Send me a few nice thoughts.

[fartikins]

I have my visit. to the nephrologist on Monday at 1.30pm. He will have the results from my biopsy and will no doubt point the way forward. Have a look at my recent blood test (UK) readings and see if there is any hope for me:

K (potassium) 4.9

Urea 13.6

Cr 251

egfr 16

Bi carb 17.3

Calcium 2.36

Phos 1.09

Hb 122

WCC 7.2

TSATS 18%

I am not eating or sleeping and the anxiety is unbearable. My poor husband thinks that I am just going to be plugged into a machine and I will be all singing and dancing afterwards - nothing will change and that is what is bothering me - I don't think he realises just what maybe is to come and with our lives will change for ever. I don't think he will be able to cope. He will still expect the housework cooking and washing done as it was before and I will be the same person. I have tried talking to him but he kept saying that I have got it all out of proportion. I just feel so lonely as well he is always out with his family and this happens every day. I don't really have anyone at my end - just my son.

Will I have to go with the nephrologists recommendations or can I ask for a chance of trying to change numbers by diet. I know they will go down eventually - do I prepare now or wait - I just need some time when all out fear has not taken over my life. I have had so much bad luck in my life that started at the age of 5 and it hasn't stopped.

Think of me and send some nice thoughts my way - thanks for reading.

[Sophiebun11]

Why not bring your husband to the appt. with you to find out. You don't have to start dialysis right away when your eGFR reaches a magic number. It's all in how you feel.

You need to get your anxiety under control. Easier said than done, I know. Maybe some talk therapy and medication will be the way.

Good luck at your appt. Let us know how it goes.

[itzmich]

It's a lot to deal with my heart goes out to you. What has helped me is seeing a therapist as well as doing what I can with diet and moderate exercize. One day at a time. Have your husband go to the nephrologist with you maybe it will help him understand. Talk to your doctor as well about your fears. Keeping you in my prayers.

[Confuseddiabetic]

I got very scared when my GFR went down, but my doctor did a 24 hour urine test which showed that my kidneys functioning at 71%. I do see a therapist because there’s lots of stuff in my life that cause anxiety. I agree with what other people have noted here. You’re not alone. Sending a virtual hug!

[fartikins in reply to Confuseddiabetic]

thank you all for your wonderful replies.

[Hello67]

You are in our thoughts and prayers. The Father is walking with you in your journey and He wants to take the weight off of you. We weren’t created to walk through this life alone. I agree with the other suggestions to bring your husband or even your son with you. Two sets of ears are always better than one set and when we’re so anxious we might not be able to remember everything the Dr said. Have you seen a renal dietician, if not you could ask the neph to refer you.I know it’s hard to think of our blessings when we’re faced with such hard struggles but I see that your son is supportive, I’m sure that’s a blessing. I picked up on that because we lost our son in 2021. So when I say that the lord is with you I am speaking from experience. I have trouble seeing the blessings right now too but am trying to be thankful for the good in my life.

Our hearts go out to you, you are not alone. Please let us know how your appt goes.

I believe that your husband is in the denial phase and is afraid for you. It probably seems like he doesn’t care but he’s probably struggling with fear of the changes in your lives. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[fartikins in reply to Hello67]

Thank you so much for your kind words

[WYOAnne NKF Ambassador]

I am going to come right to the point - get a grip. I know it is a lot to take in but take one day at a time.Don't know if it is comforting or not to you, but everyone on this site has gone through exactly the same thing that you are. The best thing for you to do is to learn all you can about kidneys and CKD. Good place to start is right on the NKF website kidney.org

You can also sign up on line for "kidney school" at davita.com

Knowledge is power and makes this all not so scary!

Many on this site have been able to stabilize their CKD by changing their diet . There are diet suggestions on the NKF website also. See if you get a referral for a renal dietician.

There is a free app "My Food Coach" at kidney.org/myfoodcoach

Sorry but a diagnose of CKD does not mean you won't be able to clean, wash clothes or cook.

CKD is a slow process and hopefully you will be able to stabilize your creatinine and eGFR.

I had strep throat at age 9 and it damaged my kidneys. 30years later I was diagnosed with FSGS (scarring in kidneys). I received a kidney 10 years later from a deceased donor. I am now 22+ years post transplant. I live well - I travel, hike in the mountains here in WY, visit friends and family in VA , WI and MO. My life was not over when I needed a transplant - my miracle was the start of a new wonderful life

[fartikins in reply to WYOAnne]

Hello - thanks for grounding me. I really have bad health anxiety and since I was started on insulin 6 weeks ago its gone downhill. I must take charge of my situation and let him know what I want and then listen to what he says. Thanks again

[WYOAnne NKF Ambassador]

Yes, if I have learned anything from my over 30 years of kidney health - is you have to be your own advocate. You have to stand up for yourself. You know your body better than anyone.Write questions out now, for your nephrologist tomorrow. I still do that before my appointments. I see my nephrologist now every 3 months.

Let me know how your appointment goes tomorrow. To me, the worst part is the not knowing. Once you have the answer you know where you are at and go on from there.

[Sarah_402]

I know the feeling of health anxiety and feeling sick, hopeless, lonely and paralyzed by fear. I have other health conditions that can also cause life threatening problems. So I get it. Good luck with your appointment tomorrow. Let us know how your doing. Keep going fartikins.

[fartikins in reply to Sarah_402]

Thank you for your kind thoughts

[GoodHealthIsAJourney]

Thinking about you and hoping everything went well today!

[fartikins in reply to GoodHealthIsAJourney]

Thanks

[Grammy80]

Sending good thoughts and hugs! It may really help having your husband educated and also maybe some individual counseling. You aren't alone but sometimes having that 'third' party to talk to really helps. They are a great sounding board. Many need a hand over these humps whether it is CKD, cancer or other medical issues.💕

[fartikins in reply to Grammy80]

Thanks for your kind reply