Pain pain go away and don't come back another day either.xxxxxxxxxx

Pain pain go away and don't come back another day either.xxxxxxxxxx

I have had a terrible of late. Last week i dropped a breeze block on my toes. They were badly bruised and still are,they swollen and still sore a week later. My back is still causing me a lot of problems as well. I have pre-op this Friday for the operation on my back and next week i get the MRI the surgeon wanted before he operates.

Yesterday was a bad day,had a disagreement with my daughter because i was having a bit of of a pity party because i was in so much pain. I won't into the whole conversation,but she say she said i have to think positive and then i will get brighter and not drag the family down with her. It was very hard and the decision i have made is every time anyone asks i am fine. She had just split up with her boyfriend as well so that maybe because of how she spoke to me.. I was very upset as you can imagine.

I am in a awful lot of pain with the back,RA,Fibro and so exhausted as well. I went into the garden and did some gardening to take my mind of my daughter. Anyway of course i overdid it didn't i,and i have been down here all night and have only had a couple of hours sleep.

I am seeing rheumy this morning then tomorrow the pain clinic and Friday pre-op at another hospital.

I wish you all a painfree day and hugs for you all.xxxxxx

12 Replies

  • All the best for your op sylvie. ..I find stress doesn't help pain either ...even tho your daughter is goin through a bad time ...she will eventually get over it in time an hopefully find someone else. ..but with rhumatoid etc it never goes away we just deteriorate which I'm finding this year ...sure she didn't mean it spiteful just needs to take it out on someone. ..irs usually us mum's an here's to a pain free day one day xx

  • Morning sylvi.

    You seem to be having such a tough time latley. Sending you hugs....

    Sorry to hear about the tension with you and your daughter. I am sure both of you were just in a bad place with your individual problems yesterday and she is probably upset and frustrated that she can't help with your pain and therefore worried for you. I know my daughter finds it hard to be 'helpless' with my issues and she often expresses this as frustration and anger towards me and is very rergretful afterwards. It's something I recognise that I have done many times with my mother in relation to her illness too at times when I have had my own issues.

    Try not to let the tension carry in to another day if you can. As you need your energy focused on your busy week of appointments.

    Don't be tempted into telling everyone your fine if you're not, we all need people's support, but maybe include something positive when telling your daughter how you lots of pain today but toe is a little better even if it's not true just so she hears that everything is not hopeless which will help her frustration and worry.

    I hope that's not being too preachy sylvi and I don't pretend to know yourself and your daughter's relationship but having my own daughter who has her own issues at the moment I can really understand how hurt you were If she spoke to you in a harsh and unsympathetic way as I have had this with my daughter a lot and this is the conclusion I came too. With her own problems adding mine to them meant she hit her limit of sympathy if you know what I mean.

    I hope your pain and exhaustion improves and that you have a good meeting g with your rheumy today.

    Hugs ☺️

    Sharon 🌸

  • Sharon your not preaching darling as you care,it will get sorted with my daughter.I was just having a crap day and i knew i would feel different the next day. I will tell her she can help me more by ringing up a bit more and when she is here to give me a big hug especially when i am crying and i don't need her to say anything just to hold me. Thank you darling.xxxxx

  • Awe sylvi that's brought a tear to my eye. A big hug at the right time will work wonders for you and your daughter xxx

  • Oh dear I can imagine how you felt after the upset with your daughter. Think positive -reach for the stars ! If we cant be honest with our families about how we feel who then! It is a difficult one - as I know if I am honest with my family it stresses them out and they worry about me ! Hope all goes well with the next few days appointments and you feel a bit brighter.

  • I am sure we will be ok and her dad is taking her shopping tonight and i have asked him to speak to about hurt i was yesterday. I can't win with my family if i do things then i suffer and get told to stop wallowing in self pity if i don't do anything and i feel sorry for myself i still get the same reaction. Thank you all for your kind words.xxxxxx

  • Sorry to hear you are having a tough time all round. Hope you get the improvement you need from your op and the pain clinic and the relationship with your daughter xXx

  • Oh I'm sorry, Sylvi. You're not having much luck at the moment, are you? How did the rheum appt go? X

  • He took me off naproxen as it gives you ulcers and thins the blood and as i am having a op in August i would have to be off it by then anyway. Also he is reffering me to a ortho pod for my toes to get them straightened. The two i damaged last week are the worst so we will see.xxxxx

  • Hmm...not an easy week🤔Girls eh? They do tend to take things out on their mum: try not to take it too personally; pick your battles. I understand that the gardening caused you further pain but at least you enjoyed it at the time☺Concentrate on a quick recovery for your op and try to spend some 'me time': read a good book, enjoy a favourite movie or listen to a great CD. There are other days to spend worrying about the rest of your family x

  • I do adult colouring books for me time as i am addicted to it and it does relax me,reading is difficult it has been since fibro first reared its ugly head. Thank you sweet hear.xxxxxx

  • Sorry you've been having a bumpy and painful time recently Sylvi. Hoping you feel calmer soon and can focus on being strong for your op. Look forward to hearing how much better you feel in a few weeks. So many on th forum wish you well, keep battling (but not with your daughter) x

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