My ocd has changed tack slightly and is scaring the wits out of me...it’s got me thinking now that I’ve tricked two psychiatrists and im actually a psychopath. My new thought is maybe,and this is so hard to write,acting out on my harm thoughts is the only way I’ll get relief from the OCD. Please tell me this is just the OCD talking and I haven’t finally cracked,I’m in bits here.
OCD has changed tack: My ocd has changed tack... - OCD Support
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OCD has changed tack
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Pob76
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This is 10000000% just your harm OCD. When mine was at it's absolute worst i thought the exact same way. Your body is NOT gonna let you act these thoughts out. I use to, and still struggle with Harm OCD and it controlled my life for a long while. Your anxiety is through the ceiling, and is feeding you all these lies into your head. The more your frightened, the more the anxiety and OCD feed off of it. Go to my page if you want to and read my posts about my exact same struggle.
We are all here for you, and know exactly whay your going through. Please know your not alone.
It can feel overwhelming, but people with OCD don't act on their harm thoughts. I don't think psychiatrists are so easy to trick, and if you really were a psychopath you wouldn't have got one over on them!
It really is OCD. And people with OCD are caring, good people, and it's because we care and don't want to cause harm that we are safe to be around. These thoughts are upsetting just because you care about harming people and wouldn't do it.
Take a deep breath. This is all normal for OCD. In my first month of seeing my therapist I was worried that I was an evil person who was deliberately tricking her. I would picture myself slyly smiling after every session and even admitted these thoughts to her. Sometimes I still struggle with it but now I know how to better handle the thought and treat it for what it is - just another meaningless thought. OCD will always want you to believe that you’re a bad person, and the more you show it fear the worse it will act out. As others mentioned, people with Harm OCD don’t actually act on their thoughts. We’re actually less violent than the average person! Do something you enjoy today and take some time for yourself, you deserve it! You are so strong and such a fighter. I have complete faith in you that you can overcome this obsession and will not let OCD win. 💚
Firstly if you feel like you want to act out of harming yourself or others then you must contact your therapist straight away, if not your therapist then the crisis team, samaritans or go to A&E. I'm new to being diagnosed with OCD, I knew I had it with order or things and symmetry but I had no idea that it was to blame for my crazy thoughts so unfortunately I don't feel able to advise or help anyone but there are A lot of people out there who can. I hope you can find someone to help you.
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