Life's hard at the moment :(

Finding things hard at the moment.... I've had anxiety and later depression after my son was born 23 years ago, and can't work because of it ... I've also got prolapsed discs, and up until Christmas my back had been better than it had in a long time, but Christmas day, standing for hours cooking, washing up, more cooking etc my back has deteriorated drastically, I really don't know if I 'did' something to it Christmas day or not ? I've just been waiting for it to improve as it usually will given time but it's been two months now and it's just as bad. Having back trouble for years I'm of the mind usually that you just get on with it, but I've got to be honest this time it's really getting me down. Consultant who was wonderful said that losing weight would help and here I am doing it ( lost 10lbs in six weeks ) and walk for two miles a day with pooch, but I feel pretty desperate at the mo, my 'back' feels it needs the weight gone now! And at 15' stone 9 I've got a way to go haven't i ? I'm 5' 6 so I estimate 10 stone would be good for my back, I just feel I've got no room for error here and that's what is making me feel desperate, I can't afford to slip up..... I feel like an old old woman, I changed my bed yesterday , you know normal stuff and today I'm holding on to the sofa to crawl up off it, didn't want to get out of bed because it hurt so much. IM unsure about asking to go back to the lovely consultant to check if I've got some new damage in case he thinks I've not lost enough weight, weight is something after all you can do something about . I'm just waiting for weigh day to come around every week to see if I've lost a 1 or 2 as I feel that's a 1 or 2 my backs not carrying :( I'm doing back exercises but my back is so terribly weak and brittle and I don't know if or when I should see any improvement ?

Sorry for going on and on and on, are my posts every short πŸ˜„ just needed to share how im feeling with you lovely lot ! Any back exercises or stretches you know help with back pain would be gratefully received!

Love to you all, trier xxxxx

17 Replies

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  • You poor love 🌼🌻

  • Aww thank you lovey ! Xxx

  • Sucks to hear you are in so much pain, you've been doing really well, i think we all wish there was an easier way to lose weight, but the hard work is so worth it in the end. I had a customer telling me about her gastric bypass op, shes done amazingly well losing weight, i personally couldnt do it as hate needles and things. Maybe your gp could refer you to a physical therapist that could help you to find exercises that are low impact on your back but will still enable you to lose weight? Keep up the excellent work, inspirational to us all to keep going. Set aside some time each day to rest up and relax, does nice warm bath help your back? Or maybe treat yourself to a massage to help unknot tight muscles. Ive always had a bad back (not as bad as yours tho) but losing weight is definitely easing it

  • Thank you darling. Yes, a hot bath definitely relieves the pain somewhat, just had one now, been that low I haven't bothered doing my hair or anything :(

    I think you're right, I need to go back to the docs and ask for a referral to a physio. And you're right again, I have now, which is new and hugely irritating , to pace myself, do a bit and then sit down, never had to do that before and it makes me feel so old ! Massage can be wonderful, who would have thought that your muscles being all knotted and tight could give you such pain and discomfort eh? Thanks for the reply, I knew I could rely on pals here ! Off to make gp appt. now.

    Love trier xxx

  • Hey no problem, we all have bad days, something as simple as washing our hair and putting on something nice can make us feel so much better about ourselves especially when being down. It does make you feel old but in the long run it will be for the best as you will be making yourself in more pain meaning you end up sofa bound a lot longer. Whereas now and then rests means you can stay active. You will get there. Good luck at gps x

  • Many many moons ago when I was young sailor on a brief shore draft, I used to regularly give an Old Chief Petty Officer a lift into work as he lived near me. He suffered terribly with his back, so bad that he allowed the Naval Surgeons to open him up a couple of times, anyway I feel racked with guilt now at how I used to chuckle to myself watching him struggle to get into my at the time very low coupe.

    Well of course Karma was watching and came back to bite me very firmly in my own back a few years later, to which I suffered years and years of issues with, anyway the point I am making is that it's very easy to dismiss other peoples back ache as nothing more than a minor ailment or a nuisance until you suffer the same fate first hand.

    I don't know what your personal circumstances are Trier but you need to look at asking for help from family and friends when in a situation like Christmas day and not to be embarrassed about it. I had a Prolapsed Disc, Acute Sciatica, Degenerative Discs (DDD) and a Dosel Injury, being on my feet for too long would often set thing off, of course at the time I was extremely overweight and very unfit, but I would tell my wife if I felt I was pushing something too far and she would then make me sit down for a while, a get me a hot wheat cushion, TLC etc, which is what you need to be doing!

    Anyway weight loss is by far the right direction to be going in, I used to blame my weight gain on my physical disabilities, back, shoulder etc but of course the truth was the opposite, easier to admit now. You need to stay hydrated as well, really important and will help no end with Disc Health, Posture is critical so be mindful of it, keep checking it all the time, the most comfy sitting position is necessarily the best for your back health, a low impact exercise like walking or gentle jogging will strengthen your core muscles and hopefully help to alleviate further damage.

    Anyway keep up the hard work it will pay of in the end, but stop worrying about it, just keep the emphasis on Healthy, you'll lose the weight but more important with the right balance of nutrition you'll start to feel epic.

