Need help and support with dealing with dealing with life after major debulking surgery and chemo.

[Hinkleberry]

I am 39 years old and really struggle with dealing with the aftermath of surgery and chemo.

[Trickysite]

Dear H, so sorry to hear this. Can you say a little more about the things on your mind and if you have tried in ways to cope. Do yo have anyone to support you? It is all a journey, as they say, and you will feel different at different stages.

[mrstadpole]

Hi I'm sorry to hear that things are so difficult for you at the moment.What kind of things worry you the most or does it seem that everything is a problem now.?I found it took some time to process all the things that you are told but hopefully it will get much better for you soon xx

[SUE7777]

You can talk to the Ovacome Support Line 0800 008 7054 and you can go to your GP and ask for counselling you have been given a horrible diagnosis and the treatment is hard so try and be easy on yourself. All the best Sue xx

[K95m]

Hi H

You have gone through a massive trauma , cancer and it’s treatment takes a big toll on your physical and mental health. I have recommended this book before as it’s the only book out there I think that deals with the emotional aftermath of cancer. It helped me enormously after my treatment ended and I was told to “ Go out and live your life” . How ?

It’s called “ The cancer survivor’s companion”

It’s written by Dr. Francis Goodhart an NHS clinical psychologist who works with patients with life threatening illnesses and Lucy Atkins a health writer.

It really is a brilliant book and is highly recommended by Maggie’s , Macmillan etc.

I urge you to get it. I still read it from time to time when I feel down and I’m 6 years since diagnosis.

[OvacomeSupport Partner My Ovacome Team]

Hello Hinkleberry

Thank you for your message. I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. You've already had some kind replies from our members and this forum is a very knowledgeable and supportive space. If you feel able to give some further details I'm sure our members will be able to share experiences and suggestions regarding what they have found helpful for them.

As Sue7777 says, you can call us on the supportline Monday-Friday 10am-5pm on 0800 008 7054, you can also private message us through the forum, email [e-mail], instant chat through our website ovacome.org.uk or we can set up a video call if you prefer.

You may also be interested in our Under 45s support group, who meet on the first Wednesday of every month. You can sign up through our website here: ovacome.org.uk/Event/under-...

We are here to support you, so please don't hesitate to get in touch if you want to talk anything through.

Best wishes

Anna

Ovacome Support

[Marylight]

Hi! send you a big hug. At 38 I was diagnosed and had to do this same process.

Every person is totally different, and can have different impacts in body and mind, I was very scared because you can read heavy things online but, in my case it was ok... my body was very gentle to me.

Very few or mild hot flashes or mood swings. I decided to help me with very good clean food and went to the psychiatrist, at least once a month, she helped with meds when needed for any anxiety or if I couldn't sleep, no dependence on them 2 years after that, having them as needed.

I also adopted a dog, have no kids, the puppy believe it or not, is a soothing therapy. And I pray a lot!! I was not too religion oriented before.

I searched for success stories that gives me hope, then and now too.

I continue to work via home office all my chemo, I decided this was not going to tear me apart, did not watch the news or any sad / drama movie, series etc, or be arround pesimist / drama people, only happy company who would be by my side cheering me up.

Only happy contents, I created my inner bubble, and went through it, I think .. quite well.

I just came from a beach trip this afternoon, it is going to be OK.

Hope any of this helps, and good luck!!

[delia2]

I’m so sorry you are suffering. I’m much older than you but still find it all challenging to deal with. You’ve got good suggestions here. I’m just sending hugs.

[Tabor]

Hello Hinkleberry, so sorry you are feeling lost. Our God is for us, He will give you the strength you need to get through this. Breathe and pray for His comfort. I certainly will be praying for you. 🦋

[Hinkleberry]

Thank you to everyone who commented with all your advice and kind words of comfort and advice. I am struggling with the menopause side of things. I feel like the diagnosis, surgery and even the chemo was so much easier to deal with and it was temporary, because its all over now, but now its dealing with my new body. I don't recognise myself or my own body anymore. The whole experience left me feeling like I was unwillingly abducted by aliens and they poked and prodded me and took all my organs and then just dumped me back on earth. And to be fair the NHS was amazing every step of the way, preparing me so well and giving me so much information for every step but no one prepared or spoke about the menopause. The menopause feels so permanent, because I deal with it on a daily basis. Does that make sense?