Happy and sad ....:-// don't understand y am feeling like this?...

[Buety]

Hi mums,... I think I just need pampering .... But am being really depressed over the last two three weeks.... I recently been off my bi polar meds... But since this pregnancy ave been blessed with great health... But still my two girls n my special need boy I still have to be there for them which no doubt I do 150% great parenting alongside hubby helps ... Which is great but ... With all that my hubby seems to forget that I need not to b forgotten or even a bit romance would help me ... But just sex isint everything which I do enjoy but that's not everything I feel for ... He is so cold behaviour in simple words I mean stressed/ worried for the house moving n his work n course Etc...voice tone is being so stern ... I feel he is being like a dad at times!!!. All our time together is disappeared ...:-((

Not even a hug after work or even not a cuddle at find of day.... He never seem to knw or remember to say something nice ..:/( which really depresses me n breaks me now I can't carry in being all emotionally strong.... I feel guilty spending on my self or kids....as he starts saying we need to our budget! Am soo tired of this.....

[joda]

Think men sometimes try to be too strong and forget what's really important. Sounds like maybe he needs some time out too - so the two of you and can just be together. also sounds like you have an awful lot on your plate. There was only two of us and I know how hard was for my mum with my brother (has aspergers) to be bringing us up as could never be anything but mum. Lead to quite a deep depression at one point, but she was on her own with no family network for support at the time. Is there no one that could take the kids for a day or two just to let you both get some rest bite and just spend the time together or even just an evening to talk things through? Sounds like you're a strong couple x

[Buety in reply to joda]

Hi joda

Yes I can leave children for evening or so,... But it's like I knw I need more time with him... As I really need him to understand how am feeling as I am always accommodating his stress or worry or feelings .... But he isint interested in my feelings. It's because the first five years of our marriage he was sort of nursing as to my bi polar when it was peak.... So I feel is fed up ... But shouldn't b as I physically always been indepenant from him and never put adequate pressure on him. But I dunno wat to do anymore ... We are strong but that's no good if internally it's sort ov emotionally being ignored ....

[joda in reply to Buety]

Not interested or not listening? maybe he needs time to himself? Just a day off work to get his head straight without any other worries? I know if things get to much for me I switch off - my psychologist (when was younger) called it a coping mechanism. Basically things had become to much so just went into automatic and ignored what everyone around me was feeling because couldn't deal appropriately with own stress. And he might have put his own mechanisms in place for coping with your bipolar he doesn't realise he's using? Its old but the best thing to do is talk. I know you are the one who really needs the support but maybe talk to him about how he's feeling and might make him realise that he's not supporting you. My OH had started pushing me away at about four months and was only when he had a blow out by himself that made us understand each other better and get back on track. Could quote a lot of psych babble at you but sure you'll have heard most and very little will have helped. Is only a suggestion - really not sure I could cope with three kids full stop, never mind everything else that's going on for you x