Mental illness : I just need to get this off my chest... - OCD-UK

OCD-UK

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Mental illness

Phillips319 profile image
Phillips319

I just need to get this off my chest. I’ve noticed that people with multiple mental illnesses are attracted to me. It’s like they come to me with all of their problems. They tell me everything even when they are having a mental breakdown...it’s starting to make me wonder if there is something really wrong with me that I keep attracting these people...it’s like I’m trying to be a friend but everything just becomes too much too handle. I feel that if I ignore them and something happens to them, I would feel horrible because they don’t have anyone willing to listen... what do I do?

4 Replies

Hi Phillips,

Although it is very overwhelming, I believe it is a gift that God has given you to be a listening ear and helping hand to the people who come into your life.

In saying that, you do need to know when it’s time for you to move on and give people their space to work things out in their lives. We can’t put the whole responsibility on our shoulders to help them. Only God can truly help them. But God can and does work through people to accomplish his purpose.

Here are a couple scriptures that come to mind:

“Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” - Galatians 6:2

“Just as each of us has one body with many members, and not all members have the same function, so in Christ we who are many are one body, and each member belongs to one another.” - Romans 12:4-5

“I planted the seed and Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. He who plants and he who waters are one in purpose,a and each will be rewarded according to his own labor. For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, God’s building.” - 1 Corinthians 3:6-9

God bless you and be with you!

Some people just have sympathetic faces! I suppose one of them is you. It doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you, just that you come across as the empathic type that people feel they can confide in!

It's nice to feel wanted and useful, but other people's problems can feel a little too much, particularly if, like you, you're dealing with your own mental health problems. Keep the sympathetic ear, but feel entitled to take a step back if someone is putting too much on you. Just because someone unburdens themself on you doesn't mean you have to go all out to solve their problems.

There's no need to feel guilty. It's good to be a good friend, but you need to take care of yourself. Perhaps point them in the direction of professional help or support organizations. People are still responsible for themselves, so don't feel you have to shoulder that burden for them.

Thankyou for replying . I’ve been told by multiple people that I seem like the empathic type! Before I developed ocd/ anxiety , people would always come to me with their problems , which at the time I didn’t mind offering advice or helping. Now I feel overwhelming guilt for cutting people off even when I know I shouldn’t . I told one person in particular that they should seek professional help because all I can do is listen, nothing else..the person then writes multiple paragraphs about how no one has ever loved him or cared about him and no one will listen to him..he has said that he’s even tried to harm himself before , which is really what made me feel guilt bc I felt like if I completely ignore him, then somehow I contributed to him wanting to hurt himself. But everything about that person is too overwhelming for me...

Some people just don't know when to stop offloading onto other people! Don't feel bad. Some people are just too overwhelming and they can be so caught up in their own issues they don't think about others.

It's a sort of emotional blackmail for someone to say they'll harm themselves if you don't drop all your own concerns and listen up! They are responsible for themselves, not you.

Go on being a good listener where you can, but don't feel that you have to give and give at the expense of your own wellbeing.

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