Im hoping some of my friends on here can help me with my latest diagnosis. I have (as radiologists report reads) Small new lymphnodes anterior to superior mesenteric vein about 9mm.There are omental and peritoneal infiltrations noted in keeping with progressive disease. The omental infiltrations are ill defined. The lesser sac has a 14x11mm growth.Between the gallbladder and stomach theres about a 10mm one.There are 2 on the right hypochondrium which are 7x6mm and 14x11mm.In the left upper abdomen there is one that's 14x11mm. They said surgery isn't an option only chemo.I will start next week with 6 rounds at 3weekly intervals.This is my 3rd lot of chemo I had 4 for NHL then 6 for O/C now another 6. Has anyone else experienced this diagnosis? I am very very traumatised and depressed and don't know what to do. I asked oncologist if I was dying she said ''no'' but what are my chances of pulling through again? Its Stage 4 now. Can anyone shed light and give me some hope please Love and hugs to you all Lynn xxxx
Cancers back after 2 years remission. - My Ovacome
Cancers back after 2 years remission.
Dear Lynn
I'm really sorry you've had this news and you're feeling so down. No wonder. It's disappointing when the tumours come back and frightening if they're in new places.
The good news coming through your post is that the oncologist says it's treatable though I can understand how you feel about tackling a third round of chemotherapy. Another thing that might help a bit is that you will still be the stage you started at. Staging remains as it was at diagnosis. I had two years break after my first lot of chemo and I'm now on my secone line. My oncologist said it was very positive and hopeful to have such a long break between chemotherapy and gives me a good chance that I might have a long remission next time. I really hope it will be the same for you.
I'm sorry I can't think of more things to say to cheer you up but I'm sending you love and hugs. xxx Annie
Hi Annie, thank you so much for your reply.I will go for the chemo and hope it works so scared again. I will keep in touch Love and hugs always Lynn xxxx
Oh dear , I'm feeling for you ! Not surprised you are down , as its a huge amount to take in ! I would echo what Annie has said above , and hope that you can be kind to yourself and you have every right to feel low but some positive bits are there , xxxxx
Thank you so much Dyana love xxx
Oh Lynn you do sound traumatised it must be so hard to hear, but you have been strong in the past and you can do it again and I'm sure when treatment starts you will feel more in control again. Keep batting the negative thoughts away and be kind to yourself. xx
Thank you so much I am trying to get my head around it all Wish I could be positive love xxx
Hi Lyn,
What a blow. You sought of start hoping that it has gone away after 2years don't you. Great that you have gone that long. Tho things have progressed and perhaps are more widespread the tumours sound relatively small. The fact that your oncologist is positive too is good news. You have responded well in the past no reason why you shouldn't again.
If it gives you hope my cancer is widespread. Tumours a bit bigger than yours now. I was diagnosed nearly 8 years ago, am about to embark on treatment 10!!!!!!!! Slowed down a lot but I am a lot older but I still live life. Further treatment is not a death sentence but a promise of life.
Lots of love, hope and support winging it's way across the oceans
Suex
Hi Sue, you are an inspiration indeed,wish I had your courage.Im older too 63yrs now but still active. That's what baffled me I look so well.Im sorry you have had so many relapses too but you are so strong and I admire you greatly.My oncologists here are very vague and actually sometimes too abrupt if you know what I mean.I like the term you use as ''Further treatment is not a death sentence but a promise of life'' That's so nice to hear. Keep well and God Bless love and hugs Lynn xxx
Hi Lynn,
It is good to hear from you again, but not so good hearing that your cancer is back, if you can manage to read the tribute I posted yesterday about Joyce (Revy) you will see that a recurrence isn't the end of the road...it is a very uplifting tribute. (to a lady that had twelve lines of chemo over nearlly fifteen years)
I know it is a worry... but I will pray for you Lynn... you are often in my thoughts there in South Africa...sending you my love x G x
Hi Gwyn, good to hear from you. Yes I did read the tribute you are a wonderful caring friend indeed. Im happy you think about me it means a lot. I will try hard to be positive Take care love Lynn xxx
Dear Lynn,
I am not one of these people that think you should be "positive" as if it's a magic formula (I don't think it is) if you want to cry... you cry... If you want to complain you complain...you've been (and still going) through a lot ( and I don't just mean OC ) this site is for support... so do keep in touch... we understand the misery and despair, but there is often light at the end of the tunnel...we are here for you (not in a gushy way) but because we too have either been there (or still are there).
