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Appointment with consultant about birth options for second baby after difficult first birth

Star15 profile image
7 Replies

Hi everyone

We were lucky enough to fall pregnant on our first round of IVF after 5 failed rounds of Clomid - we experienced secondary infertility after conceiving our son naturally nearly 4 years ago, and I was subsequently diagnosed with polycystic ovaries. I’m currently 18 weeks.

I ended up having an emergency C-section with our son (was in the birthing pool and fully dilated but had no urge to push and it turns out this was because the umbilical cord was round our son’s neck 4 times...). It was all massively rushed, I had a general anaesthetic and my husband couldn’t be in the room.

We have an appointment with a consultant next week to discuss our options this time. After our son was born I was sure that if we ever had another baby I’d want to try naturally if possible but given our difficulties in getting pregnant and the birth last time I don’t know whether a planned C-section might be better as seems less risky... I’m not sure how much say we will have in it all anyway but just wondered if anyone has been in a similar situation and has any advice? Any questions that we should be asking the consultant, or thoughts on whether a planned C-section or VBAC might be better given our previous birth?

I’d be grateful for any thoughts! Thanks 😃 x

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KittyK profile image
KittyK

Didnt want to read and run. Our hospitals round here really push natural birth on you even if you're likely to have difficulties. They want to get their c section rates down so they can be a little biased. I'd say try for vaginal if you really want to and if things won't progress you know the c section is there? Sounds like you did everything right last time was just unlucky with the cord. If you ensure you're monitored thoroughly I don't see as trying for natural could hurt if it's important to you ?

However, I've never been through the situation like you so if you really feel you need some control or the trauma of last time outweighs the desire, take the c section if they offer it. I bet they will leave it in your court but push for a natural though. I wish you well whatever you decide, it's so important to remember you and baby matter most. Congratulations and best of luck! Xxx

Star15 profile image
Star15 in reply to KittyK

Thanks for your reply. So sorry about your BFN 😞 Hope you’re doing as well as you can be.

Yes they have absolutely left the decision up to us! Just trying to weigh everything up and decide what is best. You’re right we need to think about what is more important to us, whether that is having a natural birth this time or just wanting to have more control and hopefully take some of the uncertainty out of the whole thing. Pros and cons to both! Don’t need to decide til 36 weeks so plenty of time!

Look after yourself x

claire16c profile image
claire16c

It’s really such a personal decision. I had a section first time and so second time they gave me the leaflets and rcog guidelines/info on vbacs and elective sections. They said they weren’t there to tell me either way just give me the info and then ask what my decision was. Which was good as I’d been worrying they would push for a natural birth and I wanted a section! One of my reasons was that in the rcog leaflet it said that there was a 40% chance of assisted delivery, which I absolutely did not want after friends stories of taking months or longer to recover from forceps deliveries. I was also worried about tearing I think it was 10% chance of 3rd degree.

So anyway I went with the section, it was a nice calm experience, we could choose our music, no rushing about, all the theatre staff were chatting to us etc, baby put on my chest as soon as she came out.

But I can imagine for example some people who haven’t had a section before would do anything to avoid one. For me it was better the devil you know.

But if you want to try for a vbac I don’t see why you couldn’t because it sounds like if the cord hadn’t been in the way you would have had one before x

Star15 profile image
Star15 in reply to claire16c

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply and sorry for my delayed response. It was good to read about your experience. We had our appointment with the consultant yesterday and they were the same with us in that they gave us info about both elective C-sections and VBAC and said it’s really up to us. It’s good that your experience of C-section was nice and calm. We basically need to think it through a bit and will be seeing a midwife at the hospital in a few weeks to discuss it more. But they said final decision doesn’t need to be made until about 36 weeks! Am really in two minds... consultant said VBAC is likely to be uncomplicated for us (cord being round the baby’s neck like it was for our son very unlikely to happen again) and that labour may be quite quick as I was fully dilated last time before going on to have the C-section. But think I’d be worried about the chances of something going wrong and needing a C-section anyway so ending up wishing we’d just done that to start with (really don’t like the thought of me being under general anaesthetic and my husband out of the room again like last time 😞). But then there’s the recovery from C-section and not being able to drive which could make things tricky in terms of getting my son around... Plus possible complications like infections etc.

Lots to think about! Thanks again for getting back to me 😃 x

claire16c profile image
claire16c in reply to Star15

No worries :)

I started driving after 3 weeks each time so to be honest by the time I was feeling more normal I was back in the car! I was worried about that too - ending up with a section anyway!

Glad you were the given the info on both and not pushed into either and hope you can come to a conclusion :)

Star15 profile image
Star15 in reply to claire16c

Oh really, you were driving after 3 weeks? That would be great as my husband would be around for the first couple to ferry us around, I thought it was something to do with insurance that said it needed to be 6 weeks? Thanks again for your help! X

claire16c profile image
claire16c in reply to Star15

The 6 week thing seems to be a myth. My insurance just said as soon as hospital or dr says you’re ok to drive!

Exactly so by time he’s back at work you wouldn’t have long anyway x

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