Hello All. It's been quite a while since I last posted. My Dad was diagnosed autumn 2013 and initially our main issues were Dad's rash behaviour, personality changes, choking and eyelid dyspraxia. As a family it has taken us quite a while to come to terms with the diagnosis and the impact it has on the future. My way of dealing with it has been to read up on absolutely everything and try to plan. My parents and my sister have taken the other route of being in complete denial and not wanting to know anything. I understand this as a coping mechanism but have found it very frustrating to manage. My sister and I have tried to split our roles, I live 2.5 hours away from my parents so can't see them day to day. I've taken on managing my parents finances and managing Dad's healthcare support to date. My sister does the popping in most days to check up on them as she lives 15 mins away.
After a year of holding onto the crossroads organisation info until my parents felt ready to accept the first step of a sitter they finally relented a couple of weeks ago. A good step forward to give mum a bit of a break from Dad. However I am starting to have doubts if this is really the right solution. I have had to tred so carefully that this is the most they would agree to but I think they need a lot more.
Mum is still utterly terrified and her confidence is shattered. She doesn't 't even want to make a phone call, let alone co-ordinate a diary for future appointments Dad will have.
I just think my parents aren't ready to look down the carers route but i think I need to understand what is right for them both. I wish I felt confident in my mum taking on a full carers role but I don't think she's able.
What I ideally need to find is someone who will help Dad with his increasing in continence, be watchful with him over his endless stumbling, watch his choking wycombe and yet be there to help guide mum and co-ordinate the many appointments she will need to think about.
I know I'm not being very succinct but frankly I don't know where to truly start. I have put a call into social services re their carers service but this will only be to support Dad. I think I need some sort if solution for BOTH my parents. I read all your posts daily and find them enormously helpful. Do you have any ideas for me? Thank you in advance Nicky x