Tea time: I was trying to help out an... - Positive Wellbein...

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Tea time

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I was trying to help out an American contact of mine with an explanation of 'tea time' in UK a little while ago. And of course, it's like trying to explain what the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland is! Almost impossible to comprehend, even for some of its citizens! So as you begin to explain, the whole thing becomes more and more complicated.

So what is tea time? This was my explanation.

There's the 'come for a cuppa' at the very casual end. Maybe just an invitation for a neighbour or a friend to join you, when you've been out shopping. It might arrive accompanied by a biscuit or two lodged on the saucer or with the mug, but mostly suggests a fairly robust brew probably with some milk and/or sugar added to taste. And of course this is the kind of 'cuppa' which gets rolled out for every conceivable emergency and inconvenience.

Then there's the more formal afternoon tea. This might be a 'cream tea', involving scones with clotted cream and jam, or be stretched to a fuller afternoon tea with dainty sandwiches and a cake or two, alongside a scone. For these teas, the beverage part's likely to be brewed in a pot and served in cups with saucers. This is the time when other more exotic teas might be offered, such as Earl or Lady Grey, or lapsang souchong. (And of course those are generally offered with no milk).

Before moving on, it should be explained that there is debate about whether milk goes into the cup before the tea, or afterwards, and an even hotter debate about whether the jam or the cream is placed on the half-scone first. Lest war breaks out I shall move swiftly on.

After afternoon tea comes 'high tea' which you don't hear too much of these days but were common in my childhood and there was one aunt of mine in particular who went in for this kind of tea. As well as cakes, scones and sandwiches, the beverage is also served with some kind of warm dish, such as Welsh rarebit (a sort of cheese on toast), or scrambled or boiled eggs, but nothing substantial enough to merit being called a meal in its own right.

However, move to the north of England and there's another whole new scenario to learn about. For here, dinner is a lunchtime meal, whilst tea is a whole main meal eaten at what southerners call dinner time! It might not even come served with tea!

Whew! Even what should be the simplest of things can get so complicated! I'm thirsty now. I think I'll stop for a cup of tea!

Photo: K8, Unsplash.com

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49 Replies
bobbybobb profile image
bobbybobbAmbassador

I think you have covered it all wonderfully. You have given a very in-depth explanation that should be clear for everyone to understand. It is spot on. There is an old age art of tea leaf reading for a bit of fun, my gran use to do it. 😁🌸🌈

in reply to bobbybobb

Ah, yes bobbybobb, forgot about that one! Maybe because we use so many teabags now. But years ago I did know someone who 'read the leaves'. 👍😊

Lynd profile image
Lynd

Well that made me laugh.. When I was a child it was always dinner at mid day and tea for evening meal. Over the years lunch became the earlier meal.

Now we are at home all day it's just what do you fancy to eat 😁

in reply to Lynd

Yes Lynd, or in this house during lockdown, one meal which begins at breakfast and ends at bedtime! 🤣

FlowerPreciousLover profile image
FlowerPreciousLover in reply to

A long distance friend called the other day. When we connect, which is frequently, thank goodness, we cover the spectrum of topics and although on opposite ends of the U.S. political polls, she is the only friend I have who mutually agrees that we can "agree to disagree" and we do so civilly!

Last visit she said, "Alas, Joel and I are both suffering from Covid 15 but can't seem to get over it...." Eh??? What am I missing I asked? Replied: "You know like college freshmen 15; those 1st yr coeds away from home for the first time and putting on an additional 15 lbs the first year. " Learn somethng new every day! lol

I need to gain some extra pounds, so Callendergal, are you up for a long visit? Breakfast to bedtime sounds purrfect to me!

Hi

I love going out for afternoon tea but it's on the back burner at the moment because of restrictions!! When tea was brewed in a pot with loose leaves we put the milk in first but with tea bags it is put in last!! I don't even like tea, I went off it in my early 30s!!

Love and hugs Lynne xxxx ❤️🤗🌈💜

in reply to

Funnily enough Lynne, I drink more coffee than tea now. I still have my times of day for tea, like first thing in the morning, or with afternoon tea, but it has to be a 'proper' brew. No time for that pale and tasteless stuff! ☕️☕️👍

in reply to

I used to drink loads of coffee when I was still working but I have about 1-2 a week now and have to be really in the mood for coffee . Love and hugs Lynne xxxx ❤️🤗🌈💜

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Ha ha. I'm a northerner and the mid day meal was always called dinner and the evening one tea. My family wasn't posh so we only had common or garden tea mid afternoon but it was always accompanied by a biscuit.

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply to hypercat54

Yep same here although my hubby calls it tea and he's a Hertfordshire lad. We also used to call the evening meal supper. Tea also mid afternoon at weekends with biscuits or cake which was a treat.

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to MadBunny

Supper was what you had in the gap between tea time and bed. A piece of cake or a biscuit.

in reply to hypercat54

Yes, I remember having supper before bed when I was a child.