To attemp to cheer you... the weather is appalling at the moment, especially from your neck of the woods but not too bad in Chester
I wonder if they talk about the weather as much in S Africa... lol
love x G x
Hi Gwyn, thank you for your kindness and offer of support. I will keep in touch Iknow I haven't been on much as things are still hard with the loss of my son. It will be 2yrs on 28th March and it feels like yesterday. I miss him so badly. Yes I see the weather at home gee you are taking some battering there. Its weird all over the world though Gwyn Floods and winds at home, snow feet deep in USA and then a volcano somewhere erupted and here we keep having horrid heat waves with a lot of fires and in the Cape there are floods ! Cant understand it really.Thanks for message love xxxx
I realised it was coming up to two years, also I remember you attaining your all clear just before (what a rollercoaster to be on) one minute up the next down
It must seem like time has stopped still.
I have just been reading that there is a fire in Wales the pylones were blown over with the wind... so started a fire DOH!
Stay warm xx
Oh dear I will have a look on Sky News Hope its not by my family love xx
The blaze was in Borth Bog West Wales xx
Ok thanks Gwyn at least its not near my family love xxx
Hi Millie, thank you I will try be strong but its a bit of a shock still as I was feeling great love xxx
So sorry to hear this. Hope that the chemo will get you back into remission.
Sending loads of hugs.
Love Mary xxx
What do you want from chemo?
LA
Hi Lily,Im sorry I don't quite understand your question. I have had 2 lots of chemo before so I know what its all about
Hi Lynn
I was diagnosed nearly 10 years ago and am on 5 th line chemo now. I'm lucky that it had not spread out of abdomen so far and i've been fit and well between treatment. I understand why you feel scared as I have felt very scared at times and in fact thought I was about to die soon before this chemo although I had few symptoms but its working and I feel reasonably well. Do your beat to acknowledge your fears and also keep up hope as well. Your disease sounds quite small although in different areas and its very positive that you lated 2years in remission as I only had 17 months
Love and big hug Francesca
Hi Francesca, thank you for your reply. You,ve been through a lot and atre very strong and brave.I know that feeling of thinking you,re going to die its horrid isn't it? Yes it looks like the growths are small and I hope the chemo can take them away. Thank you and hope you go on well with your treatment Love and hugs Lynn xxx
First a massive hug... That must be so difficult. I am a year plus into remission for stage 3c and am always scared of what you describe. I keep reminding myself that increasingly we are told OC is, and is treated as, a chronic disease. Something we can live with, not necessarily die from. It's not the public perception, but there are so many women on here who are a testament to it that I can start to believe it ... Sue/soapsuds is a super case in point, but there are many others going through their Xth round of chemo, or with a Stage 4 diagnosis. I think if I were you I would focus on the fact the onc considers it treatable, and dive back into the battle mindset you achieved the first time. It is important that you do, I reckon.
Love
Sue xxx
Hi Sue ,thanks for your reply. Saying it is a chronic illness makes it sound a lot less scarey.I was stage 3b first but now its classed as stage 4 .It was a heck of a shock because I have really been fine and busy with visitors and the festive season I didn't stop. I have been having bouts of sweating but not sure if that's a symptom or just pure anxiety.I hope you keep well and thank you again love Lynn xxx
Try not to overthink it. We all do our share of looking back to rationalise what signs might have forewarned us, and the reality is: none do!! Hindsight is a wonderful but hopeless thing... Focusing forward is better if one can just shake that tendency off - gird your loins again, you ARE going to beat this thing back again, Lynn!
Love
Sue xxx
Thank you Sue, you are a great help indeed. I think Im angry that the plans I had to return home to live in Wales are now to be forgotten.Ive been in RSA for 36yrs but want to go home to live so badly. Too scared to make a long term plan I suppose.My mind is in a whirl at the moment because like you say there is no warning! That's the scarey bit isn't it? I was once told that nobody knows when, where or how they are going to die. Very logical I know but I do think that when you are told you have the dreaded ''C'' it sort of brings it home that we are more likely to die first. Morbid aren't I? Sorry ... Sending love and hugs to you Lynn xxxx
Dear Lynn
I've been out of range of an internet signal for a week, so, read your post, but couldn't get a reply through .....West Wales, would you believe I'm so sorry you've got this latest worry but it's good that you've got some options. I know it must have been so hard for you, over the last two years, so allow yourself the time to rant, and then come back on here when you need a little pick-me-up. There's always someone who can sympathise or cheer you up.
