New and scared I'll fail on day 1

Hi all

I just signed up to do the 12 week programme with NHS. I have such a lot to lose, 7 stone 4 pounds would put me in the middle of my healthy bmi bracket. I've done everything in the past. Every diet going. My Fitness Pal was the most successful. I got back into my bmi recommended range. But as soon as I was comfortable with my weight loss I stopped using it. Tried to go back to it a few times but never kept it going. I'm really hopeful that here I'll find support and see success.

At the moment, I'm totally out of control. Well, up until today. I had a measured bowl of porridge. Calories counted! Coffee and tea calories counted! But I have virtually zero self control. This is why I'm terrified I'll fail again. My partner is sick of hearing me talk about what I'm going to do and then not doing it. He's so supportive. He loves me as I am and never criticizes but he's always careful with his weight and I can tell I shock him sometimes with how much I eat. I'm a secret eater and it's getting worse. I love toast and butter. And crisps. My downfall. And yet my kids are so fit and health conscious. I feel like I'm letting everyone down but most of all I'm letting myself down. I say horrible things to myself about my appearance. I have a horrible saggy stomach. Would you be shocked if I said I was a square shape? Or man mountain? That's my more polite way of talking about me! I say absolutely hateful things.

I have horrible pain which I think is my gall bladder but I'm too scared to go to the Dr. Anyway, rant over. But I think if I didn't throw it all out there I'd probably never say it and never seek help. So today is a new day....

"Look forward, walk more, do yoga, stick to calorie allowance, positivity, get my hair done, smile more, dress nicely, put on some make up, start to look after myself, Love myself!"

Nice to meet you all. 😊


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17 Replies

  • Hi, welcome and thank you for sharing so much! I totally get how you feel, I thought when I started properly in October (with 25 years of only ever losing a stone before) I assumed I would fail. I tried a paleo diet for a week and something just clicked. I got my brain into gear and stick to it. You need to find a 'diet' you can stick to, that is sustainable and forever. Seems like previously you have been like me 'being good for a bit then back to normal'. You have to make your normal good. It is doable and the results will be worth it. I didn't tell anyone apart from husband until I was well into it but then I told everyone as this made me more accountable. Now I have lost 6 stone. I put weight on every time I have a holiday as I eat a load of junk but I get back on it and the weight comes off again. I still have a long way to go as I am 17 stone now so let's do it together! Good luck. Stick to it and reward yourself every half stone! By Christmas you will feel fabulous!

  • Hi Ella

    Thanks for replying. It really means so much. I'm going to look into Paleo seriously. Done similar things in the past which worked well.

    Hope you don't mind that I followed you.

    Chat soon.

    Jo x

  • I like followers, shows me we have stuff in common! Let me know how you get on 🤞

  • OMG it's like reading about myself so glad I'm not the only one. My hubby is very fit and looks after himself whereas I'd rather just stuff my face as I feel like everything I do I fail so what's the point the point is that I want to be fit and healthy to but everytime I start im great for about two days and then I crave so bad that I binge like I've never binged before then the guilt comes in and I feel even more rubbish about myself and eat more. This has been my life for as long as I can remember and I want to change it so much but then I read about all different types of diet joined so many slimming clubs start great then same thing I feel a totally failure. I joined this forum the other day and reading people's journey gave me a bit of hope to no im not the only one and to take each day as it comes if I have a bad day then Im going to try to have a good day the next but if I don't there's always tomorrow etc life's to short to beat myself up which I've learnt now. So fingers crossed with my new attitude and the support on here I will get there and I'm sure you will to. I did my day one it went great day two not so great now on day three fingers crossed going to be a better day. Take care keep me posted with your progress. I'm sure your do great. Have a lovely day. 😁

  • Hi Gems

    Thanks for replying. It's so good to know I'm not alone. Already feeling less alone.

    Hope you don't mind that I followed you. It would be great to share progress and support.

    Jo x

  • Hi Jo so grateful for your support. We can do this hopefully it will be a lot easier this time and we can share our experiences and journeys together via here. Hope you have a great day and will keep you posted . Take care. Xxx

  • I am EXACTLY the same .. I have no self control either .. but I am making a proper go of it and I am hoping the support of these awesome people will help .. I have at least 4 stone to lose (ideally I would like to shed 5 and a half) - but I am taking it one day at a time and setting my self half stone goals .. so I have something small to work for.

