then... the next day he was back. He looked at me and smiled and he had no idea what I had been through. It took me a long time to figure this stage out. Once I got it, I could deal with it. This disease has a way of throwing us curveballs every day of the week. Live it and cherish it, the best that we can. Cuddling is the best medicine of all!

Xoxo from I SewBears