Ever since my nanna passed away (17 years this year) i've struggled with eating...it's not that i eat too much in fact i barely eat but when i do it's always high fat and sugary foods and drinks.
I know i need to lose weight (currently 16-17 stone) and have done for a long while but when it comes to motivation i struggle.
I have my £15 a year active pass ready for my local leisure center, picked out the classes i want to do around working and it's currently in a folder where it has been for at least the last 4 months. i have a healthy weekly meal plan that took me ages to finish, i have most of the food in for the meal plan and have done since around April (obviously the frozen & cupboard stuff) and not touched it.
I have started eating less crisps, chocolate, cakes etc and limit it to 1 small bar & 1 packet of crisps which i have with my sandwich for work 4 times a week.
I've started drinking more water, although i do still drink fizzy stuff but not as much.
I have a more energetic job and do between 20,000-25,000 steps on my fitbit 4 times a week.
My portion sizes aren't as big anymore and i try to get my 5 a day as much as possible but i'm not a big lover of fruit and trying to fit it in when i'm out most days is really difficult.
I also suffer from Depression, Anxiety and Stress (currently seeing a psychologist), Fatty Liver Disease, Polycystic Ovaries, Hyperthyroidism, Hashimoto's disease and several vitamin deficiencies which i'm currently taking supplements for.
A couple of days ago i ordered some new clothes in sizes 22 and 24. i didn't really think about it at the time, i just saw things i liked and put it in my basket and ordered them. i've just tried them all on now and there all going back as i look hideous in them and can't stop crying. I want to lose the weight but have so many factors against me and i don't know what to do. it's never affected me like this before.
I only used to have a bathroom mirror and whenever i looked down i knew i wasn't thin but i didn't think i was as big as i was till i walked past a shop window and saw my reflection. i had to do a double take to make sure it was me. my heart sunk but not enough to push myself to really start doing something about it.