Greetings to all VIP Members of The PMR and GCA Pred Club and / or Pred Club Zero - whichever side of the fence you sit on, used to sit on, want to sit on, never sat on in the first place, or might sit on one day. All I can say is, if you’ve got this far, you’re doing well…
Ok ok OK! So I was recently re-reading Robert M. Persig’s critically acclaimed 1974 novel ‘Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance’ and it occurred to me to run his Existential Dilemma past my trusty Companion and Manservant, the venerable ‘Tedski’, whom some of You Lot might have heard of in my tales from ‘Behind The Sofa’.
Since Tedski has accompanied me on my 3 year PMR Journey, I thought he’d be a good sounding- board for my Persig-style thoughts about how best to survive PMR, The Preds and all that goes with it / them. Here’s a transcript of our conversation last Saturday evening:
MB: Ted, I’ve been reviewing my spreadsheet data analytics and have found an anomaly in the statistically adjusted correlation between cumulative Pred dosage, periodic incremental tapering gradients and a seasonal aggregation of reported PMR symptoms according to an acknowledged Mean Distribution Curve. There appears to be a 2.5% Randomly distributed Variability across the board - what do you think?
Ted (shrugs shoulders impatiently): Never mind all that MB. I’m off-duty after cleaning the Limo for the second time today. Just pass the Fags (cigarettes) - I’m gasping for a smoke!
MB: But Tedski, I need to make some rational sense of my intricately constructed Hypothesis about the Science around PMR management and Pred tapering. This is Medicine after all, and Medicine is a Science - Ok?!
Ted (casually lights cigarette and exhales slowly): ‘Boss’, listen: I know you want to make sense of all this with your Digit Head on. But you’re going about-it the wrong way. Just Chill. Don’t ‘over-think’, and go with the Flowski. There are some things in Life that we can’t understand or control - including PMR and Pred tapering regimens. Now, how about a glass of the Red Stuffski?!
MB (now irritated): Listen-up Schmuck, I employ you as a ‘Yes-Man Tedski’ - don’t go against me. You’re a Smart Cookie. Cut me some slack and stop ‘conflicting’ me! No discussion, no Red Stuff. END OF! I DEMAND Loyalty from you…!!!
Ted (sarcastically): 'Boss', wind your neck-in. If you want a Scientific explanation for 100% successful PMR Pred tapering, go hang-out with some ‘proper’ Scientists for the next 20 years - or maybe forever? Now, pass me the (TV) remote, I want to watch Sky. It’s the ‘Ladies of a Certain Age International Mud-Wrestling Championships’ tonight. I’ve got a large bet on even larger my sister, Olga. She’s a Champski!! And Gimmee Gimmee GIMME some more Red Stuff NOWski!
MB (now enraged): Look Ted, if you can’t take this seriously I’ll…. Grrr… er… (impulsively hurls a signed copy of the ‘Write Me Funny..’ book at Tedski from in front of the sofa).
Ted (defiantly): Ouchski MB!!! But if that’s how you’re going to play it, I have the only spare key to your treasured Limo, and also your personal ID and credit card details. I fancy a bit of an adventure - I could probably get back to our home town of Slovensk in a couple of days - if there's enough fuel in the tank? Olga likes Limos - she imports and sells them for (q.) ‘a Goodly Prrofeet’ to her friends there!
Ironically, despite the initial Conflict between myself and Tedski, the remainder of our initially gentle Philosophical Conversation is resolved by a massive (and mainly comedic) punch-up between the two of us lasting well into the evening.
That said, the ensuing Fracas was conducted by Queensbury rules on both sides, with regularly agreed breaks for top-ups of The Red Stuff, Fag (cigarette) breaks and the self-administration of Olde English Pork Scratchings to keep-up each side’s Fighting Strength. And not forgetting, the odd ‘peek’ at the ‘Ladies of a Certain Age… etc’ on Sky TV by both parties in between the eventually friendly hostilities.
So, all considered, and as we say in the UK’s west country, ‘Job’s a Good Un’ ;-
My conclusion(s) to the ‘Zen and The Art of…’ Question?
Try not to take it (or yourself) too seriously in the process of ‘Seeking to Understand’. Yes, there are some things in Life - and with serious illnesses like PMR and GCA, especially - that we want and need to rationally understand and / or seem to have some relative control of in the management of them.
At the same time, there are some things that we can’t understand and / or control - even with our best efforts and the currently available research and knowledge about these things. We can only live in Hope…
So: we are often dealing with our personal ‘Zen and the Art of Paradox’ at the same time as living with a Chronic illness. I.e. Ambiguity and Uncertainty in how to most effectively manage our PMR / Pred tapering process even with the best information and intentions - and also how to Cope on this often unpredictable Health Journey.
Perhaps Tedski is right? I.e. ‘Learn to Chill and go with the flow’? He might just be on to something.. ;-).
My money’s on ‘Coping Strategies’ as one of the best Survival Mechanisms - and having some Fun in the process must come into the equation too.
Either way, Best Wishes All, and try to keep smiling on the Journey
‘Uncle’ MB :-)