Need help can't cope any longer

Please please can anyone help me I suffer with a bad back I've for over 5 years but over the last couple of mouths it so bad and the last 2 Weieks I can stand for more than f ew seconds the pain is in my back and down my leg and then the pain GPs in my shoulder and a strange feeling gos down my arm and in my hand my hand go weak. And the feeling is so we'd I am only 33 I can't cope pease can anyone help me x

37 Replies

  • Sorry to hear you are really struggling.

    You don't say what your conditions are or what meds and treatments you have had.

    Have you explained all this to your GP? Or had a referral to the pain clinic?

    Maybe too many meds are working against each other?

    Pat x

  • I'm sorry you are in so much pain and feel desperate. I know that feeling all to well, it consumes you overwhelms you.

    It sounds like you have a nerve problem in your lumber spine & neck. Don't get to disheartend there is light at the end of the tunnel,

    The Butrans patch I'm on has just run out of its pain medication. I'm awake with the nasty pain.

    Have you had any injections do you go to pain clinic?

    There're things that can help you.

    I went through exactly the same as you the pain seem to go into another dimension.

    You require another doctors visit and to re think your medication

    Jen x

    Ps hope your pain eases


  • Hello. It sounds like you are in terrible pain. Can you get hold of a doctor quickly? Or possibly call an ambulance? You need help. Like Paton has said you don't mention your conditions or treatment. I am sorry things are so hard right now.


  • Hi Hun I have a prolapse disk that is nerve my spine they can't operation as they said I would end up in a wheel chair i am on morphine patches 100mg also tramdol 50 mg I have dizpan but don't like then I also have orl morphing to take as and when I need but I have 3 kids so I don't like takeing all this stuff so try to only take like when I am in pain like this but it's not help I don't no what to do or where to turn I've bin stuck in back for four days my daughter has to help me to the loo in and out the shower this pain is out of control xxthanks for your reply

  • Hi have u tried a tens machine? Its really good. U need to speak to your doctors again too for help. I get the same pains ands its agony I no. Waiting on an epidural. Hope u get some help with this. Dee

  • Hi dee he I've got a tense Michine it's not working I've try everything xx

  • Hello. A little more information would help. I'm sorry you are suffering so much. You will find a lot of empathy here are most people have been in the position of not coping. Some of us have moments like that every day.

    Tel us a bit about what your GP says and what treatment you are having g at the moment.

    In the meantime it sounds like emergency care is in order if you can't stand.

    Hope you find something to help today.


  • Hi dee. I suffer with back pain for over 3 years I no how to deal with it day to day and what works and what does not but this is out of control I have bin in bed for four days my daughter has to help me to the loo in and out the shower the pain is so bad when laid down or stand up I can't strait my leg I have to bend them cause I get a wide feeling in my legs the piain is in the bottom of my back and every couple of minutes the pain runs up my back and Dow my right arm but in my are the pain stop at my should and a weirdo feeling runs down my arm and my hand goes tight and I can't bend my fum and to of my fingers that could last from a few seconds to about 5 minutes but the pain in my back is out of control I don't no what to do or who to turn to I just want to be a mum thank you for replying I've bin writing this reply since 3 this morning xx

  • I am not trying to trivialise your pain, but something that worked for my frozen shoulder which I had for over 3 years is Magnesium tablets. I know it sounds odd, but I take one at night and it has made a huge difference. Magnesium is a muscle relaxant, which is why you take it at night as it relaxes you. It is only £2 off the shelf for a month in the supermarket so really is worth a try. Also, I was found to be very low on vitamin D and needed prescription medication for that - this also causes pain. Hope this might help.

  • what has your gp said\?

  • Usually you would see a pain management doctor or a neurosurgeon for an MRI and if that shows nothing, a ct myleogram. I look at my scans with a dicom viewer when I get a copy on CD. Prolotherapy is usually a good start if you can afford it,

  • If you dont think its related to your spine, then you might see a lyme disease specialist, because lyme disease infects nerves and the brain and can make back pain worse.

  • See a chiropractor and a sports therapist for a second opinion. Then take this second opinion to your doctor. I suspect that you have muscle control and posture problems and need the help of specialists that are available in the complementary medical field.

