CT Scan day

hi ladies

well its that time... 3 monthly scan. Why do I get so bloomin worked up? theres bugger all I can do to change the outlook, so intellectually I know its a waste of time and energy, but I still get myself all worked up. the 'what if' monster is here, and taken up residence in my head, every ache, pain, twinge is attributed to the return of the dreaded c.

Cant concentrate, and need to get to uni, then on for the scan, but brain has seized up.

AArgh. need to get my act together, and return to rationality.

get my results next tuesday ........

sue

11 Replies

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  • Hi Sue

    I soooo know how you feel! Once this thing is in your head it never goes away. I have my first check up after remission this Thursday and feel terrified. I am going away for a week on Saturday but can't think beyond the dreaded appointment.

    Hope all goes well and fingers crossed for the results next Tuesday.

    Love Linda xx

  • Sue,

    Ok - 'park' this reaction! I mean really drive it into a parking space in your mind and promise yourself that you will return and drive it away when you know the outcome - then carry on with your day, and tell yourself that the scan is not 'real' until you get the result. That result will be brilliant, anyway so you've saved all that anxiety for something real like whether you should go to the moon!

    Very best wishes,

    Isadora.

  • Hi Sue,

    Sending you best wishes for Tuesday lots of love x G x :-)

  • Hi Sue

    I sooooo know what you mean! When I had my check ups due, I didnt have scans as my ca125 was a reliable marker, but the minute I went for my blood tests I had every symptom in the book! I think it's a natural reaction, and there isn't a thing you can do about it, no matter what anyone tells you, you can't help the way you are made. My advice is not to worry about the fact you are worrying, just try to cope the best you can, then when you hopefully get the still clear have a celebration.

    Best wishes

    Chris

  • Hi Sue

    "Good luck" for Tuesday.....Think we are all the same getting uptight about blood tests

    hospital visits and twinges.I get sooo nervous now everything has finished - but nothing

    bothered me when going through all the hospital visit for surgery and then chemo.

    My heart will be racing and i'll be sweating like a pig next monday when I go see

    my oncologist for my 3monthly check. Hope I come away thinking silly me what was

    I worried about.

    Best Wishes

    Angie xx

  • Hello Sue,

    I have been doing this now for THREE YEARS, every blinking time !!

    But I get in there on the bed and when they scan me the light is the sun, I switch off and pretend Im lying on a beach with the water lapping away, smell the smells, and Im there in my head (am I nuts lol)

    Good Luck.

    lun trish x

  • Hey Sue,

    well as you can see you from everyone else you definitely aren't on your own.. i had my three monthly scan about a month ago and it was a disaster..i hadnt realised how worked up i was about everything and when it came to being sat in the seat with my feet in those oh so lovely stirrups i had my surgeon/onc scanning me telling me everything looked fine..i reacted to this by bursting into tears whilst having tissues thrown at my face by concerned nurses asking me what was wrong Haha! not my most dignified moment.... of course nothing was wrong i was just so relieved and had held all my anxieties in. once i had calmed down my surgeon/onc gave me some advice "don't spend every moment worrying about something you cant predict, only when you know something is there can you do something about it." easy for him to say i guess but it kind of helped put things into perspective! Goodluck with your scan Xxxx

  • Thank you all, it helps that others know how it feels, during the 3 months, I am a perfectly rational human, then come scan / results time I turn into a gibbering wreck unable to function very well.

    To all you others who are due results- GOOD LUCK!

    Sue

    X

  • Hi... Well if u look back on prev questions....

    I really thought i was goi g mad... My mind has been in a turmoil for the last couple of weeks. Its three weeks until i go back for a check up.. Ive cried every day.. Ive had the shakes.... Feeling sick.. And even dark thoughts...i did think i was cracking up.. But these ladies have given me some sort of calmness... Im not coping brilliantly.. But betta than before...i thi nk its...a constant fight with my body... Pains etc and then my stupid brain... . Im pleased... Im betta than last week.... Good luck

    I pray we all have a long remission

    Shenx

  • Bless you shen, thinking of you.

    X

  • Going through the same feelings. Got scan results coming on Wednesday to see if the trial is working. Feel terrified as I had tried so hard for a PARP trial and it is so much easier to take than normal chemo. Dont want to be chucked off. Think fear is partof our lives now, at least we all understand here.

    Good luck! x x

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