Three years since diagnosis, months of sick leave, two failed attempts to return to the job I loved and finally, enforced medical retirement!
BUT FINALLY......today I was up at 6.30am and out of the house by 7.45am to be back in my old Nursery class, but not as a teacher....... as a volunteer helper.
School has been covid free (as far as it's humanly possible to tell anyway) since Easter, so I made the decision that the time was right to do what I've been desperate to do for months.....and that's simply to be back working with the children.
Lots of ventilation, the 'outdoor classroom' Early Years provision and other covid-safe protocols all led to the decision I made. The Head (and some colleagues) were to inform me if any staff or pupils reported positive tests or covid-like symptoms but everything seemed to be about as good as it could get, so all in all I felt I was probably just as safe in school as I am when shopping in the supermarket!
It was absolutely wonderful! ❤ As soon as I walked into the classroom, it felt like I'd never been away and I was once again where I was meant to be...... the main difference being though, that I had no responsibilities, no heavy workload, no pressure and no demands on myself to be well enough to attend the next morning! I wasn't rushing around like a headless chicken and I wasn't the one lugging heavy boxes of resources everywhere. It was all a completely different experience to the times where I was trying to sustain a five day teaching week whilst coping with PMR!
I wanted to share this with you all because even 6mths ago...and without the covid risk..... this would not have been possible for me. I have low energy, weak muscles and I'm constantly fatigued, but with some sensible 'precautions' in place and the knowledge of how to pace myself, it would seem a few hours in school once a week is not an impossible achievement.
I know that for some, even this would not be possible but for others, yet even more may be achieved.
It's all about those little 'wins', where every achievement however big or small is a triumph! So when you're feeling sad about how much life has changed, just remember that patience, time and knowledge is the recipe for progress and most of us will eventually get to achieve our desired PMR/GCA goals.
For me, today has been uplifting, memorable, joyful and 'possible'. I'm fully aware though that my circumstances could change in an instant again, but for now I'm just happy and thankful for 'today'!
Written by
Kendrew
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Such wonderful news, so very happy for you. From reading your posts over the last two years I appreciate how difficult it was for you to give up your teaching. The young children are so very fortunate to have you around. 😘
Sometimes Constance you don't know you have had one till you look back. One of my was when I met PMRpro - did I know at the time..............not at all.
Of course! Two of mine were when I heard of two ladies that were more help than any rheumatologists I had visited - and to think that ten years later I would still be in touch with those ladies. After all, PMR only lasts two years!!!
Really pleased for you. I’ve been following your progress from your start, as well as your excellent posts. I can imagine how much it means for you to be back in the classroom.Good luck, and long may it last.
Thankyou ❤ I made sure I had an easy few days prior to today, and I've nothing much on for a while...... the most energetic thing I'll probably be doing over the next few days is cheering Sam Ryder on in the Eurovision Song Contest!
I know...I love it and whenever I hear it I end up singing along.....or rather, screeching along!! It's a little 'high' for my vocals chords! It definitely gives me a boost and makes me feel good though.
Kendrew - thank you so much for sharing this today. Not only am I happy for you, you have also reminded me to keep going forward, and to not dwell on how much life has changed. xo
So pleased for you Kendrew! It's good for your mental health as much as anything, the fact that you're able to be there and feel you're almost back to normal, without all the planning etc on board. I know what it's like to teach nursery/infants having been in that position myself a few years before PMR. I couldn't sit on their little chairs now, getting down then back up from those was always a challenge even before the pains in legs started! 🥴 but the children were joyous and made it all worthwhile. Enjoy!
How absolutely brilliant. Able to do what you love is really important for mental health but it’s also important to be able to stop. Perhaps we are fortunate that PMR/GCA tends to affect older people who even if not yet retired are not at the start of busy careers etc. PS love your bio/profile showing your PMR journey. I recommend it to all new members.
What a lovely uplifting post to read this morning Kendrew. So pleased for you. Made me get up early and look forward to the day…….and the sun is shining!!
Uplifting post thank you for sharing your joy and success. may I say that even though we’ve never met I now have this wonderful image of you at work 😀😀😀
Hahah! Well if it included a lap full of sand, playdoh stuck to my bum and a head bandaged like an Egyptian mummy (doctors/nurses role play corner!!)...... you got it right!😆
How wonderful for you to experience a lovely day with the children, without the full responsibility of a class. Also to know and accept that you may constantly have to review and still continue to pace. All the very best to you Kendrew in the future. 💐
Thats fantastic news Kendrew,so there is light at the end of the tunnel. We can all have this hope , thanks for sharing and giving us this brilliant news . 😀
Wonderful achievement Kendrew, have loved reading your posts, always positive, sensible and uplifting! The children are blessed having you back, they will continue your “healing “ in a different way. Every happiness.🙏😘
Oh Kendrew, we are all just SO happy for you. Well done! Live each day. Take each moment as it comes. Pace yourself and remember to say "No" if necessary! I've just spent the afternoon with my two little grandchildren age 4 & 2, readng books and helping them thread beads. I call them my "Happy Pills" so I can only imagine what this has meant to you. Keep it up.......
