Hi everyone I am the primary caregiver to my son for the last 22 years as he's been diagnosed with a Severe Mental illness at the age of 15 now 37 where it has wrecked the hell out of me physically mentally emotionly taking a huge toll on my health . There seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel. So I find solace in.reading or finding people in the same boat as myself where staying positive and motivated is a struggle .. Lol and I stumbled on to this website and I liked what I read ..
Hi. I am not in the same situation as you now, but reading your post brought back feelings of when I cared for my mum. Help is out there for you and your son (i am in the uk) I hope you will get the care, help, and respite you deserve really soon. Best wishes x
I have often wondered how parents of chronically ill children cope. Life is tough enough without the added troubles that ill health brings on. People without pain don't understand nor do they want to. Thankfully, I have never been in your situation, but I can send my best wishes, respect, hugs and prayers to you. Get the help you deserve. Take advantage of whatever help is available. Don't be afraid to ask for help! That means asking friends and family to step in for you when you need a much needed break!
Hello jisellesummer glad you found us and here to help where we can.
I am sole carer to my husband so can understand some of what you live through.
I am probably preaching to the converted but have you been in touch with Carers UK? I used to live in Scotland where we had a local group who met once a month = funded by the local authority. Trouble is I couldn't go very often as no one to look after my husband when I was out!
Message me if I can be of any use!
x
Good Morning Paton iam in NZ and u live a solitaire life caregiving my son as over the years that Mental Stigma has been so cruel to us : lack of understanding education compassion with friends and family .My faith in the mental.health system and knocking on doors that close before they open is tiresome and frustrating . I have asked for care support over the years and have just a few weeks ago been allocated days for a break . It seemed like I had to reach breaking point to get this funded by the government . But I soldier on have had 2 partners incl my son's father leave us due to a hate they seem to build toward my son wanting him placed in in a Institution . It is no.easy job but I no in my heart iam doin the right thing . A Mother's love is un conditional I belive 😊
I am sorry - I should have read your profile. UK is as bad a system as NZ so I do understand.
We moved to the Canary Islands over a year ago. Not for better care but more sunshine. As it worked out we have a lodger who also helps out with my husband so a huge help andd breaks for me.
It is damned hard and while charities spout wonderful things...we get on with the caring and no respite
x
Hi... I have no experience of the kind of life you must have, so can't offer any advice. But what I do know is that despite our determination and strength there comes a point where we need something for ourselves to enable us to recharge our batteries. You say you read and talk to others in a similar situation, but when was the last time you took an hour out to go to club for older people or a class for a bit of mental stimulation or exercise like tai chi or even a swim a your local pool. Somewhere you could just be 'you' and enjoy yourself, switch off from your troubles for a while. Is that something that might be possible? You don't say how old you are or whether you are male or female, but we go through a lot of changes ourselves as we age, and hormones do play havoc with us, leaving us feeling 'wiped out' both physically and mentally. How are you, are eating well, sleeping well. Sometimes a change of diet and routine can do wonders. But more importantly when was the last time you had a health MOT?
I don't know which support groups there are available in your area, but keep looking, keep asking. Most of all, don't keep beating yourself up because you feel you should be coping.... what you do is both mentally and physically draining and you're not a machine, you are a warm, kind human being who needs some tlc - sometimes, we all do. You take care.
As the other's have said you must keep pressing for some respite care and help for you in supporting your son. Your batteries need recharging as well as your mind and body. Keep at your doctor and any mental health resources in your area. You are one very strong woman doing what would take 3 or 4 others to do if your son did go to a care centre for just one day. Be proud of yourself your a super mum who just needs some TLC to keep going. I really do hope you get some aid for you and your son...
CRPS is there anyone out there?
Teeth came out
Husband out of Hospital
Crying out for help
