Up in the air

[ScardyCat40]

Just thought I would post an update on life in general.

Things have been a bit stressful as mum fell down the stairs in her flat at the beginning of December. She fractured her pelvis, ribs and left hand. Had a few days on ICU whilst they tried to get her pain under control and treated her for a chest infection.

She is now in intermediary care whilst she has some rehab and her medical team are recommending her for rehousing, which we all want but it will present some financial and logistical problems.

I have been very busy running around trying to sort things out for Mum so feeling a bit stressed. It has been a huge distraction from my own symptoms but I have only had a bit of back ache and some mild shortness of breath.

I am still on the LOGS trial I am due a CT scan next week. My ejection fraction which is monitored as part of the trial has been slowly falling. At my last appointment it was 54% I think the trial protocols say at 52% they have to stop the trial but I can have one more dose reduction. Otherwise it seems to be keeping the cancer stable but it’s not clearing up my pleural effusions.

I did have an appointment last month for a pleurodesis but they had to give my bed away. I haven’t rescheduled as I have been so busy with mum and my breathing has been manageable

[Hidden]

You sound like you have so much on your plate, from someone who went through this with both my parents and mother in law over the past 2-3 years, it’s so stressful and I can only urge you to make sure that you think about yourself as much as you can. Just remember that you can be no help to anyone if you grind yourself down. Please take care

Marian xxx

[ScardyCat40 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Marian I am trying not to do that but it can be hard getting the balance right

[Hidden]

Gosh you have a lot on your plate. Maybe it's time to look after yourself now your Mum is being cared for. You have to mind yourself too

[ScardyCat40 in reply to Hidden]

Sadly they don’t do her laundry 😖

[Hidden]

Oh dear that has to be awkward hope you find asolution

[ScardyCat40 in reply to Hidden]

Yes it’s me

[lorraine71-Australia]

Hi, It would be hard to find that balance looking arfter your mum and yourself I'm so lucky with my supportive family 2 daughters and a husband, I don't know how ladies who do not have the support manage.

Have you someone who can help with your Mum?

As Marian said you will not be of help to your mum if you don't look arfter yourself.

Do take care of yourself..Lorraine xx

[ScardyCat40 in reply to lorraine71-Australia]

I have a brother but he has a young family and works part time

[Purple-iris]

Wow what a stressful time for you . Remember to take care of yourself too and don’t put off your own appointments or treatment. I was busy teaching and looking after mum and family and didn’t go back for a gynea checkup several years before I was diagnosed and often wonder if I had done if they would have found the OC before it got to stage 4 . So I know it’s hard but you have to put your health first . I have had appointments over the last year that clash with mums at St Thomas's and am much better now at asking my brother to do his bit . He can be reluctant to offer !!!

We had an awful time with my mother and mother in law both being ill the year before I was diagnosed. They both moved in with us at one stage and my stress levels were through the roof ! Luckily their health issues are now stable of sorts but we had to make some changes moving mum out of the family home into a smaller flat and getting a carer to visit my mother-in law and take her shopping . After my surgery I wasn’t able to do anything for about 6 months so my brother had to step up . I used to do the cleaning and shopping for mum so she now has a cleaner .

So gradually we have been able to put things in place so I can go back to mostly being a daughter and not a carer although it’s not easy . Going round this morning to sort her medication 😀

Best wishes and hope you find a suitable home quickly and she continues to make a good recovery. Take care of yourself . Love Kim 💜

[ScardyCat40 in reply to Purple-iris]

Well to be fair it’s mostly the bed situation and the winter stress that has put me off going back. The hospital is across the other side of Manchester

[ScardyCat40]

I am treating myself to breakfast out this morning

[Purple-iris in reply to ScardyCat40]

Sounds good 😀

[Hidden]

Good for you because you are worth it enjoy

[Hidden]

Hello do hope care/move for your Mum gets sorted soon. Yes we too have over the past years had our share first Mum (dementia) then Dad on his own. It certainly does take some doing to manage along with not being well yourself. As I read your key issue I was wondering if your (or your Mums) local launderette does a weekly collection wash service. Our local one does they have a set same day pick up and return. There is a small charge ?? perhaps worth an ask ??

Do take care, easy to say I know but as you are on your own being a tad selfish now and again isn’t a sin. Sue x

[ScardyCat40]

Doing mum’s laundry is not such a big deal I just stick it in with mine. My biggest headache at the moment is setting up access so I can help her manage her day to day affairs. Even when she gets out of the Home her mobility will be limited for a whilst her bones mend. Mum is not that old about 66 yrs young. She does have some health problems but nothing that should stop her getting out and about once she has recovered and she is living somewhere she feels safe

[January-2016-UK]

Hope your mother is on the mend but it certainly adds to the stress. Good luck with your scan results so you can stay on the trial. It's good your breathing problems have eased somewhat.

Happy New Year!

[ScardyCat40 in reply to January-2016-UK]

Thanks and you as well. At the moment it is the echocardiogram that is the key test. I am not expecting many changes on my CT scan

[chrissapam]

Get someone ...pay them...(!) to. Do some laundry just for a while ....even if it means forgoing a few other things....you"re worth it!

Best wishes to your mum...glad your symptoms seem a bit more under control, love Chris x

[ScardyCat40 in reply to chrissapam]

That’s not really necessary

[chrissapam]

good....but are trying to look after YOU! X

[ScardyCat40 in reply to chrissapam]

Well I stick mum’s washing in with mine 😉. I decided I needed a break yesterday so rang mum to let her know I wouldn’t be coming in. However my brother rang me all stressed out about mum’s medications but I got him to ring the home as they are the ones that need to sort it out