A little sad and scared today

In the last 3 years since turning 30 I have had 3 cancerous ovarian cysts and have now had both my ovaries removed. In my last check up I made a comment about not being worried about recurrence as everything (ir my ovaries) has been removed so there's nowhere left for it to come back. He mentioned that it could still appear somewhere nearby which I guess I'd never thought about. My main fear revolves around the fact that the 3 times I did have it my blood tests were all 100% fine so how will my regular blood tests help put my mind at ease? I asked what symptoms to look out for but they are all vague and I now think I can notice some but imagine its just psychosomatic. I have never been fearful through this whole experience but I had a friend yesterday find out that he has terminal cancer (at the age of 20) and it has made me so sad and fearful and I don't know how to shake it.

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  • Huge hugs to you. It is a scary place to be and sometimes the fear can just take over, I know what thats like as do all the other ladies on here.

    The only thing Id say is 'try' not to stress yourself and worry now, while you are 'in the clear'. Im living with it, Im not having treatment at the mo but I have taught myself to put it in a box, shut the lid and not let it take over. Its taken me ages to get to this point (Im only 36), but I look at my kids and I owe it to them to get out of bed, and get on with my day. The fact is, I could well outlive a lot of people I know so my mantra now really is get busy living not get busy dying!

    Sorry to ramble on and I dont know if what I say will help at all because everyones experience is personal but just knw that you arent alone hun.

    Kate xxxx

  • Hi! It must feel really scary at the moment, I'd imagine is natural for you to feel like this especially when your friend has just had such an awfully young diagnosis. Your experience also highlights why the use of CA125 tests is such a variable indicator. If you have any symptoms .... anything at all ..... I would list them and note the frequency, then, even if it is psychosomatic, you can go along with some concrete evidence to your GP. Even better, if you have a contact number for the specialist nurse at the hospital where you had your op, give her a ring and ask her advice. In my experience, they are very understanding and very approachable and do not mind taking the time to explain why things are feeling as they are for you.

    Don't sit at home feeling scared though. You'll feel better when you've taken some positive action. Good luck

    Love Wendy xx

  • I know where you are coming from!

    I agree with all above...and keeping a diary of any symptoms is a good idea, then you can show these at your check up.

    My OC was only diagnosed by accident only after being treated for something completely different, so by writing down any symptoms it would give a clearer indication if anything is more persistent and worsening with time.

    So my key to coping is to keep busy and not to think about the what ifs etc, as it doesn't solve anything. Easier said that done I know, but trying to think positive.. There are some days I almost despair at it all, but then there are good days too...

    I do hope all goes well with you

    hugs

    jules x

  • Stay positive, and live each day to the best of your ability. I'm a lot older than you, but if I'd known then what I know now I wouldn't have put off things for a later date..... waiting until we retired would have been useless, so I'm glad we bought some things forward. You don't say if you have children, but making memories for my grandchildren is a priority now. Stay positive and enjoy life, and let the future take care of itself.

    Love n hugs [[[[[[[ ]]]]]]]

    Viv

  • Sounds trite I know but you are living with it not dying of it! Live every day and every minute and remember that thee are worse things to have. Cancer isjust a word not an immediate death sentence. Live, live, live and fill your days with things you like to do and people you love to be with. It is a disease, and a frightening one, but not the immediate end of the world.

    Margaret

  • Thanks everyone for your advice and kind words. I am very much a live for every moment kind of person - just have a bad day now and then. I have a wonderful and positive partner - we are currently exploring options of donor eggs to start a family and after the trauma of finding out last year that we wouldnt be able to have our own babies I really want this last chance to carry a baby and so the concerns of a reoccurance are more amplified.

    Thanks again everyone for your support. X

  • Good Luck with this. Concentrate on keeping well, busy, positive etc etc. I know what a difficult journey it is, wanting a family and finding things difficult. Another friend is going through similar things. It's such a roller-coaster, isn't it

    Good luck

    Love Wendy xx

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