I'm new here and starting off with a moan, sorry. I thought you might understand where I was coming from. I'm 26, diagnosed with RA two years ago about a year after I first started getting pain but I was always tired before that. Pain is now pretty much under control so my nurse has said they won't be looking to change my meds as I'm on the highest dose I can have of hydroxychloroquine and methotrexate and I'm pretty stable. But the fatigue is driving me insane. And it's true the pain and swelling don't happen very often now, that is until I do something out of the ordinary and then I suffer for it.
I started a Master's degree in February and I can do the work but I'm struggling with the pace of it. I'm thinking of quitting it which is so unlike me but I can't take the constant spiraling into fatigue and depression because I can't keep up.
I can't see how this Master's degree will be much use anyway. I thought maybe I'd go for a different job in the future but that's unrealistic, I couldn't keep up with being employed somewhere. I am self-employed and that seems to work ok but the RA does interfere with it a bit. I thought about developing another part time job on the side but I'm crippled with 'what's the point'.
I'm in a really low place. Also cut back on a voluntary commitment that is very dear to me because I just can't do it. Not sure what to do. Not sure what I want. Having some counselling in September but in the mean time I just feel utterly useless. I can't see that this is ever going to get any better. Rest of life not so great either, live with parents, supporting them where I can around house, financially (when I have any money to spare) and with caring role - Dad's had terminal cancer for 10 years and could be ill for years yet. Can't see through this right now.
Thanks for listening x