The Blog with No Name

Hiya peeps.

It has been noticably quiet on here just lately. Not sure why. For my part, I have been just being doing what is necessary without over doing. Whilst I have had chance to pop on here and have a butchers and give my ten pen'orth that has been about as much as I have managed.

So I thought I would updaten on My Life with RA....

I have often felt (perhaps unjustly) that I have no contribution to make because firstly I am newly diagnosed and my experience is limited in both the RA, the treatment and treatment outcomes.

I have often felt (probably unjustly and unfairly) that unless I have raging symptoms and horrendous side effects I have nothing to say. Indeed I have been known to have written a blog without reference to rheumatoid arthritis at all!!!

I have not had the experience of a DMARD failure, or incessant and debilitating side effects. I have the run gamut of pain, discomfort, fear of both diagnosis and prognosis, and experienced nausea, re-bound headaches, prejudice and the vagaries of the NHS system. However, I would hope that I do have a contribution to make (feel free to disagree).

I do believe in the theory of self-fulfilling prophecy and learned helplessness. Whilst I cried into the armpit of my beloved when I diagnosed, and have oft felt the desire to end it all through all the pain and discomfort, on the whole I have tried to tackle this blooming godawful disease with a fair degree of positivity. I felt I have faced it fist first, and kicked the blooming thing into touch, on the whole.

Whilst I embrace the medical model of treatment, I also believe in the benefit of the alternative and complementary methods of approach. In terms of a change of diet (when the devil isn't sat on your shoulder shouting at you to eat that poisonous jam doughnut). Also in terms of attitude (when you feel strong enough to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again - sounds like a cue for a song!). It's not easy because despite all the support, advice and help you can get, in the end it all comes down to YOU! In the end, it is YOU. YOU stand alone at the end of the day. You have to find the strength to believe in yourself. You have to keep looking to find ways of propping yourself up and keep going.

It struck me today, in the middle of an executive board meeting with our Accountants - yes me, Mr Silageman and son and heir popped along to peruse our year end accounts. It struck me, when my other half said something along the line of "mmmm Ju (that's me!) is fine most days........" explaining my "condition" to the accounts (who is going to help with the DLA application believe it or not). Yes I keep digressing..

Yes It struck me - oh my god or OH MY GOD do you have any idea how much it has taken me to get here today? No, he hasn't. No idea at all. It's not his fault. How can he have? How can anyone? We say so often no-one knows what it is like to have RA unless they have it!.

Sympathy comes in bucketfuls, empathy would come in handy if you're lucky.

So the message of the sermon today peeps is. Believe in yourself, in your own strength, in your capabilities and abilities.

For me this is all a bit serious and intense. I am sure normal nuttiness will be resumed as soon as possible.

I am not entirely sure what I intended to write today. Today I have let my fingers do the talking... walking? whatever!

Sermon over. see ya laters...

Peace and love Julie xxx

[Sharon56]

Hi Julie well I love reading your blogs even if you dont mention RA. I havent blogged lately I think I have writers block. Sharon.

[Hidden in reply to Sharon56]

Hi Sharon. Thank you. You know there is nothing worse than bloggers block - I think it's all those tablets we take!!!

Julie x

[Hidden]

Hi Julie, very well put and so right. It is in the end upon our shoulder to be strong and positive in order to lead a better life. Nobody will do that for us, not even our loved ones no matter how much they try to understand and do for us.

It's something it took me a long time to learn, I too felt like giving up and taking the easy way out feeling like a burden to the ones closest to me. But, I had no intentions if giving in or letting RA beat me.

On the other hand I couldn't beat RA either so it was a matter of coming to terms with what was happening to me and allowing it to be a part of my life without it taking over, which is extremely difficult at times.

I like your Bloggs Julie, they bring a touch of humour to the site which lets face it is something we all need in life.

Keep up the Blogging that what I say.

Take care

mand xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi Mandy, well you started me out on this positive journey, along with LynW you have been very inspiring in your outlook.

I tend to tackle most things with humour - laughter is the bes medicine - but I know it can sound a bit flippant sometime!

i shall keep blogging.... thank you

Julie xx

[Hidden]

lovely blog as usual x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

THank you Alison. x

[Andrea_Shapiro]

So beautifully eloquent & touching. Yours are the loveliest messages left x

[Hidden in reply to Andrea_Shapiro]

Thank you Andrea, it just sort of comes out...

[Mel_]

Julie. Well done for such an honest and heart felt blog. I was reading Winnie the Pooh to my son the other week and I read the following and burst into tears...I think it applies to all of us one way or another....“Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. Christopher Robin to Pooh” x

[Hidden in reply to Mel_]

Thanks Mel. I used to love reading Winnie the Pooh, and of course Christopher is so right!

Take care Julie xx

[sylvi]

Julie,

I agree nobody knows what we're going through. Like Mand i've felt that i would be better off out of it, but i too refuse to give in to the b***dy thing that is RA. I keep being told to accept what i can do and forget what i can't do. Easier said than done, i want to be able to do what i can within reason, but it won't let me.

They spend a fortune on cancer, but don't they see RA is as much as a problem as cancer. It has so many other side affects as well.

Today i've got emergency appointment with the hospital and there's going to be a fresh pair of eyes looking at me, so hopefully i'll come away with renewed hope. I can wish can't i.

Julie keep on blogging, i love to hear about your family and life down on the farm.

My best to you and anyone else here on this site.

Sylvia. xx

[Hidden in reply to sylvi]

Hi Sylvi, sometimes a fresh pair of eyes on you is a really good thing, as some consultants get to now you to well. I hope all goes well today.

Take care

mand xx

[sylvi in reply to Hidden]

new eyes new diagnosis.Fibromyalga, not sure if the spelling is right. Spent over 21/2hrs down the hospital, but at least i know its not in my head. Been saying for months that nobdy was listening to me, at long last they are. Got to see gp about drugs, hospital doctor is faxing gp about them, i need to make appointment tomorrow. Also got to see someone else about help, that will come in post i presume. It was very informative today. Need to have relaxation and exercise to go into too.

I've read on here about fibro anybody got any tips that will help me short term will be appreciated.

Just goes to show how a different doctor can make sense of how your feeling.

Sylvia. xx

[Hidden in reply to sylvi]

Hi sylvi, I'm happy you finally have a diagnosis but so sorry you have Fibro.

Yes there are a few people on here that have Fybromyalga, summer and fibrojulie I believe there may be others too.

I suggest you do a small blogg as that will help you get the comments and helpful tips you need.

Take care

mand xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

RA-fibro, sorry not fibrojulie!

making my own names up now!lol.

mand xx

[Hidden in reply to sylvi]

Thanks Sylvi x

[HarleySue]

Hi Julie - lovely blog as usual and hit the nail on the head for all of us I'm sure. I too have an emergency appt today for re assessment as although on MTX & anti tnf CIMZIA as well as prednisolone,naproxyn,mepredec,amitriptyline with paracetamol, codeine & oramorph as back up still in terrible pain and at my wits end. Trouble is I will sit in front of consultant & either dry up or cry & come home more frustrated than ever ! Now have positive attitude after reading all your blogs and will try and keep strong for a little longer. I was always such a strong person and want that back.....I'll let you al know how it goes and good luck Sylvie.

Love to you all

Sue xx

[Hidden in reply to HarleySue]

Hi Sue - sorry about all the pain you have, but I am glad about the positive attitude :-). I really makes a difference; Good luck today, hope things get sorted. Yes let us know how you got on.

Take care

Julie xxx