Worth trying?: I'm slowly starting to think... - Weight Loss NHS

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Worth trying?

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI

I'm slowly starting to think I will never reach my goal to get to 16% body fat and have a nice flat stomach. I was bullied by kids and my sports teacher for my belly and ever since I cannot stop thinking about it and feel insecure. Every time I am wearing bikini it's the first priority to hide my belly, I just hate it :(.

Every morning I wake up looking at my belly and regret eating so much the day before.

The worst part is no matter what I do it doesn't work. My belly sure looks better now, when I shed 15kg but I don't think it will ever be flat like on real slim people. I know this is a first world problem, non-important in the big picture etc. but I started noticing how much it affects my life and mental wellbeing lately.

I try to eat less, workout and be positive about my body but nothing helps. I cannot eat 1200kcal a day, that's just impossible. Even if I manage to not eat any snacks at work, as soon as I go back home and have dinner I crave sweets. Then I start eating fruit and honey and sometimes even sweets. That's how I ruin my progress every single day :( I know it, I see it but I cannot stop it. I feel really helpless right now and think maybe it's time to give up for good :(

28 Replies
oldestnewest

No don't give up.to lose more belly fat only walking or running helps.swimming might not sure.and or weight lifting is supposed to be excellent.weight lifting is supposed to be the best.5 minutes warm up on a any cardio machine.may sound boring bit they have specific machine in there so that you don't even need to get on the floor to do it.weight lifting has been shown to be better for health than cardio

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to Lovewatchingtv

I do strength training with a trainer 3 times a week and have volleyball sessions 2 times a week each 3hrs :( I eta clean too, it's just the amount. I literally have no control over myself and eating soothes me. After dinner I cannot stop eating until I go to bed :( I tried to stop but it keeps happening... Don't know what to do

Eleanorba
EleanorbaMaintainer
in reply to YesICan13

Are you eating plenty during the day? I recommend a week or two just maintaining your weight and experimenting with how much you need to eat in the day so you don’t binge in the evening. I was always being told to find an alternative comfort to eating at night but it only started working when I reconciled myself to losing weight really slowly and eating more during the day. Now I really am happy painting my nails or having a hot bath!

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to Eleanorba

I started paying more attention to how hungry I actually am and it seems to be working. Haven't had a forbidden snack in a week :) Thanks for the advice!

candoo
candoo6lbs

hi, being bullied must of been awful. I wasn't bullied but over the years some comments have stuck with me. I will not let anyone see me naked and I only manage holidays on the beach because ive slimmed down before going and wear a sarong. youre not on youre own with your feelings although that might not help. doesn't matter people say nice things. I lost over 3 stone and felt great in clothes but still not naked. ive put just over a stone back on and need some support so joined this forum this week. my main problem was id start every day and do good but every evening think oh ill just eat.... bad stuff.... cos ill start tomorrow. you sound a lovely person and a bet your seeing things worse than they are. ive got my lumps and bumps which will never go no matter what so ive learned to get to a size im happy with and not keep thinking, just another half stone, just another few pounds. ive fell off the wagon but that's why im here. don't give up, keep going and do it cos it makes you feel good. don't do it cos of bullies or other people but do this cos it makes you happier and confident. in an evening I have in grapes and bananas so if need a fix at least im grabbing something healthy, then congratulate myself in the morning. my plan is to cut down in the evening altogether but at the min my body n brain are trained to think oooooh snack time,lol. you can do it.

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to candoo

Hi, thanks for your support! 🤗 Well done on your achievement, even if you've gone up a bit it's nothing permanent! I gain and lose a few kgs occasionally too.

I'm so glad that you understand my struggle! Nighttime is awful, we're supposed to feel good and safe at home, yet that's the place where we start overeating. It would be lovely to keep up and see if we can make it together. Let's start with this evening. I'm really not eating anything after dinner, promise! If you can make it I can make it too and vice versa, right?

candoo
candoo6lbs
in reply to YesICan13

well it was a fight not reaching for the biscuits last night,lol. im starting my weigh ins on a sunday so would of been so easy to think ill start Monday,however I had a hand full of grapes and a cuppa and thought to myself how bad you gonna feel in the morning? so tonight is my tea, then a low fat yogurt and later if needed I have a few grapes left. so first thought in morning is … well done and not oh no start again,lol. yes we can do it. ill promise to do 20 sit ups and some leg lifts before bed.