    I have always fallen off the wagon once I stop what ever I was doing previously .. this time I am trying to get into my very full busy brain it is a lifestyle / regime change - not a diet, not a fad ..

    I am also blogging what I am doing and tracking my food via my fit bit - everything so no cheeting .. and if I do have a bad day - thats just one day - no giving up ..

    I know I can still have a bag of crisps occassionally - but gone are the days of snacking at my desk on 2 or 3 a day. I will learn self control

    I have stuck a reminder poster by my desk and on the fridge so its in my face - of daily calories 1400 - remember your 5 a day

    and how much exercise i need to do a week .. and in bold letters it says you WILL BE AWESOME ..

    This time I believe I can do it (not sure why I expected to fail before) - WE CAN DO THIS ...

    One day at a time ..


  • Hi socialshazza. I find your story very encouraging. Well done on what you've done already. I like your idea of setting half stone goals. I think I will do the same. I have 6 stone to lose to get me to a healthy weight. Hope you don't mind me following you but it's so great to hear a real person who has felt like I have and done the same as I have and yet is kicking the *ss of those excess pounds.

  • aww thanks .. I am on day 2 and feeling great so far ..

    I am trying to cut down on portions and fill up on veggies :)

    and making an effort to drink more water :)

  • and if you want a support buddy .. I am happy to that person :)

  • Hello Jojo1410 and welcome to the Weight Loss Forum

    Thank you for sharing so much, and I know we have all felt similar thought s at one time or another 😊 You have taken the first step, and as a successful weight loser in the last, you know you can do it. This time, we are all here to cheer you on and help you maintain when you get to goal 😊

    Here are a few suggestions on how to get the most out of the forum. Please note if you are using the new HU App many of these features are not available so I suggest you use the full website version.

    The first place to look is at the Pinned posts section to the right of your screen (bottom if you're using a mobile), read the Welcome Newbie thread first and move through to the challenges, where we hope you'll find at least one that will appeal to you. Move down to the Topics, to find a variety of threads, collated into specific topics for ease of access and we ask that you also 'file' your own threads, so that others won't miss your important news

    Have a look at the NHS 12 week plan, as many people have had success with it. Also use the BMI checker to find your target calories, it's important to eat enough. This was a major turning point for me, realising I could eat anything I wanted as long as the calories are accounted for. Don't forget to take your starting measurements and a 'before' picture, as they can be very motivating on days that the scales refuse to co-operate

    The forum also have group weigh-ins every day, as well as a new Daily Diary, if you wish to take part. The posts can always be found in the Events section on the 'home' page. And if you just want to chat, to say hello or share any news or struggles then look out for What's Happening Today thread.

    You'll notice a grey box next to people's names, these are achievement badges, and as a new member you have a 'Newbie' badge. We've found that to get the best out of this community, we need to be active on the forum, as it's where we exchange information, get motivation and inspiration and make friends. We hope that you'll join us here, regularly, too. If you have any questions please just ask

    Best wishes


  • Another kindered spirit - you could be describing me too. I've counted points (WW), syns (SW) and been sucessful but never kept it off. I've actually never counted calories, and although it's a bit daunting I'm going to give it a go. Good luck to all of us!

  • Hi Jojo, welcome to the group. I love your honesty about how you are feeling and I think that because you have been so honest in your post that you have a really good chance of succeeding. You will get there, we are all in the same boat in this group and we all support each other when we have blips and praise and congratulate each other when we do well. There is always some one to talk to and it makes the journey so much easier.

    For me this time losing weight is very different, I am not on a short term fix I am following a healthy eating life style. I post my weight, which is usually a huge secret and I also have a profile photo up. I have lots of little tricks to keep me focussed, like measuring myself every few months, taking a photo of myself in my underwear for me to refer back to, and a food diary, in which I record all food, drink, exercise and how I feel. You have made the first step on your journey so good luck and keep posting.

  • Sounds like you have a plan. Now stick to it and treat yourself with love. You deserve it.

  • Just take it one day at a time. Remind yourself why you are doing this and remember each day is a new day of a new you. The support on this site is amazing.

  • We've been there too so don't worry.... you've been successful before so you know what to do. The group will be here to iffer you support and encouragement along the way

    Don't forget that you have a lot of experience to share too. Looking forward to seeing your posts💗💖

  • Thanks for your post Jojo1410 it's very honest and like the others I can totally relate to what you said. portion size is my problem I often eat the same as my husband he's 6ft 3 and im 5ft 4 lol. My will power is getting better but I do slip sometimes.

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