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New here! Intrusive thoughts

Cash91 profile image
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Hi everyone. I’m new on here. A little scared of sharing things about my OCD. I got diagnosed when I was 15 and I’m now 27. I suffer from intrusive thoughts and It haunts me. I had therapy when I was 15 and I had it well under control, but then my mum passed away and I relapsed. Ever since then despite constant CBT I can’t seem to get the intrusive thoughts under control. I have a constant fear of loss and that something bad IS going to happen to me or My family. Im a deep sleeper so I also panic that I’ve done something in my sleep like go on my phone or sleep walk and hurt someone! The thoughts are horrible and make me physically poorly sometimes!Anyone have similar experiences? I’m looking forward to speaking with people who can understand better :)

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Cash91
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Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins

I think many of us here relate to what you experience. To lose your mother, particularly at such an early age, is traumatic in itself. I've had OCD for years, but losing my mother eight years ago made it worse.

Having intrusive thoughts feels like your brain is being bombarded. And losing someone close to you makes you all the more sensitive to it.

The fear that you've done something in your sleep is a common OCD one. I've not had it myself, but I have often felt that when I write something down I may have written something awful and want to read it again and again to make sure I haven't. I've been know to open envelopes so I could read what I'd written, and check emails just in case! I've also been afraid that I've said my thoughts aloud. To have OCD is to be constantly afraid of harming someone.

At least you're getting CBT. Try to make the most of it. A book I've found helpful is Mind over Mood by Dennis Greenberger and Christine A Padesky. It's not aimed just at those with OCD but has a lot to offer them.

Cash91 profile image
Cash91 in reply to Sallyskins

Thankyou very much for your Reply. It’s nice to know other people understand what goes through a persons mind who is tortured with OCD. I’ll check out the book :) thankyou!

RAB888 profile image
RAB888

Hi

Many of the problems we all have are because of the fact that we have all innocently been led to believe that our experience comes from the outside world when in fact we experience life from the inside out.

There is a new understanding in psychology that teaches people from the inside out and those who grasp this understanding have insights that lead to overcoming their life challenges

Danielle- profile image
Danielle-

Hi,

i am the same i was diagnosed at 12 and im now 25 ive been going to councilling for 10 years ive stopped about 3 years ago and im on medication i do worry if id text or call someone in my sleep and panic as ive often dreamed of doing so its hard and mentally draining although i cant imagine the feeling your going through over your mam im sorry to hear that i think i would relapse aswel been honest hope you feel better soon id rather be on medication for the rest of my life to have 5 good days out of 7, then to have 6 bad days without it i was really bad and came a long way its hard dont give up x

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