I have suffered with OCD for 32 yrs of my life. I'm 45 in a month. I just wanted to write to say there is light at the end of a very long tunnel. I knew something was 'odd' when I kept having weird feelings when I touched the bathroom light cord, when I was a teenager. Thoughts would come into my head & the terrible feeling of 'something bad WILL happen' if I don't touch the light so many times. This scared me so I hid it from my family & friends well! I carried on living my life with no other problems. Until I had my daughter. I suffered with post partuum psychosis and was sectioned for 4 weeks in a psychiatric hospital. I missed my baby's 1st Christmas. I was put on sertraline & had 4 lots of ECT, were they basically re start your brain. This saved my life & sure has helped with my OCD. I still have it & it flares up when I'm stressed or tired or certain 'triggers' set it off. I had a relapse in 2019 & luckily wasn't admitted to hosp again. But my Dr upped my sertraline. I'm now currently having CBT therapy. It is helping massively. I just wanted to say, if you think you may have OCD, don't hide it or leave it like I did. It's nothing to be ashamed of & there is help out there. This is why I joined this forum, to help others & I know there's people out there that understand. Sorry its a long msge, thank you for listening & here for anyone that is struggling at the min. Take care. Anna 😁
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Hi Anna,And thanks for a beautiful message full of hope! You are right the earlier you get treatment or help the better. I am glad for you because ocd is life destroying. I didn't know about ocd until a few years ago when my husband's ocd deeply affected our family life. I started looking into it and have met people who managed to get it under control and teenagers too. I still hope that one day my husband will take the courageous step to ask for help and will be a family again. Like for you, the birth of our son brought everything back to the surface. It must have been really hard for you after the birth of your daughter Anna. But you are managing well now! Keep strong and take it one day at a time.all the best Anna.
Hi Cat, Thank you for your lovely reply. I Hope your husband gets the help he needs. OCD certainly is a living NIGHTMARE. Always here if you need a chat. Take care. Anna 😁
Hi AnnaThanks for your post which is very encouraging. My wife has suffered for many years and this has escalated over the past 2 years. She has had one course of therapy which wasn't much help and we've found more help online although we feel CBT with a therapist with more experience with OCD would help. She is also taking sertraline but again this doesn't seem to help the anxiety much.
Finding an experienced therapist is not easy and I wondered if you were able to share the name of yours. Many thanks and best wishes, Mike
Thank you for your reply. I Hope your wife finds the help she needs soon. It's so hard at the minute. I got my help through Wiltshire I aps service. Depending where you live? I go through my surgery. Speak to your G,P.
I know it must be a hard one to tell and even harder to live!
My daughter is 14 and I believe has had ocd of different for. Since the age of 7.
She is doing well now, still not able to touch us or things we have touched unless wiped but she is not having major panic attacks or breakdowns and now can do so much more that this time last year.
We, well I did accommodate a lot as I couldn’t bear to see her in which pain which was the wrong thing to do but then she would say I was being horrible to her and mean etc . She is with Camhs but lock down has delayed treatment again, she is on 125 mg sertraline and prior to
Lock down ha just been able to go into the clinic at CAMHs and went to school to visit ( didn’t touch anything !! But that was a
Major thing!! However lock down has stopped that but as soon as clinic starts again, she is going to do more
Challenges and some more EDMR so hopefully things will get better.
She doesn’t worry now about bad things, she just feels disgust about bogies, hair ( incase it has touched
Someone’s nose etc and touching things others have - covid hasn’t helped but she is not necessarily worried by it. It’s just non sensical really and she likes a lot of reassurance etc to see
If something is clean, yet she doesn’t
Kind
How dirty her room is as she knows no
One
Else has been in there. I am allowed in now to tidy so that’s another big step !!
Sertraline has def helped.
Not sure
About the CBT as getting her to do the exposures are hard.
Glad you are doing well and Thankyou for sharing that there is light xxxxx
Thank you for your lovely reply. I'm sorry to hear about your daughter. It must be so horrid for her and you. Seeing her suffer and not really able to do anything to help. OCD is a horrible thing to have to deal with, especially at her young age. I hope CAMMS help. Is your G.P supportive? Covid certainly is NOT helping at the moment, especially if she has contamination OCD. It sounds like your daughter has accomplished so much, you must be so proud. Always here if you ever need a chat. From someone that understands and has 'been' there. Take care xx
Hi sorry for delay in replying and Thankyou so much for your reply and words of encouragement.The GP basically said this is one for CAMHS and referred us.
CAMHS have been good as she is a
Lot better than this time last year but has been very h it and miss with covid.
The ERP is basically up to me and my daughter which is quite difficult as if she can’t do something and I say all the sit with the emotion and watch it and let it pass or try breathing, she really doesn’t appreciate it!!! With someone else I think it’s different so am hoping when visits are allowed again, the counsellor will start to do some exposure with her, she sets her tasks but if she can’t do them, I can’t force her. Meds have helped a lot, still using wipes to open a door and won’t allow us to touch her and yesterday ( she does have her period) we were going for a walk and the inside of her pocket touched a railing so we had to go home as she needed to change - I suppose at least she didn’t feel the need to shower because at one time because the trousers were touching her this would have been the case or a whole antibacterial wipe down.
May I ask what level of Meds you found helpful?
I am sure she will get there, it just scares me at the time she is
Missing but then at the
Moment everyone’s norm is a bit like it due to the pandemic .
Hi, sorry for late reply too! It sounds like your daughter is doing so well. It is such a horid thing to have to deal with. Least she has got you to support her through & getting the treatment she needs now. Even though it must be frustrating for you. Especially when your trying to help, watching her suffer must be horrendous ☹. I'm on 200mg of sertraline, which alongside the CBT, does seem to be helping??!! Take care. Xx
Thanks for being prepared to share your experiences, understanding and tips for recovery with the rest of us! It's really helpful!
Having that post partum psychosis must have been a gruelling experience. To be honest, I'm surprised that you were given ECT, as I didn't know that was still used. I once heard someone say that it was equivalent to kicking a household appliance to get it working again, and about as effective, but I've heard others say that it worked for them.
Do please continue to post on this forum. I'm sure that we could all use a bit more support and help! And thank you again.
Thank you for your reply. I like and use this forum, as its so nice to know there are other people out there that understand.
ECT has changed massively. I had 4 lots and each one is spaced out over a few days. I had a general anesthetic for each of mine, so obviously didn't feel a thing. They sit you down before and after. After you've come round, you have a biscuit & a cuppa!! The first 3 sessions, I don't remember much, as I was in a bad way. But on my 4th one, I remember leading up to it and waking up after. I had to complete a memory test before and after my 4 sessions to check my memory! All was good apparently. It was a very dark time, luckily I don't remember much at all and my daughter won't remember her Mummy not being there for her 1st Christmas ☹x Which still upsets me 7 & a 1/2 years later!
My partner was AMAZING & I could not have done it without him. Xx
Really good to hear from you and to know that you were helped by ECT. Having OCD can put you in a pit which can be very difficult to climb out of. Perhaps clinicians should consider ECT more often.
A baby's first Christmas is one of those little milestones that a parent doesn't want to miss, and it's understandable that it still hurts.
Thanks again for posting your message of hope. x x x
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