BridgeGirl
BridgeGirlAdministrator
in reply to candoo

Make it a full fat Greek yoghurt, that's the way to go :) Much more filling, it's not heavily processed, like the low fat ones, and you're less like to be looking for something else to nibble :)

Have you found the Daily Diary yet? Here's the link for today's: tomorrow's should be posted shortly healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

The Sunday weigh-in team is very supportive. Get there early, if you can, and join in the chat. Take time to respond to others and give them some encouragement and you'll soon feel part of the team :)

candoo
candoo6lbs
in reply to BridgeGirl

thank you, ive looked through some of the items on the site and ive printed off the 12 week plan and put on my fridge. this is the first time ive done a forum,im not even on any social sites so this is all new to me. when I did the nhs before I went to the meetings once a week and everyone was brilliant. I learnt to change habits and all the staff were really supportive. I like having weigh in sessions so im so glad I found this forum. thanks for your advice and ill get some of the greek yogurt . :-)

BridgeGirl
BridgeGirlAdministrator
in reply to candoo

Keep exploring and join in as much as you can, for maximum benefit. As a reminder of all the activities, here's the What's Happening? post. It's a great place for a general chat, too healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to candoo

Hey there, just wanted to check how it's going with the evening snacking :D

I'm actually proud to say that I skipped it completely last week and it shows! :) We even had friends over and ordered pizza but I only ate 2 thin slices and a salad. I'm getting back to the gym this week in preparation for my next (beach) holiday :)

How are things with you? :) Hope you're doing well too!

candoo
candoo6lbs
in reply to YesICan13

hi just a quick one as just about to go to work n not home till late. going well thanks, lost 4 lb first week then stayed the same but that was no surprise. ate few more cals than should of but also had muesli instead of my porridge and them cals doubled. however im happy that im back with motivation and yes stopped my snacking in the evenings, yaaaay. lol. well done on you stopping in the evenings and yeah you should be proud cos its not that easy. also having 2 slices of pizza I really good cos its a treat but you controlled it. good luck with the gym. im going swimming tomorrow with my son so that's good for the both of us. :-) nice to hear your doing so well, have a great week but ill talk soon. best get off cos knowing me ill not realise the time. speak soon :-)

candoo
candoo6lbs
in reply to YesICan13

hi yesican, was just checking in on how youre doing. just sat and ate some grapes so think ill go make myself a hot drink now. went swimming with my son, we had great time chasing one another around pool, all the time im thinking, this is great for my thighs,lol. :-) hope the gym going well for you. hope youre still doing good with the snacking, its amazing how stopping that makes you feel so much better. hope youre having a great week :-)

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to candoo

Hey there, so great to hear that! Very well done and you also had fun with your son, that's priceless! Imagine before, we would just sit on the couch feeling sorry for ourselves and snacking some more...

I'm also doing very well, lost the excess weight I gained on my holiday and I keep on losing weight. :)) I also feel much better and think I finally found the right amount of food for me.

Keep the good work up! Chat to you soon :)

1200 cals is very low, unless you are very short in height.

Have you checked the NHS BMI calculator to see how many cals they recommend you eat? If you don't eat enough during the day then you are much more likely to "snap" and over-indulge in the evening. Make sure you get enough protein and natural fat - I find a nice protein-rich dinner and maybe some berries with a tablespoon of cream hits the spot and makes me feel full enough.

I also use the Daily Diary on the weight loss forum, maybe give it a try for a few days and see if it helps?

About the flat stomach - there are exercise programmes on Youtube (which I have watched but never tried!) - the name Jillian Michaels comes to mind - but I am not sure whether a completely flat stomach is achievable for everyone. For example, I am a healthy BMI, post-menopause, mother-of-two, I ain't never gonna have a flat stomach again. I never wore a bikini throughout my adult life, because I am not about to highlight one of my worst physical features when I have plenty nice ones to show off. However I managed to find one recently with nice high-waisted shorts and a crop top, it looks quite sporty and you literally can't tell I have a bit of a tum. And having lost weight, my body probably looks the best it has in 25 years. Maybe you can do something similar?

On the other hand, you could do an experiment - try the belly-busting exercise and see if it helps. You could take a photo in the mirror every day and see if there's a difference?

Do please also remember you are not defined by your weight or any belly you might have. Give yourself permission to look down on anyone who bullied you over this.

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to bikegrrrl

Hi there, thanks for replying :) I'm quite short - only 159cm, so my basal metabolic rate (needed to maintain my weight) is somewhere below 1400kcal. I don't even feel so hungry on 1200kcal and don't lose weight too rapidly, so I think that should be right. Just need to get rid of the bad habit of constantly eating :D. I am really determined to explore how flat my stomach can get, so will definitely check this channel and the belly-busting exercise, thanks!

Congratulations on losing weight, I'm sure you'll look great in this swimsuit! I love retro high waist clothes, so might look into something similar too :)

IndigoBlue61
IndigoBlue61Administrator
in reply to YesICan13

Good morning

Can I ask how you got to that figure? That seems a little low, the current NHs guidelines suggest a minimum of 1400 per day for weight loss, and around 1800 to maintain.

