Good morning family. We opened the conversation with the physical act. We maintain the same disclaimer, in the last 30 minutes, I have not managed to write this and get a higher-level degree in sexology or whatever it is called. It constantly amazes me that we can talk about protective underwear and soiling ourselves but not about sex. Maybe it is just me, I will and do talk about it and "YOU" just read and shake your head.
No matter on to the emotional side of SEX. What was no longer is. I have the memories forever, they are mine as they are yours. In my memories, I can be casanova, or Zeus like. I know I am not, was never, never will be. They can be my memories. They do not have to be real (let me assure "YOU" they were not). Emotionally and in my memories, I can make them anything I want. I do not have to make myself a frail limp man. I can be young and adventurous again. I can make myself something I never was and only I need to know. I can give myself emotional strength by being something not exactly what I was. Yes, technically this is lying to myself, but if I know it. Who am I hurting, certainly not myself?
I allow myself to tell only myself stories at times. The reality of constant deterioration is far to much a burden to always have. I do not constantly need to be reminded of what I am not. Good communication is so important in this. A partner that "YOU" can talk with openly and honestly is a great thing to have. To be able to say "I am sorry not right now, or no that does not work, is so very important. To be able to not perform and not be judged is so critical. "YOU" are opening yourself to somebody else. To have that person understand and not judge "YOU" is so (YOU choose the word).
Give yourself time and be open to SEX different to what "YOU" remember. Make your own rules and try new ways. Sex does not have to be pre ms style. Open yourself to new things. Explore yourself and your Partner\Spose.
Royce (your ms writer and brother)
your turn now