Hope you are well.

Love and hugs Lynne xxxx ❤️ 🤗🌈💜

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to

Fine thanks Lynne. Hope you are too. 👌👍❤ xx

in reply to hypercat54

Yes, I'm up north too. Where are you? I'm in Castleton Rochdale but I lived in Middleton until I got married. Xxxx

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to

Well I was born in Northenden in Manchester (was Cheshire then so I'm posh 😀). However I moved to London at 18, then to South Devon in my early 40's where I still live. I'm sort of cosmopolitan, but still support Manchester United and always will. 😁

in reply to hypercat54

I'm an Oldham fan through and through!! Xxxx

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to

Fair enough.

in reply to hypercat54

My Dad was a Utd fan. When he started taking my brother and then me to football, he wanted to take us where there would be less trouble and decided on Oldham!! I never liked Utd but now I have a soft spot for them due to my Dad who is sadly no longer with us and also our youngest son is Utd then Oldham. If Oldham played Utd then I would support Oldham!!!

Sorry for waffling on!!

Love and hugs Lynne xxxx ❤️🤗🌈💜

Now that sounds just about right to me hypercat54! 👍😊

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to

Yep sure does ✔👍

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny

Wow. Lots of variations. My friend, who is a northerner like me, drinks tea with her meals. So did my mum.Now even that's a bit too much for me😝

Your explanation reminded me of a tea towel I had which explained cricket. Now that is complicated😀🏏

klr31 profile image
klr31

My American friend thought that a cream tea was tea with cream in it, rather than milk! ☕

Karen x

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to klr31

Oh dear 😄

FlowerPreciousLover profile image
FlowerPreciousLover in reply to klr31

Hmmmm, you mean it's not??? laughing from across the waves!

klr31 profile image
klr31 in reply to FlowerPreciousLover

😁😁😁

S11m profile image
S11m

Yes... someone mentioned "American culture" in a conversation... and I said "Aztec, Inca or Mayan?".

Gillyflower18 profile image
Gillyflower18 in reply to S11m

That would be Native American Culture.

Sara_2611 profile image
Sara_2611

Clearly -seems to me your american contact has never been to the UK .To be fair -your contact may know many american traditions you re not familiar with

in reply to Sara_2611

I've actually no idea Sara_2611, as we are internet acquaintances. I've no idea what her conception of English 'tea time' is, but I sought to give her the fullest explanation possible. I'm pretty sure she has lots of traditions of her own. Thanksgiving's one good example. I know the bones of when, where and why, and many of the dishes traditionally made for the occasion, but there may well be things I really don't know.😁

Sara_2611 profile image
Sara_2611 in reply to

I have an internet friend who is from Kentucky .What we call tea time - (ie evening meal) they call supper

in reply to Sara_2611

Yes Sara_2611, I generally refer to our evening meal as supper. Any meal in the middle of the day is lunch, but dinner's far too formal for the sort of meal we generally eat at home in the evening. I always think of dinner as at least a couple of courses. When I was an army wife we frequently got invited to functions called 'fork suppers', which involved anything that could be eaten with only a fork, in an informal setting and not seated at a table.

Sara_2611 profile image
Sara_2611 in reply to

when I lived with my mum & dad it was always lunch time then tea time (even though we ate at about 9.30pm) -it was never known as supper

Now I live on my own -lunch is always lunch (somewhere between 12-2) & I start cooking about 5 pm & eating between 6-6.30 ) -this I call tea time. I have never called it supper

I love your posting by the way

FlowerPreciousLover profile image
FlowerPreciousLover in reply to Sara_2611

Yes, another difference across the waves from our British kin. In the some U.S. regions, the evening meal is called "dinner"; in others, "supper". I do not discriminate and will eagerly show up for either!!! Shoot, 'fork suppers' sound like fun too.

Sara_2611 profile image
Sara_2611 in reply to FlowerPreciousLover

are you from america -if so whereabouts

FlowerPreciousLover profile image
FlowerPreciousLover in reply to Sara_2611

Yes, Sara, I live in west Texas. How about you?

Are things as crazy school wise where you are as they are here? Impossible to imagine the times we are living, yes???

By-the-By, the cousin I stay in closest touch with and is three months younger than me also spells her name Sara.

Sara_2611 profile image
Sara_2611 in reply to FlowerPreciousLover

I am from the UK & live in a small town called ,Middleton which is in North Manchester

in reply to FlowerPreciousLover

I completely agree FlowerPreciousLover. Never mind what it's called! "How does it taste?" is the important bit! 🤣

What an excellent post Sue and that looks like a very enjoyable tea and cake. Now I always put the teabag in first, then sugar and finally the milk, this is my hubby's mug of tea☕

cindyching profile image
cindyching

Thanks for the lengthy explanation. Enjoy your tea time please.

