I'm scared how my life is gonna end up

I've bin in pain for a year with my ribs. Now I feel sick can't walk far.lost my job.gp has given me drugs. I can't live like this. I'm 30 years old.

14 Replies

  • Ask your GP to refer you to an NHS pain management clinic to help you cope better.

    My local group also has a social group that meets every week, for support, tea & sympathy. Anyone can join. Your GP should have a list of services like this for the area where you live.

  • I don't support I want my lifeback

  • As does anyone with chronic pain or other long term health conditions.

    My suggestion is realistic, as the NHS hasn't yet developed a magic wand.

  • Unfortunately it sometimes happens that life can't go back to normal. Accepting that is the first step to managing the pain.

    Pain Management clinics do a full assessment of your pain, your medications needs and give strategies for learning to manage it.

    I know it's hard, very hard accepting all this but that's where support groups and forums like this one come in.


  • When you get ill, and it is chronic it is another world. You can feel like life is over, and in a way, the life you once had is. Now you, as many of us do, wish we hadn't taken our life for granted! Nobody ever knows what will happen when we get up in the morning, car crash, accident, losing a loved one, heart attack, being runover by the bus - or even winning the lottery... none of us know how long we have on this earth, even those with terminal illnesses, get a quote of life expectancy which can be wrong. For a time you WILL panic, you will GRIEVE the life you had, and the life you could have had without the pain etc, but if you work at it, you will also realise that life is not over, it is just different, not ideal, far from ideal, involving choices which are not real choices, and ones you don't want to take, you will feel lonely, useless, exhausted, frustrated, angry, and a whole host of emotions which can change daily. I like you have lost my job over my illness, and that was hard for me. I've had to give up much more too, friends, social life, even food, as I can't eat normally. Outwardly I look normal, despite being 5 stone. I disguise my ill health, wear lots of layers, smile and joke, and sound intelligent and educated. I am clean and tidy and well, normal. you will get to that point. You will lose friends along the way, work out who you can trust and not, who will be supportive or not, which doctors help, which don't, find out what makes you willing to get up in a morning, and fight against those demons that make you want to stay in bed and give up. You have a huge replacement job now, to fight your way through the maze of the NHS and dealing with chromic illness, so you need to be ready for the fight and start. These sites are good to air or vent. Like you I hate sympathy and am not for cake and coffee mornining with fellow sufferers (not that I could even have the cake and coffee!). There are days when I feel guilty for being the way I am, but I challenge myself each day, even if it is making sure the house is ship shape, or I do the cooking for my husband after he's been at work all day. My health will not improve, yours might, and I worry for the future so I don't think of the future, I deal with each day. I hope you heed my words and that you reach a better place soon and start the journey to better health, even if that is not good or ideal health. I don't know what your diagnosis is, but I wish you well.

  • Hi Rockstar66200!

    I agree with DISC, it’s a terrible place for you to be right now and those of us on this forum have been in very similar positions as you.

    I too lost my job, a career that I’d spent 13 years building and was in a dreadful place for a long while. I can only give you the same advice, use what little energy you have to get through all the doctors, the DWP and everything else you’re faced with and then allow yourself the time to rest, recover and grieve for the life you no longer have. It’ll take a long time to get through it all, I started my chronic pain journey in 2014 and whilst my mood is better these days, last year was horrific with so much darkness and depression. Please don’t be afraid to be honest with us, your family and your doctors, you are trying to come to terms with a very difficult thing. You want your life back I know, so did I (when I’ve had a crappy day, then that’s what’s always in my head as I scream my head off) but if that can’t be possible then you have to try and make a new one somehow.

    Please make sure you’re referred to a Pain clinic; they are the people who helped me the most I feel. They sort out your meds, try and get the best management for your Pain but also work on your psychological issues too. They have been a huge support for me and have helped me to see a way forward whereas before, I couldn’t see anything but darkness.

    This forum is full of people who truly understand what you’re going through so please visit as often as you need to? I don’t post much these days but when I started my pain journey, I found huge support from the people here and they helped keep me going.

    Take care my lovely ❤️

  • I want my life back. The NHS don't care.... if I Ant gettin my life back which I don't think is gonna happen.i will end my life. I'm not enjoying my life stuck in this chair in chronic pain when should be building a career and enjoying myself.....

  • Rockstar66200, please don’t say that, it really isn’t the end. I know how you’re feeling because I’ve been where you are, I’ve been suicidal at the prospect of a lifetime of pain but you can get help like I did and I know you feel that it’s not worth going on but it is. Please tell someone what you’re thinking, you have to reach out and get people around you to listen.