  • I have a prolapse disk it's too mere my Spain they can't opr on my cause it a good chance I will end in a wheel chair I when doctors and they ask me what I want as I am on trmdol 100mg and morphine patches and. A few others I am in pain all day everyday my back in spams all the time if I dint have kids I would of give up by now I so wish I had the money to go privet I so wish I need help xx

  • It could possibly be sciatica. You really need to see your GP asp. And DEMAND something is done. Too many people are scared of upsetting their GP but they are there to help you not hinder you. I really hope you can get yourself sorted out as I've been through the same until I demanded my GP done something and it was

  • I have a prolapse disk I am on pain killers 100mg tramdol ,morphine psychs 100mg. And some other thing if I did not have kids I would of give up I am only 33 it's too mere my spine they can't op ratio on me cause I will end up in a wheel chair I so wish I had the money to go privet it so not far on my kids I go doctors and they ask me what I want them to do for me I feel like I am wastering there time when I go they make me feel uncomfortable , I want to be a good mum to my kids but like this I can't my wish is to go private I am a single parent with 3 kids my husband pass away 2 years a go in a hit and run xx

  • A doctor asking you what they can do is not being sarcastic this is a genuine question.

    You mention tramadol and morphine patches - which didn't exist so I assume Butrans ?

    There are stronger opioids you can go on, but they have risks. Adjuncts should be used too, things like amitriptyline, Duloxetine and pregabalin.

    I think you need to be referred to a pain specialist and have your medication looked at but also consider going on a pain management program.

  • You need to find a physical movement specialist who can teach you the needed skills. Pain killers do not give you movement skills that are needed to enable good movement with a prolapsed disc. Pain is very useful it warns you something is wrong. Killing the pain could cause you to damage something or inflame something that you could avoid if you had the discomfort warnings.

    However what ever you do it is important that the doctor is kept informed. The doctor may suddenly remember a colleague is working in the area that may benefit you.

    Knowledge of movement does not come from reading books. It comes from doing movement carefully and noticing what happens. It is paying attention to yourself as you do something. It will take time to learn this skill. The concept of a doctor helping a patient to investigate themselves is not something doctors have been trained to do. You have to train yourself and this is a long process of trail and error.

    You need to work on the muscles. At this point use your network connections of your friends to find a yoga teacher who is willing to help. The local Hindu temple is a good place to start as there is a possibility that they know of free yoga courses. This will enable to do more networking.

    Having no funds is always problematic. Words mean all sorts of things to different people according to previous experience. A skillful movement feels good, but I have no idea how to describe what it is what it is without using my hands to guide the movement.

    Sorry for being a bit blunt.

  • For my pain I am on tramadol and codrymydol. When they stopped working I went on slow release morphine tablets and oramorph for breakthrough pain. Perhaps this is something you can discuss with your GP

    For immediate treatement your only options are calling an out of hours GP covering your area or straight to A and E, the later is better, you do not have to put up with this level of pain but you must do something to get help.

    Best wishes Patrick

  • Why is A+E better ? This is a chronic ongoing problem that isn't a life threatening emergency ? I mean no disrespect to the OP.

    In all probability a GP could do more in terms of prescribing stronger pain relief i.e oral morphine which A+E doctors are unlikely to do.

    Even if the hospital gave IV morphine this will only last a few hours and the patient will be back in pain.

  • If you read what I said Dunktm. It says for IMMEDIATE pain relief nothing to do with a long term or even medium term care. A and E is open 24/7 and GPs nine to five if you can get an appointment, get there then trundle down the chemists and pick up your prescription!

  • You must be lucky if you get immediate pain relief. A 4 hour wait is the norm. GP's are open longer than 9 to 5, it is called the out of hours GP. Maybe your struggling to understand the difference between a chronic problem and long term care.

  • I don't want to argue lets just agree to differ, we both want the same outcome, in fact if we added both of our ideas together it may be the best outcome!. My out of hours GP is actually a building added on to the hospital! I usually have a thirty minute wait at A and E, timing on when to go is important. My wife works In the Intensive Care Unit though thankfully hasn't treated me. I have only once used the ambulance when I was curled up in pain on the floor and the call was made for me. I remember a bumpy fast ride then getting in but then I passed out!

  • Are you the same person who is posting as Hidden as well? Most peculiar. I think you need to calm down and read my last post. A and E is not just for life threatening injuries, I have taken my son several times for stitches after coming off his skateboard on the same knee. It is an appropriate place to seek help for chronic pain relief. Do let this go it's not helping anyone.

