Conquering ED: I posted this on one of... - Prostate Cancer N...

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Conquering ED

baw1955 profile image
15 Replies

I posted this on one of the other sites (Prostate Cancer and Gay Men), and looking for more exposure -- so posting here too.

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I'd like to revive this conversation thread for those of us who have joined "the club" (and Health Unlocked) in the last few months. ED is my last horizon to conquer. So blessed that incontinence and PSA are under control after prostatectomy.

My pre-surgery SHIM (Sexual Health Inventory for Men) was 24; it is now 5. Sadly, this is "severe ED" on the scoring system. Surgery was Oct 2018, almost six months ago. I take 5mg sildenafil at night. The 25mg "challenge dose" is totally ineffective. I stimulate blood flow to my penis every day (sometimes multiple times a day). Manual stimulation gets me to approx 50% firmness, 90% of length (pre-surgery), 100% girth. Pleasant dry-orgasm (less urine discharge recently) is experienced. I bought a $100 pump, use it occasionally -- when I try it with a good start on an erection my penis shrinks under vacuum, never do I get harder? No penetration with my wife since the night before the surgery.

A "right veil/left non-veil nerve sparing technique was performed" (Tall_Allen please explain). My wife is 100% supportive, love to touch and cuddle, and she occasionally achieves orgasm with my semi-hard penis pushing against her vagina. I'm thinking of shooting the magic potion via a needle into my penis as the next option. And, I do believe there is a huge psychological factor in sexual performance. Yesterday, I felt a glimmer of hope that something was happening "down there" during our foreplay. Also, any thoughts on porn? Not movies, just looking at pictures of naked women like we did when we were fifteen.

Please weigh in!

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baw1955
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15 Replies
dadzone43 profile image
dadzone43

It is really refreshing to have men like you share so openly. I am exactly three months from RP and left-side "sparing." Doing pump when I remember and had a trial of 3-P gel. That got me hard but with awesome pain in my perineum that caused me to need to lie down. Trial is over and I am waiting to hear from the Mens Center doctor abt next steps. It is important to remember that the surgery injured or destroyed the nerves that connect your brain's sexual pleasure center and your penis. Right now that "bridge is out" and may take two for those nerves to regenerate. That is why Viagra, etc. do not work so well now. I know we are all tired if hearing "give it time." But we have to give it time. Meanwhile my dry orgasms are bettef than no orgasms and I learn that there are many ways to make and have love.

Bcgkelly profile image
Bcgkelly

I tried the injections and while they are not 100% successful for me given your description of how much you have achieved I think they might work better in your case. The injection itself is not that bad when you get over the idea of doing it. Best of luck.

jimbay profile image
jimbay

I'm in almost exactly the same situation as you, so any other replies would be helpful. The ED doctor basically just says to wait. The nurses who perform the data collection all say "anyone with a pre-op SHIM that high really should recover".

Jeff85705 profile image
Jeff85705

It took me at least a year to get some erective ability (with ED drugs), so your situation might very well improve.

baw1955 profile image
baw1955

Just re-read my post.

CORRECTION: I am taking 20mg daily dose of sildenafil. The "challenge dose" is 5 pills, or 100mg (I mistakenly said 5mg and 25mg). Oops.

tkalaf profile image
tkalaf

Hi baw1955. My ED situation is nearly the same. I had my RP at 63. This was June 4th, 2018, ~9 mos. ago. I too had nerve sparing and was prescribed 'sildenafil'. My urologist suggested taking 20mg a day, to increase blood flow in the effected region. My prescription says take 1 to 5 (20mg) tabs daily for sexual activity. I've not taken it every day, but I have experimented with taking from 1 up to 5 tabs in the same day.

I believe taking 20mg each morning is great 'healing' advice! As for 'sex' advice, I've found it best to stagger consumption. If I take one 20mg tab first, wait and take two 20mg tabs say 30 to 60 mins. later I get better results. I don't get hard enough for penetration, but do feel myself growing a bit stronger. Of course, I don't hold out hope for a full recovery, yet it does feel good getting back some of what I've lost.

Now I do experience one side-effect. When I take sildenafil, I get an uncomfortable pressure headache in the front of my brain. In addition, pressure is greater when more tabs are consumed. It is manageable however, and my urologist says I should not be concerned. My remedy after 'sex', is to take 2 excedrins (aspirins) for relief.

Handdrummer777 profile image
Handdrummer777

Vety glad your incontinence and PSA are under control. As a guy who chose radiation over surgery, and who's also having some ED issues while approaching the midpoint of ADT, I offer sympathy and support for your situation. You are blessed to have a supportive wife who is clearly helping you get through this experience. There's one more thing I can offer you, and it's something that's been a huge help to me in maintaining libido and erectile functioning. I wrote a piece explaining what it is and how to use it. This is no joke: I ask that you allow me to send the document to you. I think you and yoir wife may be pleasantly surprised. We just need to keep our names out of the group context here. So, just as another group member has done, if you can give me an email address I will send you what I hope will be a big step toward ED recover. I won't conceal my name when I email you; I'm proud of what I'm offering. As you'll see, it's too ridiculously simple to try and market and make money off it. I'd rather just give it to men in a similar situation to mine who feel receptive to trying something fresh.

Handdrummer777 profile image
Handdrummer777 in reply to Handdrummer777

This reply is meant for baw1955. But others who might read it and be curious about the "something" that's helped me with preserving libido and EF can also allow me to send the instructional document.

jdfamily profile image
jdfamily in reply to Handdrummer777

Yea, send me that document also if you could, Thanks

Handdrummer777 profile image
Handdrummer777 in reply to jdfamily

Sure JD. Thanks for your interest, and give me an email address and I'll send you the instructions for making and using this really remarkable and effective device you make yourself.

jdfamily profile image
jdfamily in reply to Handdrummer777

Is there and email address I can email my email address to? Do not want it to share contact infor. Sorry.

Handdrummer777 profile image
Handdrummer777 in reply to jdfamily

Just use the private message feature and your email address will only go to me. I won't share it with anyone.

Discomushroom profile image
Discomushroom

Have you tried tadalafil? I've heard that it's number one alternative if sildenafil doesn't work. Take a look here tadalift.net/. And be sure to consult your doctor before taking them.

BrianF505 profile image
BrianF505

I’d be interested to know results from any of our brothers who’ve had the Penile implant.

Darryl profile image
DarrylPartner

Please consider joining this clinical trial malecare.org/restore

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