    Remember it's not a sprint, it's a marathon that will last the rest of your life.

    Best Wishes

  • Thank you for such a supportive and informative reply ! I smiled twice ! Once when you said you chuckled at your petty officer pal having difficulty getting in to your car, aaahh the joy of being young and healthy! And secondly when you said about posture being important, I immediately sat up straighter as I was reading it !! Interesting you mentioning about water being so important for disc problems, it's made me want to investigate that particular point. Once again, I really enjoy your posts, always informative, practical and supportive, thank you !

  • I forgot to say that when reading of 'your' back conditions I felt embarrassed, it was obviously far more debilitating in all ways than mine. How you dragged yourself up by your boot laces is a huge credit to you.

  • I doubt my back was any worse than yours, prolapsed and herniated discs are extremely painful for all. The point is to not give up, be proactive, be in control and things will improve eventually.

  • Hi Trierisme

    My back has not been as bad as yours, but after too many years of sitting on the wrong size chairs and bending down to small desks, I ended up having to walk with a stick at times.

    I am now doing regular Pilates exercises with a qualified instructor and the exercises have strengthened my core muscles, improved my posture and seem to have had a beneficial impact on my general health. Perhaps Pilates might be something for you to consider?

  • Thanks for your reply. It definitely does seem something to look into ! When you say regular exercises with an instructor would that be once a week ? And yes, strengthening the core muscles is vital and I would be more likely to be motivated to do it on a one to one basis. I'm aware that I'm supposed to do my exercises when getting out of bed but it hurts too much and is too stiff to be able to do little more than hobble down the stairs swollow pain killers and wait for them to work. I'll look in to this, thank you, some hope ! Along with you and other friends here on the site I feel a little better.

  • For exercises to be of benefit you need to do them at least once every four and a half days, and no more frequently than 24.2 hours after your last session finished.

  • Yes, I do Pilates once a week in a group of 6, and, now I know what I'm doing, practise on my own between sessions. I've also started an Aquafit class at my local swimming pool, I don't think I could have attempted this before doing Pilates, I was too much of a wreck.

    Take things carefully and rest when you need.

  • Hello there. Do you mean back exercises ?

  • Hi i'm also a fellow sufferer of back pain, after years of working with children who had special needs i find now that i also have these 'needs' in general women just soldier on with their daily chores and are non complaining. It's only when our bodies REALLY let us down and we can no longer do the chores around the house that we'd like to do without it causing great pain that it becomes really debilatating depression sets in and if you like me have a tendancy to overeat then the vicious cycle begins of weighing yourself eating too much when you know what it's doing to your joints i have had some treatment carried out to my spine which has helped a bit and have joined an NHS weight watchers class, and a chair based exercise class and i feel as if i know what to do to reduce my weight but i have diffuculty putting the advice i'm given into practice at present i'm just plodding on in the hope that the 'lighbulb' moment will come soon i wish you well on your journey back to good health we are all on this journey and hopefully can learn from others and their experiences and tips on dieting and what their lighbulb moment was that made them up their game with weight loss good luck ☺ xxx

  • I'll try to be brief; not so much one light-bulb moment, but several.

    My mam had type 2 diabetes, that went undiagnosed until she was having severe hallucinations when I was 10 years old.

    About 10 years later I remember the frustration of her following healthcare advice, and not being able to control her blood glucose (in particular I recall her reading had rocketed, and she had only had a jacket potato).

    I thought I was eating healthily, following the balance of good health, then had a shock when a routine test when changing surgery showed glucose in my urine. Despite being conscientious, had the heredity factor caught up with me?

    Around the same time, I was fortunate to watch a film that changed my view on healthy eating. This was reinforced by the revelation of a senior local Public Health Directorate manager about the lack of evidence supporting 'healthy eating' guidelines (they waited until they were retiring).

    I started experimenting with controlled carb eating, which has evolved to my present understanding since then.

    I'd like to live a long and healthy life, and am now back on track!

  • Strength increases for a person should normally be evident within days.

    I had sciatica resulting from an incident when I was 8, that was alleviated by weight-training in my teens.

    I had a further, lower-back/hip injury from being over-zealous with the weights in my thirties, and was able to ease that by subsequent, sensible training.

    Essentially, you have to work at your own level, with proper warm-ups and cool-downs. Use safe, controlled movements to eliminate the risk of injury from momentum.

    Use a gym instructor to support you in learning exercises such as squats, deadlifts or back extensions on a machine.

    In the beginning, learn the movements with very light weights. This allows you to get used to how they should be done, and also minimise any soreness from your body adapting to the unfamiliar movement.

    Never sacrifice good form to increase the intensity; within a short while you may be able to add a small amount of resistance at most sessions, commensurate with your increasing strength. Be aware that some machines' weight increases are too large, and require intermediate saddle plates.

    The exercise should be brief, and cause your muscles to tire locally. However, don't 'go for the burn'; too much of a burning feeling in the muscles just indicates that you carried the exercise on for too long, and weren't able to get enough oxygen to the muscles as a result.

    Be safe; good luck!

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