Pregnancy after miscarriage how to remain calm?

[SarahL2]

Hello, I have just found out I’m pregnant. Just over 4 weeks. However, I have previously suffered a miscarriage and I am so worried that this will happen again. Do you have any advice for trying to stay calm and not stress? Thank you

[Desidel]

I’m in the same boat took me awhile to even want to try again. Had my miscarriage in August after trying to get pregnant for 7 years. I have two prior kids. Never thought I’d ever miscarry, but I’m 7 weeks. It’s like I’m waiting to miscarry again and I don’t want to get too exited about this pregnancy but it’s so hard to not worry and to be happy.. For three days I have been spotting... hate the feeling of not knowing but all we can do is wait. Prayers and good vibes your way. For the both of us!!!!

[Florencenightingale]

Hi, congratulations! Having had the same 2 years ago and now pregnant with IVF, the worry is there but I'm the type of person who tries not to worry about things I cant control. I've found putting it to the back of my mind and relaxing as much as possible has helped. Stress isnt good for you or the baby. With IVF we had a viability scan at 7 weeks and we booked a private on at 11 weeks due to anxiety which was a massive reassurance. I would definitely recommend a private scan if you are able, maybe at 8 or 9 weeks, just to put your mind at rest.xxx

[EJThompson2]

I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks in September. Then I found out I was pregnant again in December. I totally understand how you feel as when we found out I was pregnant again it was so different, we didn't want to talk about it to 'jinx it' and we felt silly telling people as we felt like it might all end again... Time went super slow and every little pain I was rushing to the toilet thinking the worse. BUT now I am 22 weeks pregnant with a little boy and all is well!

It's so hard to remain calm and think positively but it's important to remember that miscarriages are so common, 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. It doesn't mean it's going to happen ever again. My midwife told me there is no reason to think it's going to happen again and most people who have a miscarriage will go on to have a healthy pregnancy later (with the exception of those with fertility or health issues). I have a daughter who is 5 and I never dreamed I would have a miscarriage, I'm 24 and healthy but these things happen and each pregnancy is different and new.

I know it's so hard but try to take each day as it comes and know that each day the baby is getting stronger. We also booked a private scan at 10 weeks (I know you can't atm with coronavirus) But it gave us peace of mine. We just tried to think it's out of our control what happens and each day is a day closer. Good luck and congratulations!

[Seb9]

My first pregnancy ended in a missed miscarriage and when I got pregnant again I was sure that's what would happen again. I resigned myself to the fact that I'd have another miscarriage and I was fully prepared for it to happen again.

I thought that it was fairly positive that I could get pregnant and that the nhs would help if I had three miscarriages in a row so I was almost counting down till I could get help. I was very clinical about how I was thinking and I wouldn't get pleased about being pregnant only see our as a means to an end to get help with my fertility.

On my first scan I shut my eyes and waited to be told that I had had another missed miscarriage and then the sonographer started talking about the heartbeat and it wriggling round, when I opened my eyes there was a teeny tiny person waving at me. I honestly couldn't believe it. Even as the sonographer did all her checks and told me everything was fine, I couldn't let it sink in.

My little girl is now nearly 9 months old and pretty adorable.

I can't tell you not to stress about it because that's impossible or that it will be OK, but you have to do what gets you through, for me it was being very clinical and detached about it, but we all cope in different ways.

I wish you all the best 🤞

[KarlaRP]

Hi, I too had a miscarriage last May and just pregnant now (6 weeks tomorrow) . I think everyone who wants a baby and has a miscarriage is going to worry when they get pregnant again but try to keep positive and not worry as that doesn't help anything. Keep your mind occupied with positive thoughts. Prayers and best wishes for you.x