Like, Gwyn, I often wonder how things are with you. Just wanted to say hold on there and I'm sending love, hugs and posivibes for a good outcome to the next lot of treatment.
Love Wendy xx
Hi dear Wendy, thank you for reply. Its good to hear from you. Ive had a lot of lovely answers as you will see it goes to show there are some wonderful people in the group. I am afraid really I don't know if I thought I would be unique and the dam thing wouldn't get me again but it did. I think im still in shock as Ive been so well and awfully busy with overseas visitors and the festive season etc So it did hit me like a ton of bricks.Reading Sues reply saying it can be classed as a chronic illness does make it sound better I think. I will start treatment this week sometime obviously not looking forward to it.Will keep in touch love and hugs xxxx
Hi Lynn
I think I will probably be starting chemo again soon - I have some pain and my lungs are playing up but like you I had a ridiculous notion that in me stage 4 was only a number and I would beat all the stats. It's tough but there is always hope and like Sue I look upon it as a chronic disease to live with not die of, still feels rubbish though and it pees me off as I am back at work full time and in a new building site of a house ~ how dare OC get in our lives and in the way!!! Big hugs to you lovely and all the luck in the world with your next treatment Amanda xxx
Hi Amanda, thanks for your reply. Im sorry you too will be getting treatment it just sucks this dreadful disease. Im trying to think like you and Sue but still get the cloud of doubt over me if you know what I mean. I wish they would find a cure there is one out there I know it Lets hope its soon. Good luck with your treatment too I hope all goes well for you love Lynn xxx
Hi Lynn its horrible when the OC comes back as you cant help but think here we go again . Like you I have diffuse smallish spots/tumours that have come back ,and I know everyones case is different ,but my oc said even without surgery it was manageable and controllable for a long time - so he said they are dealing with it as a chronic illness but one that is treatable and manageable. I think dealing with the emotional side is as hard as the physical bit . Its helped me to just take a day at a time and Ive switched off from measuring my life/days between each chemo session or scan - for my own sanity ! I hope your treatment goes well - keep smiling you sound a determined and brave person ( you were very brave asking about a prognosis not many of us can face doing that) with big hugs and good wishes
Fionaxx
Hi Fiona, thanks for your message. Hearing yet again that its treated as a chronic illness does lessen the fear even though its just a tad! I was in shock on Thurs but when I go back this week to start the chemo I will ask. Im afraid here in RSA the Drs are quite blunt not sympathetic at all which doesn't help.Is this your 1st relapse Fiona? They told me surgery wasn't an option and like someone said the growths are quite small.Heck Im not brave im a soft as a mop !! What stage were you? I was stage 3b then when it came back it was stage 4. My CA 125 was rising steadily for the last 2 years but they didn't do anything. Then in from Nov last year to now it had jumped 14 to 41. I wonder if the higher the CA125 is means the cancers worse....is that a silly question? Hope you coping with the weather there Take care Love Lynn xxxx
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Hi Lynn it seems good timing that your chemo is this week as at least youbcan ask more questions so hope you get some clear answers.really concerning that they ignored your CA125 levels . Did they do any scans during that time ? I had a problem with one of my onc's as when they told me I has relapsed she made it sound as if I was about to keel over the next day (!!!!) so I ended up seeing a senior onc who said no, I would be okay. Yes this is first relapse - bit of a shock as I was stage 1c and was told after surgery and chemo that it was cured - but it returned.
Hi Fiona,yes I had a CT scan on Thurs that's when they picked up the growths. Im sorry you were given such a false promise that's disgusting bless you. this oncologist I seen was a different one to my original one who told me when I first got the o/c'' Yes this is the one that,ll kill you '' Hell I nearly fell off my chair and ive been so negative ever since. Anyway,unfortunately he got cancer himself so is in treatment. I saw another oncologist and she too was quite to the point no sympathy at all.There aren't ant oncologists where I stay which is Witbank so I have to go to Pretoria its about an hr and a half away. I hope you get well soon Love Lynn xxxx
Hi Lynn gosh your oncologists sound less than sympathetic it must have been rotten . But, girl you are the one who is going to beat this thing - just envisage that chemo killing those cancer cells !!! Im in for chemo this week too so I will be thinking of you and goodluck
Fiona
Xxxx
Aw bless you! Yes they are a bit rotten aren't they? I hope you,re treatment goes well please keep in touch its been lovely chatting to you Good luck I,ll be thinking of you love xxx