Dear All, this is my favourite picture of my beloved Dad with my daughter when she was little. He passed away on the 21st Nov but we didn’t have the funeral until the 13th Dec so it’s all been such a blur.
His passing was sudden although he has been diagnosed with PSP since 2013, although symptoms were definitely present in 2011. We were supported by wonderful District Nurses at home, for which i’ll Always be grateful as that was his wish. We had just been awarded CHC funding and had a grand total of 2 weeks and 2 days funded before he passed away. After a tense moment at the registrar when registering his death, we got agreement to put the cause of death to be PSP, this was so important to me.
My Dad was my rock, I utterly adored him, but I am very glad for him that he is no longer suffering. He never once complained or asked why me, but I found this whole journey completely heartbreaking. I’m dreading Christmas, but all the family is going to be together supporting Mum. I think i’ll Just about hold it together until we pour the brandy on the Xmas pud and light it, that was always Dad’s job.
This forum has been a life saver, I posted rarely, but read daily and avidly, I learnt more here than talking to any medical professional.
Thank-you to each and every one of you for sharing your lives, knowledge, pain and suffering, it so helps to not feel alone. To those who have lost their loved one in the last few years, keep taking every day at a time. To those still suffering and caring, I send your my heartfelt love, I know what you are going through. Much love to a wonderful community, Nicky x x
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Very lovely photo! Cherish the good memories and trying to keep a few of his traditions going is a good way to do that. This will be my first Christmas without Dad and I do feel down at times but I think about him being at peace and it helps me feel a little better.
Sincere and heartfelt sympathies to you, Nicky. I understand totally what you are feeling having had the same experience of a sudden death in the midst of the downward slide of PSP/CBD. I’m so sorry you will miss him this Christmas but along with you I’m glad he is now free. I hope Christmas comes to mean freedom for you rather than sorrow.
That is a beautiful photo of your daughter with her grandad, I'm sure he doted on her and she on him. I can see the love in their eyes. So sorry you have lost him to an evil disease but now he is free from its grip.
Thank you for sharing. Brings tears to my eyes. We suspect this may be my moms last Christmas...well certainly as we know her. The provisional diagnosis made just one year ago. Her first fall exactly one year ago tomo on Christmas day. And today wheelchair bound. Not able to walk. Slurred speech. Cant keep eyes open for more than a few seconds at a time. Life is cruel. I am still battling to get my mind around all of it.
Strength and courage to you and your family this christmas. I hope the tears shed are ones of happy memories. And that the heart ache lessens each and every day.
Sending love and warm wishes from a sunny South Africa.
Nicky, thanks for sharing the beautiful photo and your bitter sweet news. When my mom died in her sleep 2 months ago, after 2.5 years with PSP, I thanked her (course, I beat myself up about it later). It was a sad relief and I hadn’t felt like myself for a few months. The holidays won’t be the same, but the last few weren’t typical either, right? Find peace and honor his memory as best you can. Thinking of you and your family.
Sending you big hugs and I will be thinking of can you pass down the tradition of lighting the pudding maybe to your beautiful daughter ( with lots of help of course) Try and have a lovely Christmas as I am sure that is what your dad would want
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My Dad is now at peace
Rest in peace Dad
How do I make end of life decisions with dad without him thinking I just want rid of him?
