I saw the Oncologist today, even though it's Bank Holiday Monday, and will start my chemo two weeks today. I don't know if I'm glad or not. I am glad that I have some definite date to work towards, as I feel more confident with my 'Plan'. I've been feeling in limbo up to know since I saw the surgeon who confirmed the tumour was malignant, which was about two weeks ago now. As I wasn't sure where the chemo would be, I haven't had anyone to speak to to get help and advice, except this group, so have been feeling a bit lost. I have to be very organised and efficient at work, and this does tend to run through into my home life, so I like to know what's happening and when. I've felt so lost, as I had no idea when things were going to start, so haven't been able to plan my return to work. I'm not ready to drive yet, I have to wait a couple more weeks, so won't be working before I start my chemo. Ho Hum.
We're off to Cornwall on holiday in June, and they have managed to organise the chemo, so my good weeks will be when I'm away, so we're thrilled. We booked this last October/November, and I would never in a million years have guessed I'd be juggling chemo sessions with it. Life has a way of keeping you guessing doesn't it.
Anyway, I've got to have a CT scan and a kidney function test before I start the chemo, and I'm off into Manchester at the end of next week to get a wig. Whether or not I'll actually wear it, we'll see, but I think I'd feel more confident in the early days with one than without. Sorry, seem to be rambling on a bit at the moment, so I'll clear off now, as my Husband has just made me a cup of tea, which he's started calling my teamotherapy!! If only it was that easy......
Love and Best Wishes to everyone,
Sally XX
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Now you can get your plans made. Life does have a way of refusing to be marshalled! With luck, you should still be feeling ok early in the treatments and enjoy your holiday.
Very best wishes,
Isadora
Thinking of you Sally, hang on in there with the chemo, dont rush thing's, let it all fall into place, it will. Have yourselves a lovely holiday, and enjoy the break.
Hi Sally,thanks for your comment about my lumps,I reckon that theres a good chance youre right and it is just infection.Im glad that you have a date now as limbo is a hard place to be,though obviously Im so sorry that you or anyone needs chemo at all!I can relate to not having anyone to talk to about all this and like you I have found it so helpful to be able to talk on this site.Its great that we get the medical help we need but I have found that my treatment has not dealt with the questions that come up as we enter the different stages of oc,there really doesnt seem anyone to ask and its just a matter of waiting til the next app.!Keep us posted as to how you are and like the others I hope you have an amazing holiday! Cornwall is beautiful,though I only know bits of it!God bless,Gilly xxx
I know what you mean about liking to feel organised. I'm waiting on a ct scan and haven't really been able to settle on anything else until I hear, although my consultant was pushing for it.
Think Kefi has the right idea- just let it all happen but it is difficult though.
Good luck with the wig- they are so much better than 35 years ago when my best friend, who was one of the first in the country to have chemo, had hers made!
Hi Anne, Good luck with your CT scan, it's a good idea to take a book with you, as you'll possibly have to drink a litre of fluid before hand, and wait a couple of hours for it to go through all your bowel. Hope it all goes well, and thanks for your comments about the wig.
Love Sally XX
Hi Sally, best of luck for your chemo, it's not too bad. On the bad days you'll think you'll never get to the end of it, but believe me you do! I kept a symptoms diary which helped me to know what to expect day to day - there's a definite pattern to it all which you start to recognise after a while. I finished my chemo almost 2 months ago and I'm feeling really good now, getting back to normal, which feels great.
Hi Rachel, Thanks for that. If all goes according to plan, then I should finish on August 21st, which seems ages away, the other side of the summer almost, but I'm sure it'll be better than I thought. It helped enormously having one of the nurses from the Oncology Unit go through everything and tell me what to expect, so I am a lot more positive now.
Hi Sally.. really pleased you have a date for the start of your chemo. I'm currently in remission, almost 4 years now, but i still remember the feelings well..
You might feel a little nauseous for a couple of days after but the hospital will give you some anti sickness pills which do help ( they do in the UK, i presume your here?).. I found too that eating/drinking ginger in any way shape or form helped my queeziness too so buy some xx biscuits...ginger beer...anything.
Also i felt just like you regarding the wig and bought a long blonde one in the style i had before i lost my hair.. aquaintances were confused as they had heard i'd "gone bald" but suddenly i had hair..
i only wore my wig if i was going out other than that i wore bandana's with baseball caps..
I even bought a couple of hats that had hair attached!! they were ok too.
I hope all goes well for you Sally.. I'll keep checking on here too
Hi Tracey, Thanks for that. I'll get some ginger items. I'm not supposed to eat biscuits, as I'm diabetic, but what the hell, I think a couple would be ok under the circumstances. I'll post again when I've had it, and hopefully it won't be as bad as I think.
Sorry to hear that you have to have chemo - it may seem like it's a never ending cycle of treatment but it does pass quickly and you also make so many new friends who will help you get through it so you are not on your own.
One thing I found that helped me was to write a diary of what was happening and my feelings at the time. When I was feeling low I was able to read through it and realise that there are many good days throughout chemo and it kept me going through those low times. After my treatment finished, I was able to look back and remember all the good times that happened which may become overshadowed by the low days. It has really helped me in my recovery. Remember to write about your holiday too.
Glad you have a start date as the sooner it begins the sooner it ends. The chemo was not too bad, in fact I had a few days each time of just feeling a bit spaced out and drunk. Everyone kept telling me that people pay a lot of money to feel like that!
I know how you feel about not being able to organise your life when chemo gets in the way. We are having to rejuggle a number of plans as my last chemo was postponed while they investigated a neck to toe rash and now that pattern of treatments/good days has changed. But this time round I am more confident about negotiating treatment times if there is something I really want to do.
I will be thinking of you whan you start chemo. At first I found the first few days of chemo brain intolerable - fuzzy, no concentration, etc, but once I knew waht to expect i factored in 2/3 days of sleeping and listening to books, radio - and it now isn't so frustrating.
Hi Angela, Thanks for that. I think I must have pre-chemo brain at the moment, as I have to write every appointment down. Ihave a GFR test on tuesday and a CT scan on thursday, then I'm ready to start the chemo.
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