Need a rant... I am CEV Clinically Extremely Vulnerable and have been shielding for a year.
Apart from a couple of days away in September I haven’t really left the house for a year. When I have gone out I have found it extremely stressful as people do not adhere to social distancing/ masks Over Noses etc
I have just heard a neighbour complaining that I never go out. He is actually the boyfriend of my neighbour but spends lots of time there (including the first 2.5 months of this year with his small child for 50% of that time even though it is a one bed flat in a terrace with neighbours above and no soundproofing or carpets). I live alone and am in no bubbles
My furniture has shaken. My head has exploded. I have spent over £100 on white noise machines.
They are indeed... no idea but then none of us probably had much idea of what it means to have autoimmune disease until we were sideswiped by it ourselves.
I printed out a notice and stuck it to my flat door which is located within a small block of 12 with communal entrances and stairways at each half; serving six flats each.
I also was told I am in the ‘highest risk’ category if I get Covid-19.
I shielded for six weeks only. It is advised, not mandatory, not law.
I simply take a mask with me and also bought ‘At High Risk’ badges.
I go out at quieter times and use routes that are less populated, especially now that (in Scotland) we are free to go away from home but within our local authority area.
I believed that for me the benefits of going out far outweighed the risks of catching Covid-19.
We are told to weigh risks against benefits with drug therapy versus untreated RD, so why not with staying home versus going out?
I agree completely. Although I do not live in a flat, but a house and neighbours are not a problem for me. My choice regarding leaving my house, is similar to yours, and I also live in Scotland 😀
You’re a better person than me - I’d be writing him a letter explaining EXACTLY why I don’t go out and how rubbish it is having to live with health issues!!
But you’re right, selfishness is rife these days. And it’s not pretty. Hope you feel better after a little rant and that it doesn’t linger in your head too long x
I'm on the CEV group too, but go out every day. I go at quiet times to quiet places, always outside. If anywhere is busy, I just move on and keep my distance. I have a mask with me but don't always wear it outside and I carry hand gel. Being outside lifts my spirits, the benefits outweigh the risk in my view. Getting outside for a wee while may help you and is advised by Scotgov for those in the CEV group.
I was finding this difficult too, even though my neighbours weren’t noisy(so my husband said), being in the house all day I started to focus on every little noise. I made the decision, like others, that I wasn’t going to stay inside after the first 6 weeks as my mental health was suffering. I’m classed CEV too but had to do what was right for me, of course I took precautions but I knew I couldn’t carry on like I was. I hope you will feel able to go out more now and it will help you like it has helped me.
I am sorry you have a strange neighbour. We live next door to the modern day Munsters. Not joking either. Or should I call them The Flouters? Five lots of visitors inside their house together this afternoon and more on Sunday. Last thing you want is someone making unnecessary remarks. I’m in a really bad area for case numbers and it’s always been like that. I was advised by my rheumy nurse to stay in as much as possible due to the bad area. House is in a sweet cul de sac and neighbourhood but very close are some areas which are awful about five miles away and have high cases. Leeds and Bradford are close. This West Yorkshire and northern belt across the width of the U.K. is the worst at present along with Glasgow, I can see on the casemaps. If I lived where cases were low and people were respectful (they walk right up to you here) I’d feel easier about going out.
Depends on what RA meds you have too as to if you are very immunosuppressed and any other health issues. Let’s hope the cases are going to drop right down and even more people vaccinated. We’re doing so well there. Selfishness is in abundance and I’ve removed myself virtually from several people online etc as they were/are totally unpleasant. Not just to me but if anyone as they are angry and itching for a fight. One neighbour got so weird in December when I said I was shielding and asked him not to walk up to us in our garden. I was really decent the way I asked him too. It was at the time that wasn’t allowed anyhow! I said the next day I wasn’t being mean when he was close to our garden doing some weeding (excuse to come close again) in the back shared road, and he sneered at me and said nothing and not even a simple apology. I said .. I’ve tried nicely and I’m not getting through here .. and went inside. Hope it’s safer for you .. for us all ... to go out soon. 💗
I agree with you entirely. Sadly, we have to live with inconsideration, selfishness, ignorance and pigheadedness. I don't know what the answer is but I do know after a year of complaining myself about all the selfish people there are around it hasn't made the slightest bit of difference. All it has done has made me stressed so I am trying to let it wash over me now. Easier said than done.
Thanks people. I have severe mobility problems so am usually housebound in winter, so in a lot of ways the ‘shielding’ hasn’t impacted me that much, as it is pretty much my normal. On the days I am well enough to go out, it is usually when it is sunny, so the park is heaving. I am very lucky in that I live across from one, so sit and watch my trees for an hour or two every morning with copious amounts of coffee. Have also bought tons of houseplants.. the issue really is that this guy is a DK...
No vaccination for that one unfortunately Take care x
Can't understand people. Why do they always have to judge others like that. It is your decision whether to shield or not and they have no business questioning it. Trouble is there are people like that wherever you are. As my mother always used to say "Rise above it". My neighbours are horrendous too, so I just have to ignore them even though some days it makes your blood boil, doesn't it?
Saadly the best and worst of peoples' behaviour has shown itself this year.Think the best has won mostly. However there are some who feel your business is theirs
when it certainly isn't.
We had neighbours move in several years ago the woman of the house had a mission to keep reporting us to the local borough council.
All complaints were dismissed, and my hubby put a legal screen up to prevent her noseyness.
Up to you but you could keep a "noise diary" ( think least couple of month's worth )then report to your local borough council about the unreasonable noise.
As suggested by others, now better weather is arriving try to go out when less people
for your mental health, not to prove him wrong.
Better to ignore his comments and make your care priority.
Enjoy spring then summer as best you can .
😊
Thanks... usually do ignore him, but doing my PIP renewal atm so stress levels are considerably higher than usual. I’ve looked into soundproofing but I would have to pay someone to clear my rooms of all furniture etc. pull my carpets up, put wadding in, then relay carpets and put everything back. When I moved in I put in the densest possible underlay, but could no way afford to get it ‘properly’ soundproofed.. it is worse because downstairs have no carpets or soft furniture, so all noise is amplified.
I very helpfully sent her a booklet on how to minimise noise pollution a couple of years ago Don’t know if she ever read it.
We manage to coexist tbf, but her boyfriend is a DK.. so what can you do!!
I can't understand why he would complain that you don't go out?
Pandemic or no pandemic it's a really weird thing to complain about. Why would he mind if you're sat in your own house? Even somebody who doesn't have an autoimmune condition or indeed any health problems at all is 'allowed' to sit at home in their own home if they want to, surely?
It doesn't even make any sense to me. It would be like a neighbour complained that they don't like my hat or something else completely irrelevant to their life.
I'm sorry you're going through this. Having difficult neighbours is very stressful.
Thank you FlowersAG .. . it is bizarre. I think he must have ‘unresolved issues’. Why would you chose to focus on a single woman with health issues??? Projection probably, but Jesus....
Sometimes you just have to get it off your chest! I visited a friend in her garden for first time in absolutely ages yesterday and when I mentioned how nice it was to a very old friend of mine he said he felt good too blah blah cause he did the same, well I know full well that he has seen people when not allowed to do so and he plays golf when its open. How would a lot of people cope if they were in our situation as CEV!!!! Some people all too quick to judge😤and as for social distancing its out the window in a lot of places! rant over 😂
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I am a newbie wishing to share a rant!
Rant alert! Sorry...
'Another sleepless night' -update
Both of us at the hospital this morning.