  • how rude.

  • Unfortunately, A&E won't do much except give you meds that you probably already have, such as morphine. They often won't even give you more than 10-20ml, which sounds like it won't even touch your pain. It's a chronic problem, that they will send you back to your GP or Pain Specialist to treat. I know that sounds terrible, but that is how it works. Unless your life is at risk you are not a priority to them.

    I have three times been to A&E by ambulance due to excruciating back and pelvic pain, that I could not treat with morphine any longer, as I risked overdosing. Last time, I spent 7 hours on a trolley in complete agony, sobbing and crying out in pain until I was just utterly exhausted. I honestly wanted to die. It was a traumatic experience. Staff were walking past me like I was invisible, completely oblivious to my suffering. Laughing and chatting. It was totally inhumane and I will never go back again.

    If you can get a Doctor out to you, they could prescribe something stronger than morphine, such as ketamine. Never be afraid to demand pain relief, scans, different doctors or specialists outside of your normal hospital, whatever it is. The louder you shout and more fuss you make, the more things can be pushed along, or other options explored that may not previously have been 'available'. We had to do this, and if I hadn't have had CT scans done at the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital I would never have known that my previous surgery was a complete shambles. They immediately saw things that were wrong that none of the other surgeons or Pain Management people at the other hospitals had noticed. They all told me the surgery looked perfectly fine and they could do no more.

    Please call your GP, get them to come to you and see what they say. We all are here for you as much as we can be and know how hard it is living in such awful pain. Please don't give up.



  • I dont think your response was overly sympathic or helpful. Please remember this site is for helping and supporting others and whilst you are correct in that a proper care plan needs to be put in place, when a group member states that they are in dispair - they need urgent help. This is not a criticism its just something to keep in mind when posting.

  • I just think so many people were posting - thats how that happened, Anyway how are you keeping? I assume from your name you were born in 87? I was in 86 so I think we probably have a lot in common lol x

  • the guilty man runs when no one is chasing him

  • You sound very much like you have a herniated disc in neck as well as nerve irradiation in back. I had three level fusion in neck from pain numbness etc from herniated discs in neck. Vthe pain is horrendous . I suggest seeing a orthopedic Dr/ surgeon quickly. I tried waiting too long and my arm function really wasn't good. Neurontin helped but surgery fixed it. Best wishes I know you need it. I also wanted you to know it did effect my walking too so pls get help asap. Take care.

  • If you are in so much pain that you are desperate and beyond the point of dispair call an ambulance. No shame in it.

  • exactly. when i go to a e they are not all dying 😂

  • Hi pat I have a pro lapses dick and back is all ways going in to spams I've had acute puncher but I only had 2 treatments as my back was in spams everytime the needles was coming out my back so they so they was not able to get the needles in the right places cause of the spams I am under the pain clic at wythenshawe hospital they do there best but I don't feel like I am getting anywhere xx

  • Speak to your GP about a referral to a physiotherapist. They will do all the assessments to try and find out what the problem is and then they will help with the treatment. Try to find out if you have the "Back in action" programme in your town and try to get referred to them by your GP, as it is a wonderful programme that looks at the back pain as a whole: the physical reason for the pain, the psychological impact, how they can help you at home/work.

  • I am in a similar situation where I am at breaking point with pain. I do find like otherd have suggested that a TENS machine can and does help a lot. Talk to your gp, don't leave his office until he realises how desperate you are.

    Thoughts and prayers go out to you.


  • Hi, hope you have some respite from your pain, it's very exhausting and traumatic. You don't have to be super mum! What a child most wants is love and attention which I'm sure you give them! That and reading with them is the greatest start they can have security and learning.

    Being ex military I wanted to go climbing, sailing, camping, canoeing etc For me to teach him the skills but that is something I have had to let go off. Instead we have long chats about history which he loves and teach him about different plants trees and animals. I can just about sit through him playing football at school but he's keener on basketball and American Football !!! I hoped it would have been rugby!

    Hope your in less pain and today has been good

    Patrick x

  • Thank you for your lovely reply I no but some day I feel like a shit mum u have good days and bad days but at the min it's just bin bad days for the last 2 months it's driving me mad my kids are great they are so under standing ive got a 13 15 11 year old they help me so much I could not ask for better kids xx

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