Midori profile image
MidoriVisually impaired

I can tell you the reason for milk in the cup first. For those who couldn't afford real Bone China, but had to do with Porcelain, if you poured hot tea into a porcelain cup, it often broke, due to the heat shock, so putting milk in first buffered the cup from the heat shock. Nowadays, we tend to use mugs rather than porcelain, and the finer cups are tougher that they used to be.

Cheers, Midori

How really interesting Midori and that makes perfect sense! Only the other day whilst making a mug of 'instant' even one of my bone china ones suddenly split, top to bottom because of the boiling water from the kettle! 👍

blackbeauty99 profile image
blackbeauty99

The tea and cake looks lovely. I think you have explained this very well. I always enjoyed going out for afternoon tea and cakes but it will be a while before i do this again.

Hope you are well :)

in reply to blackbeauty99

Hi blackbeauty99, I'm doing really well thanks and I hope you are too. But I am missing afternoon teas. It was always one of my favourite things. So indulgent! Maybe soon! 🙏😊

Callendersgal, Tea Time was a wonderful read! As an all time British enthusiast and reader of history, I now realize that there is much, much more to the U.K. tea time forms than ever considered. Thanks for your wonderfully enlightening explanations!

Years ago, one of the first on the list for sight seeing musts our first trip to London was to experience high tea at Claridge's. It was made more fabulous because a group of pensioner war veterans dressed in their striking formal military uniforms were there at the same time. I was overcome with emotion because the men must have been in their 80's and yet they not only could still fit in their dress uniforms but were gathering as a group for tea. So much history written on the faces of that group.

More recently, Colin Thackerary, war veteran of the Royal Artillery won BGT's 2019, brought tears to my eyes not only for his amazing voice at age 89 but also for his formal military dress, choice of songs and loving tribute to his late wife. I was able to share video's of his competition with my dearest friend who was dying of cancer. His songs so applied to my decades long friendship with her. Because I couldn't visit, this was the next best thing.

Now I'm wondering if he might have been among that group of military pensioners having high tea at Claridge's.

Maybe it is my age that has me reminiscing more about meaningful times from the past. Maybe it is because there is more time now, because of Covid-19, to recapture memories long put aside or perhaps it is the connection we share in these support groups that bring added value. Whatever the trigger, I am grateful for the recall and for an opportunity here to share, learn and respond.

in reply to FlowerPreciousLover

Oh I'm so glad you enjoyed that FlowerPreciousLover and that it brought back memories of a fabulous afternoon tea at Claridges. That really is the creme de la creme of afternoon teas!

Those veterans were Chelsea Pensioners who have all given long service in the military to gain their places in their communal home, known as the Royal Hospital Chelsea. I bet Bazzak could tell you much more than me about it, but as someone with a military background myself, I do know that each one has to have given at least 12 years of service, or have a disablement pension awarded because of a disability gained during service. They have to be soldiers or non-commissioned officers, not commissioned officers.

They do, happily have a pretty good life with all sorts of invitations to social events. All are extremely proud to be Chelsea Pensioners. I wonder if Colin Thackeray was there that day! I loved that he did so well on Britain's Got Talent!

I think that nostalgia plays an ever increasing part in our lives as we get older. I think we look for the security of our past because the world is ever changing and little by little we become fish out of water with every day that passes. And definitely covid19 has increased that feeling. It's so odd for all of us, and maybe even more difficult to take in older age, I think!

FlowerPreciousLover profile image
FlowerPreciousLover in reply to

Thank you, Callendersgal, for sharing more info. on the Chelsea Pensioners. Their pride of service in their lovely uniforms was so evident and touching.

I only wish we in the U.S. so honored and cared for our disabled veterans as well. Our Vietnam Veterans came home to shameful treatment. So many returned with physical and emotional wounds that many were unable to return to gainful employment and in far too many cases, ended up homeless. Our country has much to be ashamed of but for those who "have stood in for the rest of us" in military service deserve the best of treatment and shamefully, too often receive far too long waits for gov't. provided Veteran Admin. (VA) medical treatment. VA clinics and hospitals are located sporadically throughout the country and some too far to access. Shame on us!!

in reply to FlowerPreciousLover

The U.K. hasn’t always been very empathetic to its veterans either FlowerPreciousLover, with the exception of our Chelsea pensioners. It is beginning to be better now. I do remember how difficult it was for the veterans of the Vietnam war. I think maybe most nations could learn to look after those who bravely fight in their defence, a good deal better 🙏

SadieHU profile image
SadieHU

What a great explanation Hidden !! I often struggle to explain this to my American friends and family, and even worse, my husband is northern so if he says tea and means dinner, everyone gets confused! I love the way you broke this down and I'm going to save it so I can use it the next time I run into this issue. Thank you so much!

in reply to SadieHU

Oh I'm glad that was helpful for you Sadie! It's only when you start to explain that it becomes obvious what a complex thing it all is here!😁

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