belly fat and sadness

hi guys, I used to be a curvy slim size 12 till I had my coil changed to a hormone coil this made me gain about 15kg. I'm constantly tired, my appetite isn't consistent. My confidence levels are really low at the moment and I just need to change my entire lifestyle but it doesn't make it easy when your partner loves your back fat and brings you home bad food all the time.

Would love some feedback or encouragement. im 23 and a size 16/18 I weigh 105kg

12 Replies
oldestnewest

Hi and welcome

Take a look at the Pinned posts section to the right of your screen (bottom if you're using a mobile), or in the drop down on the 'Posts' page (it says 'arrange by'). Read the Welcome Newbie thread, then move through to the challenges, where we hope you'll find at least one that will appeal to you.

Move down to the Topics, to find a variety of threads, collated into specific topics for ease of access and we ask that you also 'file' your own threads, so that others won't miss your important news.

Have a look at the NHS 12 week plan, as many people have had success with it. Also use the BMI (can be found in the pinned Newbie post) to find your target calories, it's important to eat enough. This was a major turning point for me, realising I could eat anything I wanted as long as the calories are accounted for 😊

Don't forget to take your starting measurements and a 'before' picture, as they can be very motivating on days that the scales refuse to co-operate 😊

To the right of the HOME page (bottom on a mobile), you'll find Events. In there, you'll find links to our daily Weigh-in's (you will choose just one day per week), our Daily Diary, where we post our menu and exercise plans, for accountability, advice and support - which is great to get ideas of what other people are eating and I have to confess to nicking some of their menu's and our “What's happening today” thread, where we pop in for a chat.

Be aware, that the HU app doesn't give you access to all of our important features, so we advise that you use the full website page

We've found that to get the best out of this community, we need to be active on the forum, as it's where we exchange information, get motivation and inspiration and make friends. We hope that you'll join us here, regularly, too 😊

Wishing you all the best on your weight loss journey

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Hello and welcome Ruhomon94 😊

You have come to the right place for support and encouragement

Please read all the information Cracker has provided and please ask if you have any questions

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I wish they'd stop experimenting with you ladies' hormones too Ruhomon94, and then telling us it's all down to personal responsibility, just calories in versus calories out. Aargh! That's better :-)

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before I had this coil I had the copper IUD which was hormone free. I had energy and was shredding weight at the gym. I lost 14kf in 2.5 months with great eating and gym sessions 5 times a week but if I do that now It doesn't work for me.

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You can only do what you can do. Take control of the hormones you can; try eating twice as much energy from natural fat compared to low Gi carbs. That will help keep your insulin controlled which will have a positive effect on other hormones, reduce any tiredness and appetite inconsistencies.

Good luck, and keep us posted with your progress please.

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It sounds like you have 2 issues - your reaction to the hormonal coil and a partner who's a feeder. The self-confidence part can be addressed by starting to take back control of these two main issues.

When I first had my coil fitted I went back a few times to get it checked and to get my questions answered, to deal with some initial discomfort, bloating etc. I suggest you do the same and maybe change it back to the non hormonal one if that worked better for you.

A few people on here have had to address feeder partners and there are a few strategies to help you with this. It's always important to talk things through properly with your partner. He feels you're attractive as you are - take this as the compliment that it's meant to be. But explain that you need to lose some weight for your health, and that the curvy body that he loves will still be there (my boyfriend was also worried I'd lose my curves - but I certainly didn't!)

Then if he wants to bring you home treats, request things that will help you on your journey. Fresh strawberries with a dollop of nice greek yogurt, very nice dark chocolate which is easier to savour one square at a time, favourite magazines, flowers, ask him to cook you meals as per Hairy Dieters recipes - still delicious, but healthy. Even ask for jewellery - if he really wants to treat you - see how far this will go :) You can do this :)

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Thank you so much Ruth! I have an appointment booked next week to get it replaced with the normal coil, hopefully this will help kick start my new lifestyle.

The thing is I should be able to tell him no and only eat what's best for me, so fat this morning I have eaten proper breakfast and fruit so I feel great. I know he defo doesn't want me to lose the curves and that's probably why he isn't helping me.

I think its time for me to show him I can keep the curves but feel and look a lot more healthy

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You can definitely keep the curves - I am a healthy weight now but still have 13 inches difference between my waist and hips. If you exercise and manage your food in conjunction, and aim to lose weight sustainably (i.e. no crash dieting) then you will keep your curves. He must have loved you for the way you were before in your size 12s...? So just explain that's what you're aiming for, not something skinny and unrealistic :)

Good luck for your coil appointment. I have to get mine changed soon too - as it's approaching the 5 year checkup - not really looking forward to it! But once these things settle down they're amazing :)

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Good advice Ruth 😊

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First thing is have a serious chat with your partner and tell him this this extra weight is no good for your health or your self-esteem. As a loving partner he should help you lose weight and support you so please only bring you home healthy food and cheer you on with your efforts. nothing is more difficult than trying to lose weight with a partner who is undermining your intentions.

Best of luck and stick to your new regime

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Thank you!

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If you are lucky to always have a very cheerful, buoyant personality, maybe he can't see that any "improvement" is necessary. But in my case, when I gained 2st in weight I lost much of my sense of fun and libido. But I regained both after I shed the weight 😊 . Now if that's not an incentive for a man's support, I don't know what is !! 😉

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