Hi everyone, I haven't been on here for some time but have always found this a safe and suppotive place to 'talk'. I'm not sure if you can help, or anyone can relate, but i'm desperately seeking some comforting support as I feel quite alone right now. I hope I have posted in the right place.
My journey began a few years back.... to summarise.... fertility treatment .... very traumatic birth resulting in large postpartum haemorrhage, left me very unwell for months. Needed surgery and caused severe postpartum depression. In the middle of my recovery I was told my chances of conceiving naturally were poor and I would need IVF if I wanted another. Hit me very hard psychologically. Cue covid, all treatment stopped including talking therapy which at the time unearthed some historic trauma that I am still trying to process.
Fast forward to now .... I actually fell pregnant naturally which was a huge shock, very unexpected and I was thrilled. It was a stressful pregnancy, I had a haemorrhage in my first trimester and my progesterone levels were low but I made it to full term and delivered in August via c section.
However, since then my baby has been diagnosed with severe reflux, was admitted to hospital at 3 weeks and has suspected CMPA. My now 3 year old has been diagnosed with autism. The process of going through the autistic assessment has been long and very tough. In truth we have had very limited support. She is a very poor sleeper, wakes me at 4am most mornings and can have me up multiple times a night. She rarely naps and its a battle to get her to rest. She has made some amazing progress in the last few months with her speech but we are also seeing some more challenging behaviour at home which is affecting her routines such as getting washed and dressed, potty training etc. Combine this with my baby who has severe regurgitation and vomiting with feeds and a suspected milk allergy. I am literally on my knees. I'm dreading going back to work as I will have no help in the mornings with my children. A 10 min wash can take an hour with my daughter.
On top of this, we had a family bereavement just before Christmas, my father in law is unwell and deteriorating quickly (mother in law not coping), my nephew (only a few years old) is having cancer treatment and is very poorly (family not coping). I am supporting as much as I can (but not local).
I've been running off adrenaline since giving birth but it's hit me very hard all of a sudden. We have no local family who can support. My husband is my rock but is a policeman and so his hours are horrendous with forced overtime.
I'm starting to feel quite down. I feel like I need to give myself a massive kick, but the continual sleep deprivation is really taking its toll. My daughter has been in the sleep clinic maybe 4 times now. Health visitors non existent in my area. Even the GP said they are (and I quote) 'an appalling service'. The autistic centre where my daughter was diagnosed has been terrible, very poor communication, we have had to go through PALS twice just to get some communication from them. So where do I go for support?
Saw my GP yesterday and ive been started on fluoxetine. But as my situation is complex, it's hard to convey everything in the 10 min appointment. I feel that because I am so incredibly lucky and very very happy to have two beautiful children, I feel embarrassed seeking help.
Now I feel an utter failure for needing medication š„
A little advice would be great right now
Bed wetting advice on behalf of my partner and his 4 year old daughter.
