Feel let down with work

[Phoo2]

I am over a year in with no biological working for me and I have forced myself to go in even when I had horrendous flare ups - cos I don’t want to be sitting at home feeling sorry for myself - when the deep head of the school pops in and says I look as tho I have been struggling and not coping . I say it’s been a nightmare and she tells me to tidy my office to give the impression I am coping! I am struggling / why do I need to give impression of coping??? She made me feel bad for even trying to do a good job.. also even with help from younger member of staff - tidying my office made both arms hurt and I had to take painkillers and put on heat patches!!!! Wtf - how is that helping??

[Phoo2]

I feel like I should complain - what do u think??

[3LittleBirds2 in reply to Phoo2]

I think you can make that decision only, do you have a union or HR where you can get some advice. Maybe in a roundabout way they were trying to help you....even thought it doesn’t seem that way? It’s tough at times working with condition...you’re very very lucky if your employer totally understands but a lot of the time it’s just lip service! You have rights however make sure you check them out before you complain. Good luck 😊

[oldtimer]

i'm afraid my reply to her would have been to ask her to do it for me - as the reason why it was untidy is because it hurts too much to do it! It was insensitive of her, but probably said with the best intentions of making you feel better! She probably feels better herself when her office is tidy, so thought that you would too.

Perhaps next time you see her you could say "Thanks for the suggestion of tidying my office, but actually, it hurt so much to do it that it set me back again rather than making me feel better!" With a smile, of course so that she doesn't feel put down.

People do NOT UNDERSTAND! You have to tell them all the time that the pain and difficulty is there and you struggle to achieve things.