They haven't done a biopsy yet for my mum but are saying it is stage 3c. Can they do this?

I am in bits at the moment and don't know where to turn. My mum has been newly diagnosed with ovarian cancer but she is having a laparoscopy tomorrow to see what stage it is at. She has had no symptoms until she got shingles about a month ago and she had ascites. She had 5 and a half litres drained off. I am continuely crying and really dont know what will happen next. My Mum is my world. She is 69 and I am 43. I am married with a very supportive husband and a 9 year old son. I just need to chat to someone who knows about this as it is new to us all. My Dad died of a brain tumour 17 years ago and I am petrified for my mum and what she will have to go through in the next few months. It breaks my heart. Thank you for listening.

16 Replies

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  • It does seem a bit odd that they could stage her before her operation... but it might be where her disease has progressed to...usually they give a ct scan and then after an operation give the staging and grade...you could give the ovacome helpline a ring they are very good at explaining things tel 0845 371 0554 or 0207 299 6650 (office hours)

    Best wishes love x G x

  • Thank you so much for answering Gwyn. I really appreciate that and feel I have some support now. The CT scan showed a thickening of her Omentum but they are unsure if it has spread from her ovary to there (or the peritoneum) or vice versa. We are all very confused at the moment. No doubt we will find out for sure next week. Thank you once again. Take care xx

  • So sorry to hear your news. I can imagine how you must be feeling.

    My only advice is to try and take each day as it comes. It will be difficult but the key for me was to take each appointment one at a time. try not to jump ahead too much. You will soon have all the results and prognosis. And you will always have someone on hand to answer you questions. The cancer nurses are usually so so good.

    I am sending you a great big hug and your mum too,

    Its a difficult time but stay positive.

    Lots and lots of love

    Suzanne,xx

  • I can't really add to what Gwyn and Suzanne have said but sending you my love. T xx

  • Hi there

    Welcome and so very sorry that you are going through this. It has obviously also brought back memories of your Dads illness , so it's no wonder you are feeling rough.

    The lap tomorrow will give you alot mire information...they have possibly diagnosed it on the basis of what they saw on scans. But even if it is Stage 3 many many ladies on this site have this staging , have been around for long time and will hopefully be here for many more years.

    It's fantastic for you that you have a lovely family of your own. All I can suggest is that you do for your Mum what my lovely husband did for me, wrap her up in love and affection and spend as much quality time as you can together , doing things that will take her mind off the situation...physical activities if that's possible. Once treatment starts thins move over y quickly , th initial time getting over the shock and waiting are terrible.

    All the very best , will think of you tomorrow.

    Love and hugs to you both.

  • Wise words in all the other replies.... this is a club no-one wants to join, but this site is a good place for support for you and your mum and for understanding more as her diagnosis and treatment become clearer. Welcome!

  • Hello. Sorry to hear about your mum but you have found a site that really helps, both you and your mum.

    As said lots of ladies, including me, have been diagnosed stage 3c and here to tell the tale years later. They can offer advice on lots of issues and worries you and your mum will face.

    You need to be strong and supportive for your mum, especially if she has an op and chemo, and by the sound if it I am certain you will be there for her.

    Take care of her, but don't forget yourself and your hubby and son.

    Irene xx

  • Hope all goes well for your Mum I am stage 3 and diagosed 4.5 years ago lots can be done. Take care and be strong for your Mum my daughters helped me all the way.

    Much Love to you and your Mum

    Jenny xxx

  • Welcome to this site. The other members have said it all really. I was diagnosed as 3b in June of last year and am pleased to report I am doing well. I have 2 wonderful daughters and they were a great support for me. They brought their baby boys to see me every day and this kept my spirits up. You are obviously a very loving daughter when you have sought us out so I am sure your mum will greatly benefit from the support of you and your family. Please remember to take care of yourself as well though. Wishing your mum and you all the best. Ann x

  • The answer is yes they can. The biopsy will determine the grade, ie high or low. The scan is usually sufficient to determine the Stage. Sandra only had a groin lump removed but her scan showed it to be stage 3c, prob the most common stage found. The biopsy on her removed lump determined it as high grade and this can take couple weeks. The Lap can sometimes (not always) discover bits not seen by the scan. Xx love Paul

  • So sorry that your Mum is in this position and I know how difficult it is, especially at the beginning when you are looking for answers to so many questions. You have come to the right place for support, we have all benefitted from this site and I'm sure you will too. I was diagnosed 3c in August 2012 and finished first line treatment in April 2013 which included the chemo/surgery/chemo 'sandwich'. Try not to delve too deeply into the detail about the condition online as it can be very scary. Remember, we are all individuals and generalisations and percentages about the disease are for the boffins. Your Mum is unique, as are we all so just try and concentrate on helping your Mum get through this and be there for her. My family have been and continue to be amazing as I'm sure you will be with your Mum. Please keep us updated on her progress. I'll be thinking of you.

    Love

    Annette xxx

  • Thank you to every single one of you who have replied to me. I am in tears writing this....I have been strong today and only had a few tears but I think they are starting to flow now. Mum had her laparoscopy today and is staying in tonight as she has a drain on and they think she looked too comfy to send home !! Irene thank you for telling me you were diagnosed with 3c......I am sooooooo glad you are doing so well. As I am sure you all went through in the first few weeks of being diagnosed, the doubts and questions .....this is what my mum and the rest of us are going through at the moment. I am so inspired by all of you and can give my mum hope......I suppose it is natural when you are told the c word....you question life and the other....but I am so touched by you all and your vigour for,life and not allowing this to beat you. I spoke to my friend last night who has kidney cancer and has spread to her bones and now her breast she thinks....she was so positive and said that they treat it as a chronic disease just like asthma or diabetes....it may not be totally curable but is treatable and you have to carry on with your life. Thank you all so much for your kind words. We will get there....just these next few months will be tough and I sooooo appreciate your kind words and finding this site has so helped me. Love to you all xxxx

  • Annette, thank you so much for sharing with me your diagnosis too. You show me that it is most livable with and I am so pleased you are doing well. I will always be there for my mum....she is, and always will be, my best friend. I will keep you updated....and thank you once again from the bottom of my heart. When mum is ready, I will introduce her to this site because it has helped me so much even though I only joined yesterday!! Love to you xxx Louise xx

  • Ann, I am so pleased you are doing well. Thank you for sharing your diagnosis. Love and god bless xxxx

  • Thank you to ALL of you who have answered. You can't know how much each and everyone of you have helped me tonight from not breaking down. You are all wonderful. I will keep you updated and thank you again from the bottom of my heart. Love Louise xxxx

  • Thinking of you m x

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