    It’s a very tough road to travel but you are are not alone; we understand what you’re going through and we are listening ❤️

  • Where do I get help from?? I've gone to the gp all they do is give me pills. I have no life. Talk to my gp will only make it worse I'll end up in a funny farm for the rest of my life

  • I know how you feel. I have always been an emotionally strong person. The one that people tell me their problems standing in line to pay for gas, etc. Well here lately in the last year after having a total knee replacement and suffering thru that I really did hit a dark place and my dr would have liked me to go into an inpatient facility. I have a child at home so that was not an option. I worked thru 2 months of physical therapy and each day felt a little more able. I did drive at 2 1/2 months, but shopping trips still bother me after a year as does some housework.

    In talking to my pain management Dr I broke down last month dealing with degenerative arthritis, Fibromyalgia, and the need for a spinal fusion due to chronic sciatic pain. He said he recommends counseling and anti depressants/anxiety Meds. Which I am on. I sleep a lot and feel guilty for that, but if I am sleeping I am not in pain.

    Chronic pain sucks. Get yourself into a pain management clinic and it will help. Not sure what your pain is, but everybody who goes to the clinic is there for treatment or a diagnosis. It surprised me how much people are suffering of all ages. God Bless. Write anytime. There are always people here who care and will listen. Do not let yourself stay in that dark place. Talk to somebody, adopt a pet , go to your local park and oh yea music is wonderful therapy.

  • Hi Rockstar

    Sorry to hear of all your pain and suffering. This is dreadful, that it also cost you your job as well.

    A year? It's about time you had a diagnosis isn't it?

    What investigations - blood tests, scans has your GP arranged? Have you been referred to a Specialist yet?

    Can you recall anything that happened or changed just prior to onset of pain last year?

    Did GP just give you pain drugs or ever explain what and why they were prescribed? They clearly aren't working are they? Is there another GP at the practice you could see. Have you ever had blood tests to check your Thyroid gland? Or blood tests to check for inflammation such as CRP (C-Reactive Protein) or ESR?


  • ps

    Reply 2

    Hi Rockstar.

    I only just read all your replies. Just seen your post today. How are you feeling now?

    I was in terrible pain and getting nowhere with a GP - think she thought I was a Hypochondriac. She wouldn't refer me to anyone. So I stopped seeing her.

    Long story short. I was practically housebound with pain and symptoms, for over 5 years after our car was written off. Going to shops & Church on a mobility scooter.

    I have Hashimoto's Autoimmune Thyroiditis and Hypothyroidism. Was late diagnosed in 2011. Had to diagnose myself first. Well it was a lovely woman on a Thyroid helpline who diagnosed me over the phone. More recently (this year) I found out that I have Folate deficiency and Vitamin D insufficiency. Still don't think I'm fully diagnosed yet!

    Since starting Levothyroxine in 2011, I have my life back. But it has been a long painful journey. I lost 2 good jobs to ill health. I lost Disability benefits because I was too ill to cope and had no one to help me.

    I now have to cope with permanent medical conditions (won't go into detail now).

    You have a right to ask for a diagnosis and prognosis. Pain isn't natural. Unless it is caused by an accident, there must be some condition causing it don't you think?

    Reading your post it seems that you haven't been given a diagnosis yet?

    Ask your GP for blood tests also to check nutrients levels of Vitamin D, B12, Folate and Ferritin. Look up the list of symptoms of deficiencies in each of these on NHS Choices. See how many you have, write a list of your symptoms and take to GP.

    Do you have any other symptoms you haven't mentioned?


  • Hi rockstar66200, so I can understand your anger /desperation with the NHS, however it's also a long, long road to some sort of balance and harmony for you to possibly achieve in your quest to be pain free,whilst I suffer with a couple of long term health conditions and to be honest I have to come to realise that I will be not pain free, I've done the pain clinics, and the tea and coffee mornings and I find I've become a recluse because of my conditions, and the only time I go to the doctors is either for more antibiotics or with a symptoms that over the counter remedies don't cure, so yep feel pretty miffed that I'm still no further forward and at the same time getting the DWP on my case, christ they've got all the information about me, are they then making my own GP to be a liar, it's bad enough when you feel bad, and then having them lot on your case, is it no wonder folk are suffering with depression, and physical illnesses,so I just can't be bothered with anyone anymore, so folk come on this forum for all sorts of reasons and mine is just to say your not alone, we are the invisible ones, but always make your opinion known and you never know someone will hear you,thanks for your post

  • I'm only 30 years old how can I live like this. It's no life, seeing my friends get on in life and I'm suck here with no outlook

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