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Prostate Cancer And Gay Men
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Recently Diagnosed pt. 2

Thank you everyone for your words. The recurring message in all your response is to relax, give myself some time and space to take in ALL information and don’t rush. I can do that. But for now (and that may change so I’m allowing room for this to evolve) I still think getting it out early is my best option . I have no interest in penetration so I think (and this is just my guess) that the impact will be greater on a TOP. And please, I am open to opposing opinions because only through dialogue and hearing other’s experience can we fully be informed. I did a 23&ME to see if I have that BRCA gene. It hasn’t arrived yet. My testosterone is also very high..(1300 & 1100...on 2 separate tests a week apart). Thankfully, I had a therapist way before this. I’m going to a support group tonight. And I’ve been consuming cruciferous vegetables especially broccoli sprouts. Please excuse my jumping from topic...still spinning. One thing is for sure: I have too many years and dreams to let this take me down.

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Decide not to decide. These provisional decisions will get in your way due to confirmation bias. If you lose your prostate you lose all the nerves in it that give you pleasure.

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bravo--and, just in case you're wondering, if you do have an RP, yes, receptive anal sex can still be quite enjoyable afterwards--it does NOT depend on having a prostate to be enjoyable

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Thank you for your response. I keep hearing everyone tell me to wait, not to rush and to relax. But nothing I’ve heard is dissuading me from my decision to have the RP. I am 47 and would like to be alive for a long time. Given my age, and family history , I am concerned about this developing and really want it out. My Penis will be rehabilitated and Even if it’s not, I’ll get the penile implant or whatever...but I’ll still be alive.

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Hi Gpinkk,

Feedback on sex after surgery:

I had surgery early April this year. 3 months after it I allowed penetration. I am versatile, but pretty happy being bottom too. So I can tell you of my experience. I didn't lose any pleasure not so ever. I even can tell you I actually find it more pleasurable now than before. It seems there are a lot of nerves in that area apart just from the prostate. I feel and allow longer penetration than before.

As for being the TOP part, 6 months after surgery tomorrow and I am having hard erections but they don't last long ... they come and go quickly as I get stimulated. So not yet able to penetrate. My doctor is advising me to give some more time trying the medicine and see how they work before I go for the injections.

All the best to you

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I hope your doctor isn't missing out a step. Hope you have tried, or will try a pump before going to injections. Using a pump can help reduce the damage to blood vessels and erectile tissue that occurs due to ED. The longer you go without some form of erection, the less likely you are to recover. I used one, not for penetration, just for its therapeutic effects. Twice every day. Persist with the meds, and pump. It's going to take time, up to 2 years.

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Thanks for this info. Is there a spy pump you use?

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Hi, the pump I used was a medical device rather than a "sex toy". I forget what brand it was and I'm currently not at home so can't dust it off to look. It was prescribed by a doctor in an erectile dysfunction clinic.

The ones you can buy online or in sex shops are said to be dangerous as they have no limiter on them. From experience they aren't as well made either and you can't be sure they'll fit. Fit is important. Medical ones come with a range of adapters.

If you google it, you will get lots of hits.

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Thanks Tim. I’ll ask my doctor if he would prescribe one. I’ll google it as well. Thanks again.

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Thanks Tim, Yes I am using a pump for some months now. Not as often as you I must say.

I also used it as therapeutic purpose... It worked, but it didn't give us enough stimulus to change from pump to sexual act.

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Are we talking about the same penile implants that you inflate in your scrotum? I’m really interested in learning more about those.

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Slow down!! Also ask your doc about "oncotype dx." it's a genetic assessment to determine likelihood of the cancer being aggressive (or not). Did you say that you had a MRI fusion guided biopsy? It allows the doc to target suspicious areas on prostate. If not, ask your doc about it for the next biopsy. Good luck with whatever you decide.

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The support group is a great idea. There should be a lot of people there with experience and worthwhile input.

Hope it was worthwhile.

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