From one teacher to another, I can imagine your joyfulness. Wonderful news, the children and parents are fortunate to have a teacher who loves her work, back in the classroom, no matter in what capacity. 🥰
I'm soo pleased for you Kendrew! I worked with children over 40yrs in a variety of settings but due to PMR miss the fun . Hope to do something eventually once mobility improves. So I enjoy visits from our youngest g'son age 7 1/2! Well done! Xx
I'm sure you'll achieve that too. PMR can be incredibly debilitating at times but I've found a healthy respect for both the condition and the medications involved does lead to a degree of success in achieving small (but still significant) milestones. Good luck. 🙏
Thanks Kendrew. Agree small steps. Had PMR 4yrs end of May. I just love chatting to children! I have a dear friend whose daughter has a little girl 4yrs & baby boy arrived in Jan & they've made lunch dates with me once a month so I can watch these 2 grow up! It's been a real privilege apart from choosing b'day gifts for them! I was in a Cof E Nursery 8yrs long time ago loved it! So I can imagine how much joy you re getting! Ab fabulous!! My final post was 15yrs in Special Needs assistant & had my own class for a couple years. Again loved it! Take care take it easy much love xx
Not a chance of that happening...that would be like cutting off my life support system. You all mean too much to me and this is also my 'safe place' to go to when I'm troubled with my PMR.
Kendrew that is lovely news, Im so very pleased for you and I can sense the happiness and joy in your post. Those children are so lucky to have you too.
It's amazing how just being able to spend a morning in Nursery can make me feel so much better. I think anything that brings a person joy is a tonic and will help with any healing process..... certainly on an emotional and psychological level.
Thankyou.I think everyone should definitely be hopeful.....we're all making progress. Sometimes the steps are quite big ones but sometimes the steps are so small that we don't actually recognise them. Hope is simply being able to see the light when surrounded by darkness.
So thrilled for you! Doing the “work” we love definitely enriched our lives. A great example of making the necessary adjustments to ensure success. Hope it continues to be meaningful for you…and a wonderful gift to the children.
Reading your post has been a lovely encouraging way to start the day! So happy for you and for all the children who must be thrilled to have you with them. It helps us all to remember that there is light at the end of (and during) the “tunnel” of GCA! I have always appreciated your helpful advice in your posts and now can celebrate with you even more!
Iam so excited for the news that you are able to add such joy back in your life.This is an inspiration to us all that things can get better!!So happy for you.Enjoy cause you have earned it .
I truly believe that although some of us may have to spend quite some time living with this condition, its possible for everyone to achieve some degree of progress. It may be small for some people but it's still a step in the right direction.
Well done!!! Like you l did work in nursery and reception as ta but found full time too much. After 4 and half years of PMR and still struggling to reduce steroids my work moved me to yr 1 then yr2 and l only work 4 mornings and one full day. This l found so much easier, less bending than with little ones. At least l can continue with the job l love. Hope all continues to work out for you.
Thankyou. It's people on here though that have inspired me to work towards making all the necessary 'adjustments' that have enabled me to reach this point. I'm so grateful for all the advice and support I've personally received and to have ignored or dismissed any of it would have been both irresponsible and disrespectful to all the people who took the time to respond.
That is awesome! Even though it is volunteer and as you stated no pressure, etc., there is a great feeling being able to get up and go (early hrs) and such a wonderful place to go to where kiddos are present! I volunteered as a librarian years ago when my oldest was a teacher at a Montessori here in US. I loved it and the hugs aka present moment memories from those kiddos meant the world! Since diag. May ‘20 whenever I challenge or push myself I do so with others afflicted with PMR on my mind knowing this is debilitating/struggle is real and so many cannot get out of bed, been there done that! It may not be a good day but there is something good in everyday! 🙏🏼
This is such wonderful news. I am sure the children are gaining as much from you as you are from being back with them. Very best wishes for continued improvement in your health.
Oh congratulations Kendrew! What a joyous moment for you! I worked in preschool development for 25 years and the children , some of them already out of college , have continued to check in with me and share their careers with me. The impact you gave in their lives is tremendous. Kudos to you for returning to share your wealth in a new fashion! It can be done sensibly 😃
I am so pleased for you and for the children. Hats off to you, you stuck it out, adapted and you got there 👍 Long May it continue (but don’t overdo it).
Thankyou. I'm definitely going to manage this at my pace and will do my best not to jeopardise the progress I've made health wise. This can be an unpredictable condition though so I know I have to go slow and steady.
Just a quick hello..to say BRAVO! It takes strength and courage to return to work. You are clearly amazingly resilient. Your words will give hope to many.
HELLO back, and thankyou. I haven't always felt resilient though... definitely not in the early days of PMR, and it's taken 3yrs to reach this point. In some respects there's a world of difference between going in as a paid member of staff and going in as a volunteer helper but the important bit that remains the same, is the opportunity to spend time helping, educating & enjoying being in an environment I love with the children that I also love. ❤
That’s great news Kendrew. It must be wonderful to be back with the children. You are an inspiration to us all and you certainly give me hope for the future.
Thankyou for your kind words..I think once you set yourself realistic expectations and accept your limitations, so many 'opportunities' begin to emerge.
My particular PMR health concerns meant that realistically I was never going to be able to return to the classroom as a teacher, but as a volunteer helper, this is now possible. Its different, but equally rewarding and fulfilling.
Just catching up after a lovely few days in France - and so pleased to read this news and all the super comments! It’s all too easy to get dragged down by health problems (and all the endless meds!), but to pick up an activity as you have done gives glimpse that life might be worth living after all! Bless you!
Kendrew, I just saw this and had to add my thoughts of happiness for you. It is amazing how much adrenaline we get from doing what we love. I can only imagine the joy you get from interacting with the children.xo Good for you! and lucky children. 💕💕xo
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