Stressed out

Hi everyone, just feel like I need to unload. ( this May be a long one). Got so much running through my mind.

So I'm 23 wks now and dd Xmas day. I also have 4 children two of wich were born premature at 28 wks both due to placental abruptions, so considered high risk with this pregnancy I have to be scanned and see my consultant fortnightly from 26wks onwards. So far baby is perfect no worries with her at all ( by the way I'm having a little girl and very happy, that will make it 3boys, 2 girls perfect.) The reason for this is to scan my placenta this makes me feel pretty rubbish as the problem is with me it's like I can't even carry my babies properly. My last meetin with my consultant he pretty much said be prepared for it to happen again as it's happened to me twice it's more than likely going to happen again .(I've allready got my hospital bag packed on the docs advice just Incase) . So I'm constantly fearing I could have her at any time.

Then this brings me to my next worry, how will I cope with a poorly baby and daily vists to hospital and weekend stays with her ( this is what I done with my last 2 preemies) all with 4 children to care for at home and the months leading up to Xmas it's going to be a nightmare.

Then let's say I carry this baby full term ( I'm praying pls stay in there baby) docs will not let me have a vaginal birth and will book me in for a c section at 39 weeks, exactly one week before Xmas what bad timing . I have allready told the children that Xmas will be different this year and probably no Xmas dinner. They seem fine with this tho.

Also I'm havin such trouble sleeping lately the other night I was still awake at four in the morning so decided to get up and have a cuppa also Cleaned the kitchen while I was there I just can't sleep it's constantly " now what have I got to do about this and what shall I do about that, what shall I do next and omg my heads gonna explode,.

Oh well at least the kids are back at school next week , yaaaaaaaay.

Sorry if I've been waffling on a bit, I hope I've made sense ( my mum says I've defiantly got pregnancy brain.)

Thanks for reading xxx

4 Replies

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  • Hi Bella 16,

    Sorry you have so much to worry about, as you know worrying has a negative effect on your health and baby's too. All you can do is pray and hope for the best. I recommend hypnosis where you train your mind to think positively and imagining that the little one hangs in there for as long as possible. Anything is possible. Try to involve all your family and friends should baby turn up early so at least they are helping with looking after the other kids. I have 3 girls and expecting baby number 4, I am due my first scan tomorrow. It has all been natural births but with the middle child I had pre eclampsia at the last minute and as a result my Placenta was retained. I had to go to theatre to have it manually removed and then I reacted to the epidural as well. With the last one all went well as the team had a clear plan on monitoring me and what needs to be done should that happen again. I had baby at 6 am and was home by lunch time. It was expected to happen again and it did not. So if you have had a bad experience it does not necessarily mean it will happen again. Good luck and I wish you well. XXX

  • First things first, congratulations on your pregnancy :) But with all that to contend with, no wonder you're worried about things.

    Do you have any friends/family nearby to support you? Is it possible for them to look after the other children if you need to be at the hospital?

    Doctors always go with worst case scenarios to cover their backs, that way they can say they informed you of the risks. It doesn't necessarily mean things will be difficult this time, they just want to prepare you. Thinking positively, you've had 5 pregnancies of which 3 haven't involved premature birth/placental abruption. But having had those problems it's only natural for you to worry, that's what being a good mum is about (caring about your babies' health).

    How old are your other children? Could any of them help out with minor tasks? I'm thinking, supervising brushing of teeth before bed/school? Putting out the recycling? Depending on what your happy with, it might free up some of your time for other stuff.

    As regards Xmas, if the other children seem happy with no Xmas dinner go with it. They get a new sister, I'm sure that will more than make up :) You could start getting presents now, buy some of those huge santa sacks and put them straight in the sacks and tie up. No pesky wrapping to deal with.

    The lack of sleep must be the worst, I find with me it just makes everything more difficult when you're tired. I have a notebook by the bed and I write everything that pops in to my head in there under the heading "For the morning" to help me put the thoughts aside for later. At the moment it's helping with the list of bits and bobs I still haven't bought with 2 weeks to go.

    I hope that helps, and keep us up to date with progress. You'll have plenty of support on here x

  • As a nurse by profession I would be a millionaire if I had a pound for every patient the doctors closely monitored because of previous medical history, who had no complications during their treatment. Its like flying a plane, you have plans in place in case of trouble but actually never need to use them.

    I find visualisation help me when I was worried during my pregnancy. One I especially liked is where you lie on the side of a sunny riverbank, there is a raft with a big box nearby. You place all your worries into the box as gently push the raft into the river and watch your troubles float away.

    Trust in you baby girl that she knows what she's doing, her previous two siblings obviously did as they are growing up strong.

  • Thank you so much for your replys. It really helps to read your thoughts and ideas, I liked the idea of the 'morning list' note pad next to the bed, I'll defiantly do that, and the Santa sack is a good one I hate wrapping so thank you they were great. Well I will defiantly think more positive now the kids are back at school and I'm back in my old routine I'm feeling calmer now, still worried about baby coming early but I know I've got a healthy baby girl and if she does come early then I'll deal with it and she will be fine as will everything else. Thank you for your support .x. #relax.

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