Given your history of losing control it may be better to eat a little more, and eat properly, and accept a slower weight loss. Yo-yo dieting is not very good for anyone I’m afraid ☹️

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to IndigoBlue61

Hey, I used this tool scoobysworkshop.com/calorie... but any BMR calculator says pretty much the same - ~1400kcal BMR. I'm 158cm and 54kg. :)

You're right, I've had enough of the yo-yo, it's been going on for 6 months now.

And after my US holiday, I gained 1,5kg and it really shows in my thighs, belly and arms. However, I decided not to go crazy and just accept it and try to never let this happen again.

My goal now is to be mindful and learn to understand my body. My problem is I don't even feel hungry, I don't know when I'm really hungry. So for now I'll go with 1200kcal a day and if I feel hungry for more than 30mins I will have a lil snack.

ohsofierce
ohsofierce15kg
in reply to bikegrrrl

That swimsuit sounds right up my alley. Any chance you've got a link or would that be considered advertising? Either way glad to hear you found a nice one!!!!!

bikegrrrl
bikegrrrl10 kg
in reply to ohsofierce

I don’t mind sharing!

I got the top and bottom separately.

Lands End swim shorts, bikini crop top from “Pour Moi” although I see Bravissimo are doing a very nice one now which I would have bought had it been available at the time (although it is textured so not an exact match). I remember Pour Moi also had nicer crop tops but not in my size so is worth a look.

landsend.co.uk/Womens_Tummy...

bravissimo.com/products/san...

pourmoi.co.uk/products/spac...

Happy hunting!

ohsofierce
ohsofierce15kg
in reply to bikegrrrl

Thank you!!

Eleanorba
EleanorbaMaintainer

I've got a different body shape to you - narrow waist but wide hips, I put all my weight on on my thighs. I have to accept that I'm never going to have tiny hips - if I dieted down to that, my face and shoulders would look like a corpse! I think it will be worth thinking about how to focus less on a flat stomach and more on your good bits! BUT I would really recommend Pilates as a way of toning your tummy. Lots of places have classes. Stick with it as the beginner sessions are a bit boring! But I've now been doing it for 10 years - it cured my bad back took two inches off my waist without dieting.

Did anyone read this article? It is pretty impressive, I was considering this option myself but too scared to make the next step. express.co.uk/life-style/di...

candoo
candoo6lbs

morning, how you getting on in the evenings? ive been doing ok but then cos of work I had my tea quite late so didn't want to raid the fridge. :-)

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to candoo

Hi again, sorry for not posting for so long! I was in the US on holiday. It was amazing but of course, I ate a lot of unhealthy food and gained some weight. I'm not going to freak out this time and start hating myself, I will just continue with my healthy diet and have patience. I'm going on holiday in a month, hopefully, i will lose the weight I gained until then :) Planning on not snacking after dinner EVER again :D let's see if it works. I will also go jogging tonight, it usually lowers my appetite. How are you doing?

candoo
candoo6lbs

hi nice to hear from you, yeah im doing good thanks. I realised I was eating in the evenings cos I kept giving myself the excuse I can start tomorrow. well I was fed up of the next mornings and coming on here seems to of given me the kick start I needed. first I ate grapes n bananas, then just had my pudding a bit later ,like yogurt and fruit. so fingers crossed. I have sunday evenings off, don't go mad but just give myself permission to eat them naughties and not feel bad, it keeps me going for the week. wow US, hope you had a great holiday. yeah don't freak out it was a holiday and like you say just think of eating healthy. good for you going jogging that's fantastic, its not something I can do, I have asthma but even then I don't think id do it anyway,lol. love walking so just started moving more this week. been swimming today and walking around a farm with my son. Just think a month will soon come and go and youl be on your holidays, just think how quickly the month will fly so how good you can be for that month. enjoy your jogging and hope you have a good week :-)

YesICan13
YesICan13Healthy BMI
in reply to candoo

Well done on not eating anymore in the evening, it's the most difficult part of the day for me too! And having a little Sunday treat is a great idea, I also do it often especially after my volleyball training.

The US was amazing, so I try to not have any regrets, just want to stop the yo-yo effect and continue eating healthy and in reasonable amounts. I didn't go jogging after all but I managed not to eat any snacks in the evening, so I ended up eating only 1050 kcal for the day :)

Thanks so much for the support, I see where you got your badge from! You're great, keep going strong! :)

candoo
candoo6lbs

aww thank you. well done on not eating them snacks, I would say you would of had some calories left if you wanted a healthy snack but then I know what its sometimes like if you go and get one thing it can set you off. ive just had my yogurt and meringue so that's me done for tonight. have a good evening and a good week ahead :-)

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