Intrusive thoughts, anxiety

I don't know if I'm writing this in right place but I've researched my symptoms and feelings and OCD has been the top diagnosis that I've seen........ it's a long story, but I will talk about what's bothering me for me to write this today, I keep getting bad frightening intrusive thoughts, mainly a repeated word or phrase that is bad and unwanted, it makes me feel physically sick and I have had thoughts about suicide because all I want is a peaceful mind, and it's so hard! I've read up loads of different ways and techniques to deal with this, and even when I try to stay hopeful my mind goes back to sucicdal thoughts because of this..............I think I just need support and some help, comments are welcome, xx

9 Replies

oldestnewest
  • Hi Sunlightqueen

    I'm sorry for your suffering. Reading your post it seems your OCD has not been diagnosed. You have the intrusive thoughts form of OCD called ruminations. These unwanted thoughts are caused by trigger words or images that causes us anxiety or fear. These thoughts are not you.

    You need to go to see your Gp to get diagnosed and to the right medicine for you and to get a referral for CBT therapy. If you are feeling suicidal, please phone the Samaritans and Mind for support. Do you have friends who you can trust to talk to. When I was going through what you are experiencing now I had the support of people I could trust and who were not judgemental- a safe place where I could cry and be vulnerable.

    I want to say to you or anyone reading this post if the medicine the Dr prescribes is not right because of side effects or bad reaction, please go back to your Gp. There are others medicines the Gp can prescribe. It may take time to find the right meds at the right dose. The same goes for therapists. If you feel you can't trust your therapist Don't be afraid to ask for another one. Timid as I was, I asked to change my therapist because I didn't find him empathetic. The same goes for GPS. So Don't give up and Don't take no for an answer. This is about your mental well being. You know when you are not feeling well. You need to be emphatic and persistent.

    If you do have intrusive thoughts, try not to react to them. I know it's hard, but you need to 're-train your mind. Think the opposite is true. Speak it aloud. Think the opposite of what you Don't want. Do something that takes your off those thoughts. Watch a programme, film or listen to songs you like. Call on a friend for support. What techniques have you used?

    This thing can be conquered.

    Please let me know how you get on.

  • Thank you so much for your comment.. When I made this post 7 days ago it upsets me remembering how much of a bad state I was in....when it all started I tried talking to my partner on day 1 and just got everything off my chest, about my past and anything else, and how I was feeling, and he was and still is a really big support, I couldn't of done it without him and the support of pages like this..

    On day 1 till day 3 I was excessively researching OCD and intrusive thoughts, and Anxiety and desperately trying to find someone with the same or similar symptoms to me, and I was relieved that there was people like me, and I wasn't the only one, and I felt like in the end I wasn't going crazy and that made me feel alot calmer! And less anxious, but some days it still is a argument in my head, and doubts and that leads to having to re read everything on websites about OCD and anxiety.

    But now i just feel worn out, and mentally tired, because I really do want help and to see my GP but I find it hard to talk to someone that I don't know in person, and I'm scared that I will just sit there and get anxiety and look stupid.

  • You have a mixture of positive & then finally, negative here, I would agree with the supportive comments that encourage you to see your GP, you seem to have good insight into your condition but lack specific positive intervention to restore your well-being & ability to function in peace. Wishing you well,

    Felicity.

  • Please see your doctor as soon as you can

  • Hello my lovely I completely agree with the previous posts you need to go and see your doctor as soon as possible I know what it's like to suffer with intrusive thoughts and because of the thoughts have thoughts of suicide it can be incredibly debilitating and make you feel sick and disgusted with yourself but there is no need to feel that way after suffering with intrusive thoughts for a long time I finally went to a doctor about a month ago who referred me to counselling and for the first time in my life I discussed with the counsellor how I've been suffering and the thoughts that I had it was the hardest thing I've ever done but it was worth it I was told I wasn't a monster I was told it was normal and told I was the least likely person to hurt somebody because of how upset the thoughts made me it's a healing process you don't need to tell you dr everything just that you need to talk to someone he may give you some meds that can take a couple of weeks to maybe a month to start working but when I start working it feels like the pressure is been taken off slightly buy speaking to a professional is the best thing to do good luck and keep us updated

  • Thank you for the comment, I'm glad you did see a doctor and you got the help you needed, I'm finding it hard to make that first step, because I get constant doubts like: " do I really have a problem" " what if it's not ocd" and it really drains me.. How did you manage your first appointment with your GP?

  • Thank you lovie, I realised that I HAD too go to the DR's when I drank a bottle of whisky on my own to feel something else other then disgust and sadness but it only made me worse and made the thoughts of suicide even stronger , I have an incredibly supportive husband but he wouldn't support me drinking away my thoughts , I realised that I wasn't living I was obsessed and stuck in the cycle and when my anxiety levels get raised I still am it took a lot but I knew I had to do it , and what you said about , doubting , do me a favour go to google and type in "the doubting disease" and see what comes up and the 'what if ' thing that's my mantra what if I step out in front of a car what if I'm mad what if I'm loosing it what if this isn't OCD what if I have a panic attack in town what if I have made myself think ive got OCD what if what if what if ALLLL the time , Any more questions please ask xx

  • Hi Sunlightqueen

    If you are anxious about seeing your Gp, ask your partner to go with you for support. Before you go write down everything you want to tell the Dr. A written reminder will help you if your mind should go blank and your partner could perhaps prompt you or speak on your behalf.

    You know you have OCD, I know I had OCD before it was properly diagnosed so Don't doubt yourself that you Don't have it. The only way to get treatment for it is through the Dr. So you must go and get a diagnosis. You need to be brave!

  • Have you talked to your GP about it? Do you feel comfortable with others? Can you sidetrack these thoughts with simple things like looking forward to an ordinary meal? Sorry if this doesn't help, just feel your need for some comments,which is the purpose of this site!

You may also like...