Lots of things

[Ccrowlu]

So I’ve been in a depressed state for a little while. I tried to post it but my app glitches and wouldn’t let me post anything. I just now deleted and redone loaded it so I’m hoping for the best. First off.... I got my drivers license!! I mean kinda no point in it because I’m not really allowed to drive alone much still but hey I get to go alone sometimes. Second I kinda suck at the whole blog thing. Turns out I don’t really actually have very much to say and I don’t know anything about how to run a blog so that’s kinda not happening. Also we moved again!! Like two weeks ago. We live in South Dakota right now. And lastly my parents say we are gonna be staying in a hotel room for winter which honestly I can’t let happen because we already live in such a small space and I don’t need to constantly have to hear my moms heavy breathing. So I’ve come up with an idea and I honestly was hoping to get your opinions. I’m almost eighteen, only like five or six months to go. And my mom was emancipated when she was like fifteen and she did fine. I found an apartment that’s a decent price and is actually a really nice two bedroom apartment. So my idea is that they could emancipate me so I can get my name on the lease, we can live like roommates while I work paying half the rent and stuff and then when it’s time for them to go to the next job I find a new FEMALE roommate and stay in the apartment. I plan to pitch the idea to my parents tomorrow when they finish eating dinner. I gonna try to explain everything I’ve felt since we started living in the camper and tell them the talk is really important and I need them to not interrupt me and wait till I finish. I prepared a list of reasons why I should be emancipated and all that (and honestly some of the reasons are so phoned in) and ill be putting them on here too. I would love to hear your advice on this and if you were in my parents shoes what would you do?

1. Becoming an adult a few months early isn’t going to change how difficult it’ll be.

2. I can have a bit of time to learn how to cook the basics in a real kitchen

3. I need stability and that’s something they can’t give me

4. I’ll learn how to be responsible enough to adult alone

5. We can split the rent and find me a roommate (female) when they need to move

6. I can take control of my life and really grasp onto what I want in my future

7. I’m miserable in this camper and I’m very lonely and really sick of it.

8. I can get my ged when I turn eighteen if I stay here

9. Any necessary furniture or other stuff I need can be collected and kept with me while we live together.

10. Heat and electricity is paid

11. Rent is only 900 some dollars a month not including the dogs payment (which I’d be happy to cover)

12. Laundry facility is on site and mom won’t need tons of quarters because they accept cards in those machines

13. I can get a good stable job and save for my future as well as care for myself.

14. I really need this

15. Nobody wants to live in one hotel room with two beds, no privacy, and three people (two of which will be together a lot)

16. I may not be ready in your eyes but I know I am and I know I can do this, I just need you to believe in me.

17.I can also take self defense classes and get a taser to protect myself from sex trafficking

18. I’ll need to be emancipated before we move in because my name will have to be on the lease and I have to be legal to do that.

19. You can get that camper you want with the giant living room sooner because I won’t live with you and you won’t have to find a bunk house camper anymore.

20. It’s for the better for all of us. It was bound to happen eventually but I really need this now.

[Ccrowlu]

Btw. The sex trafficking thing is because it’s so common around here they have billboards all over the place warning tourists of it.

[Hidden]

As a Mother myself, that all sounds good reasoning! Can you add anything specific about it being good for your physical health. i.e management of heating up/down/ constant etc? Good luck!!!!

[Ccrowlu in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. At least I know I have a slight chance at convincing them this is the best thing to do

[Hidden in reply to Ccrowlu]

If you can get them to hear you out and you can also hear them out, it will maybe leave room for further discussion another day. Sometimes parents have to be worked on. I expect you know what their issues might be already so maybe be prepared to listen and acknowledge them before defending your position. I think your points sound very well thought out, but Mums can be very protective of their daughters!

[Hidden]

You my young friend have covered everything and sound like you’re very well prepared to give “adult” a red hot go. I’m hoping others will come on board to support you. Then you can show your “adults” all of those who believe you’re doing the right thing for yourself (and them) - via this forum. Good luck, you’re well organised and will do well. If you’ve already contemplated and resolved #SexTrafficking, then minor details about “healthy cooking” should be easy. I sincerely wish you much success, and I’d love to know how this works out for you. xx cheers Deb

[Ccrowlu in reply to Hidden]

Wow. You and my mom have the same name. 😂😂😂

[AgedCrone]

Can you find some trustworthy adult in the area you are planning on renting (church minister?School administrator? Children's services ?) to talk through your plan & let them point out any hitches that might arise. As you are still a minor you may not be legally allowed to take on a rental lease....even if your parents offer to emancipate you - as they have no permanent address that may not be possible.

It sounds a good plan though, , especially as you will be able to get regular health checks by living in one place for longer than a few months.

The hotel room arrangement does sound very unsatisfactory....you would be presumably be eating take away all winter? Not ideal.

You say the apt rent will be about $900pm. How much would the hotel cost?

Maybe the apt would save your Mom& Dad a few bucks? Look into that side if it, everyone likes to save money.

But as Norisa says....hold fire on getting upset if your parents aren't exactly enthusiastic when you first tell them. Listen to them, chill, then try to sort out the reasons they give not to go along with you.

Just an idea........If you can afford $450 per month could you maybe get a room living with a family in a house for the winter? Or even with somebody needing a bit of help in the house. Look into anything that both you & your parents can agree on. You'd have your own room & some company.

Do let us know how things go when you speak to your parents.

It's a difficult one Ccrowlu.

[Ccrowlu in reply to AgedCrone]

I don’t know anybody here. And the closest person I know is three an a half hours away and my parents won’t let me drive to her. She is eighteen though and is looking to get out of her parents house soon. And my family doesn’t like each other. And I haven’t seen most of them for years either way, they are all practically strangers since my grandpa died. I’m getting a job at Walmart and I looked up what my monthly income would be and it’s around 1,900 so I’d definitely be able to afford it. As long as I have an emancipation form signed I’m legally an adult. That’s how my mom survived when she was emancipated. She was able to get an apartment with some friends and then like seven years later met my dad.😁 I don’t think we’d eat take out the whole time but honestly I wouldn’t complain if we did 😂😂 I have eating issues and fast food is basically all I eat already. Not healthy I know but I’m working on it and just when I get a good groove going with it we move and the fast food from the driving puts me back at square one.

[AgedCrone in reply to Ccrowlu]

Well if you are going to work at Walmart they will have an HR department. I have a friend who lived in Chicago...she worked for Walmart, & transferred to Florida for the winter. I think that is only for retirees,but once you are working there you can I see what goes on.

Try to make an appointment to speak to somebody in Walmart's HR, and if they will confirm you have the job, that should convince your Mom that you are responsible enough to rent your own place, & ease the way a little.

Just don't be so hell bent on getting the apartment that you fall out with her. You only have one Mom.

Maybe not a good idea to push about getting in touch with your friend if it would upset things. This time next year( Iknow at 17 that is FOREVER) you will be able to get in touch when you are settled.

Slowly slowly & it will work out I'm sure.

[Ccrowlu in reply to AgedCrone]

Thank you for your advice. Really to everyone who’s commented so far. It’s really been helpful. I’m trying to contact my brother to ask him the best way to communicate with our parents because he’s just naturally closer to them