When I go off track it's normally the result of an emotional trigger. If I feel like I can't keep going with my day, or I feel like I can just about keep going but when I get home I'm going to need some serious 'me' time, then I start thinking about food, wine, watching iplayer or a dvd, you know the drill, so far pretty similar to a lot of people I guess.
So, what actually happens for me? I've mentioned on other posts that I've finally got a proper job (yay), after several months of jobhunting, interviews, various let-downs, lots of stress and various unproductive time-consuming processes. So, last week I went to an interview, by the end of the week I had a job offer (woop), this week I met the agency to sort out the contract, then on Monday I'll have my first day. There have been a few emotional triggers relating to this, such as to do with the job contract, my new working schedule, and worrying about how I'll fit in at the new smart office. Pretty universal worries I imagine...
I'm particularly worried about a clash between my new work schedule and a doctor's appointment (gynae) I've had booked for a while but don't think I need anymore, but I want to speak to my GP before cancelling it. So yesterday I contacted my GP surgery but they can't book me an appointment to see my GP around my new shifts until after the date of the gynae appointment (3 weeks away). The fact I couldn't resolve this stressed me out and led to a fairly typical 'off track' moment for me:
There was an event for my housing co-op that I was meant to be going to last night but didn't feel like going to. I asked my friend if she was going and as she was I decided to go too, seemed a good idea to get out and have a good time rather than stay in on my own. Guess what at the event there was loads of free wine, nice food etc. I had a good time, but definitely drank too much (I'm a lightweight these days, and it's also not good for my stomach). I also ate too much, a usual side effect of drinking too much... This morning I paid the price with a hangover (now gone, thankfully) and no run. This is how I go 'off-track' - I ate and drank too much last night, only slightly too much in most people's books I'm sure, but then today I'm paying the price, and I won't achieve my exercise goals for the week.
I realise this sounds pretty minor in terms of how 'off track' a person might go, but I really feel like there's a slippery slope back to weight gain and unhealthy eating, drinking etc, and I'm in danger of starting that descent at any moment. Is this a normal level of fear for someone who's maintaining? Rationally, I feel like it surely can't be that likely that after all this hard work something will just switch and I'll go back to how I was before. But I think now I'll be getting out in the 'real world' a lot more, as a result of this new job, I'll be exposed to more triggers, more pressure, and more potential challenges to my new healthy routines, so maybe there's a bit of truth in there. I think I need to be on alert!