Trying for a baby while changing careers-thoughts?

[Brandi1234]

I’m in the midst of changing jobs and careers but I also want to try for a baby.

I’m conflicted; on one hand I want to change career and I’m interviewing for jobs right now. This is something I’ve wanted to do for years and it’s something I’d like to do before having a baby because it’s more money, security etc. And more opportunities for when I go back to work after may leave.

I’m worried about changing jobs then finding out I’m pregnant because naturally with a new job, I can’t predict how I’ll manage being early pregnant and learning a new trade or what if the worst happens and I don’t know if I can rely on my new boss etc,?

I’m thinking that maybe I should hold off on trying until I’ve been in the new job for a few months so at least I’ve gotten the hang of things and have my bearings.

But of course, that means waiting on baby which is worrying. What if I wait and then it doesn’t happen for me etc., I had a m/c not long ago and have been so excited to start trying again the thought of waiting even longer is depressing.

I just don’t know if changing careers and trying for a baby at the same time is a bad idea, should I go for one and hold off on the other?

Any thoughts or experiences I’d love to hear. Thanks all 💜

[Pasaeoco01]

Hey there! I can totally relate to this! I had the same situation. Although I had been TTC for sometime without any luck.In the end I decided I couldn’t live my life in hold because I ‘might’ get pregnant and I started a new job.

Typically I fell pregnant only a few months into my new job - thankfully I had qualified for the maternity benefits given I had been there long enough, but only just!

Not sure how we’d have coped if we hadn’t. I was still a little worried as I was still within my probation period so although it wouldn’t look great for my new employer they could have found another reason to ‘get rid of me’.

As it happens employer was fantastic and they took the news really well.

So in all honesty whilst I don’t think we should live waiting for something to happen, it could be financially more sensible. Assuming of course you’re happy enough where you are and maternity benefits are good.

If you current employer is poor with limited mat leave benefits you may just decide to go for it anyway.

Or...use contraception just for a few months until you’re settled with new employer and you’re certain you qualify for their benefits

Hope that helps!!!x

[Brandi1234 in reply to Pasaeoco01]

Thanks so much for sharing your experience, great to hear from someone in a similar boat!!

For me it’s less about maternity benefits etc because neither job has any lol.

I’m just more concerned about getting pregnant soon after getting a new job and the extra stress that puts on everything because this will be learning a while new industry as opposed to staying in my current job where I know everything like the back of my hand.

Did you find being pregnant at a new job was extra stressful or not so much? X

[SRA8]

I'd go for it. You just dont know how long it's going to take. You'll be living your life on hold if it doesnt happen quickly. Took me 2.5 years. Fingers crossed it happens timely for you.

[Brandi1234 in reply to SRA8]

Thanks.l! That’s exactly my worry, waiting until the ‘right’ time and then it doesn’t happen I’ll be furious with myself!

[Jogsandwalks]

I can really relate to this post because I wanted a baby for ages before I got pregnant. I went through a whole career change last year and started my new job at the end of the year in December.

But regardless of my feelings, I knew I had to be financially stable and settled because I knew I didn't want to bring a baby into an unstable environment.

I found it hard with my friends being pregnant around me and my eggs slowly dwindling away as I reach my mid 30s but I'm glad I was patient. I'm currently on week 19 and I'm in a good position that I don't need to worry about money once the baby comes.

I strongly advise you to go for the career change and job first. I was lucky enough to get pregnant very easily and you may too. But the last thing you want to worry about when you do is money.

[Brandi1234 in reply to Jogsandwalks]

Thank you for sharing Xxx

[Jenjen84]

I put my career before having a baby, I studied for 5 years and waiting till I was in my early 30s and it then took us 4 years to have our son. He is now 2 years old and I’m just about to change careers again and go back to studying as I now realise the high pressure of my current profession just doesn’t align with my new priorities of being a Mum. I’d say start trying, you have the rest of your life to concentrate on your career but only a small window in the great scheme of things to have a child. Whatever you decide though, I wish you the best of luck in both 🥰 xx

[Brandi1234 in reply to Jenjen84]

Thank you so much for sharing 💜 I definitely have been thinking about that sentiment exactly, that there’s only so much time to have a baby (I am in my 30s!) and I suppose career change can happen any time! Xxxx

[PreggoAvocado]

I changed jobs for the first time in 8 years for a role at a competitor company with high responsibility and a steeeeep learning curve. Took a pregnancy test before accepting the offer and all as I had similar concerns to you. You might guess where this is going... 😅.

A week before starting the new job I found out I was ~5 weeks pregnant and freaked the hell out!!!!

What do you know, the new place, and the people have all been wonderful. Although I don't qualify for SMP, as I started the job already pregnant, the new company is more compatible with parenthood (less strict hours, wfh, etc.), so I'll be able to breastfeed for longer and generally be more present once the goblin comes out. I'm currently 6 months pregnant and I've been fairly asymptomatic (although there have been a few health scares 👀) so it's been ok to manage expectations and pregnancy. I did wait until my probation was up (3 months) to tell them, just in case.

In some ways, the pregnancy has put everything else into perspective, and as a result I've struggled less with the insecurities and stress related to taking a new job.

In your position, I would probably wait until I start the new job to start trying purely for financial reasons (maternity allowance is lower than SMP), but other than that, go for it!

[Brandi1234 in reply to PreggoAvocado]

Thank you so so much for sharing that’s really lovely to hear someone in a similar position 😊 I’m not in the UK so financial wise with may benefits etcs it’s not much different from one job to another for me. I’m hoping that if it does all happen at once I’ll be met with support from my new employer 😊 Xxxx

[LauraColb]

hello!

I would love similar advice. I have been ttc for 8 months and am very unhappy in my current role. I’ve cut my hours and started freelancing on the side to broaden my horizons and I’ve been on and off applying for other jobs with no luck - until now! I’ve just been offered another job which is in the field I’m interested in although looks like a steep learning curve and I wouldn’t say my ‘dream job’ as I’m not honestly sure what that is anymore.

The problem is that I’m due a financial promotion at my current job and/or a bonus and the maternity pay is excellent - 6 months full pay, plus 7 weeks leave. The new job is less pay and less Mat pay (3 months full pay then drops). We don’t have many savings.

I have my heart set on having a baby and have no clue how long it will take — I’m having fertility tests now. So it feels selfish and stressful to move to something with less pay and maternity support. But it could do wonders for my mental health.

Would love some advice x

[Brandi1234 in reply to LauraColb]

hello! Super apologies for the late response, I’m not active here anymore but am happy to reply with my thoughts and personal experience if you still are looking for advice? Just want to check before I put together my response to you, perhaps you e already made your choices and don’t need my opinion anymore anyways, happy to contribute if you would like, just let me k is!